Faithfully :)

Last short note.

2011-11-20T22:14:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone!

So now I'm not going to put this blog on private anymore, but just so you know, I'm not going to update it anymore. I moved to a new blog, so you can read my stories there (if you're still interested of course). Oh well, bye bye, and see you soon!

syirabyrne.blogspot.com

My baby dream

2010-11-27T00:43:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum ,

Haha, I smiled so broadly this morning. I woke up and got a text from Mr.A. Serious, at first, I was like, "Haha, kenapa tetiba mamat ni rajin gila hantar mesej pagi-pagi?" But then, even if it's just a simple 'good morning', I appreciate it. Bukan senang nak tunggu dia mesej dulu, asyik-asyik saya je kena start dulu.

Anyway, my mother told me that Mak Uda gave birth to her first daughter today :) Awww, now little Zaqwan has a little sister :D Waaaa, I want a kid so darn badly! I want a boy, oh no no, a girl, yep, a girl :D And she's gonna be very well behaved (just like me, haha) and if she ever does something wrong, well, all her bad traits must come from the father I guess? HAHAHAHAHA XD

I seriously cannot be around kids. If I do, I WILL want one. Okay I'm a total psycho. Yeah, I'm only 15 but thinking of these things. Gosh, and people keep on talking about the pain of giving birth... honestly, I don't care. I used to scare about the pain, but now, not that much. I had a dream, that I was in an excruciating pain of giving birth, but when the baby popped out, it all worth it. She's so tiny, so innocent, so cute. And the feeling when she squeezed my finger for the first time, there's nothing like it. But still, it's all a dream. I was so frustrated when I woke up. I wish to have that dream again, I want to see that baby, my daughter. Mr.A once said that the baby girl in my dream WILL someday be mine in real life. When he said that, I wiped away my tears, and smile again. Yeah, he's right, maybe some day. Amin ..

Okay okay, back in real life *wiping away the tears*.. okay I can't talk much. I guess all of you must think that I'm a total psycho now, right? Maybe I am, but that dream, really changed my mind about having children. :)

I guess I'll stop now. Assalamualaikum.

Semak gila orang macam ni ouh.

2010-11-27T00:15:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

Waalaikumsalam, nama saya Syahirah Hazidi. Saya berumur 15 tahun, sekolah di Pandan Jaya. Saya tinggal di Cheras, Selangor, Malaysia, Benua Asia, Bumi yang indan nian, galaksi Bima Sakti. Apa saya tengah buat? Saya tengah onlinelah, tak nampak ke? Ya, saya dah makan, dah mandi, dah minum, dah lompat-lompat dan sebagainya. Apa? Nak nombor telefon? Awak tak malu ke minta nombor dari orang yang baru kenal? Ya, saya dah ada boyfriend. Dah kahwin dah pun.

Penat saya baca soalan yang sama, dan jawab jawapan yang sama. Apa? Mamat-mamat ni dah tak ada soalan lain ke nak tanya? Dah tak ada idea sangat ke? Eh, ambillah nasihat saya, kalau tak ada benda nak cakap, janganlah tegur. Mengganggu tahu tak?

Saya taknaklah letak status 'OFFLINE' setiap kali saya log in Facebook saya. Saya pun nak tengok siapa kawan saya yang online, chat dengan mereka yang sepatutnya dan sebagainya. Tapi asal tukar status online je, mesti ada yang mengacau. Lepas seekor, seekor. Kalau tk layan, dikatakan sombong. Saya tak nak pula jadi sombong.

Oh, bukan tu saje. Kalau nak tegur saya, TOLONGLAH guna bahasa Melayu, atau bahasa Inggeris. Ni tak, ada seorang mamat ni, asal tegur je cakap Jawa. Macam mana saya nak faham awak cakap apa? Lepas tu awak macam salahkan saya sebab tk faham apa yang awak cakap. Ish, belajar bahasa dulu sebelum salahkan orang, okayy?

Perkara pokoknya, leave me ALONE kalau tak cakap bahasa saya, dan kalau tak tahu nak cakap apa. Semaklah.

p.s Leceh pula nak delete kawan. Huuh -_-

Changing.

2010-11-26T06:28:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

In a few weeks, I'm going to move in my new room. I will no longer share bedroom with my sister, I can finally have my own privacy in my own room, I can finally yield her out of a room and claim "This is my room, get lost!" and I can finally sleep without any distraction. Ah, good times lie ahead of me. I can't wait to move in ! This Sunday, there will be people coming to paint the room and after that, I can start decorating. Heeee :D

But then, there are some problems that I have to settle with my sister. This morning, we argued about novels. She said that I'll have the Harry Potter collection, so she wants the Sophie Kinsella collection. I was like, "Okay, but only take the ones that are yours. I want mine," and she said no! I was like, WTF??!! Some books in the collection are MINE, and I want MY BOOK. Then she started mumbling about how the Harry Potter books are not mine. Hey ! You don't read the books, you don't ask for the books from daddy, so you don't have ANY RIGHTS for the books. I'm the one that begged daddy to buy the books, so he bought it for me. I don't care, I want my rights. There's no way I'm giving away my Harry Potter books to her, or any Sophie Kinsella books that are MINE.

Huuh, okay, forget about that. Anyway, I took a look at my books earlier and realized something. Hey, I don't own even ONE true Malay novel ! No no, not that I don't read Malay books, just... well, I do have Harry Potter that's in Malay, I read those when I still suck in English. Then there's Enid Blyton books, that are translated into Malay, pfft, I read those in Standard 3 or 4. Goshh, I don't own even one Malay novel ! Hish, orang Melayu apa kau ni Syahirah?

Then I spent some time cleaning my future room. Oh my my, some areas were so dusty. The windows made it seem like I can never move it! But no worries, I'm the kind of girl, that when she wants something, she'll get it done. So, I'll try my very best to make the room spotless! Insya-Allah :)

Oh, and Mr.A sent me the sweetest text ever earlier. Awhhh, I miss him too :( I want to call him, but I'm afraid he's busy, and I'm interrupting his work. But still, I want to hear his voice. Does he want to hear mine?

Baby, you drive me insane.

I guess I'll stop now :) Bye bye :D

Assalamualaikum.

The Day I'll Never Forget

2010-11-25T07:27:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

It's true that time is flying but too fast.

I guess Miley Cyrus's lyrics really describe what I felt earlier. Before I knew it, it's already the end of the year. Before I knew it, I already finished my year as a Form 3 students and before I knew it, this day might be the last day I'm gonna have so much fun with my fellow classmates.

Yeah, it's kinda sad but... lets just forget about it for a sec. Today, I went to Tesco Ampang with Maryleen for our class feast :) We got there quite late but we still have to wait for Filzah and Munie. Then, we saw Shida and Aishaa came together :) Since there's quite a number of people that hadn't came, we went to Popular to look for some books. Man, there's so many books that I wanted to buy but I did not bring much money :( Hish !

For the feast, we had that 6 cheese pizza or something like that. And it was delicious ! I ate 2 slices and I thought I ate the most. Turns out, Eric and the guys ate 3 slices. Man ! How did they do that??!!
But I was so impressed by Filzah. She ate like.. well, a machine. When everyone was busy taking pictures, I turned around and saw her slurping the soup. I sat with Puan Zaleha, talked and talked, and I turned around, I saw her eating the last piece of pizza. I was like... "Wey, semua org dah habis makan !" and she was like, "Ni dah nak habis ni! Janganlah membazir!"

Yet, she has thin and small body. With that kind of body, you can eat all you want and not worry anything about getting fatter. Gosh, some people are so lucky.

After the feast, we wandered around the Tesco. Filzah and I stopped by at the stall that sell the strawberry chocolate. She suddenly asked my opinion and asked me to pick one chocolate gift. I asked her, "For what?"
and she was like, alaaa, pilih lah satu. So I picked one that I like. I teased her, "Untuk H eh?"
She simply smiled and paid for the gift. Then, she handed me the gift and said "Untuk kau lah!"
Huh? It's for me? It came a total shock for me and yet, I'm so touched. Wah Fil ! Sumpah aku sayang gila babengs kat kau! Thanks so much for the teddy bear and chocolate. It's so sweet babe, love ya!

And she treated me today :) We shared cotton candy, and we walked to the CD store, the Living Cabin... I wanted to buy her something but I'm currently broke. It's okay, I'm gonna get her something special one day. Hey, any suggestion what to give to your best friend?

But then, I saw my mom and realized that we had to go home. I looked for Mary and we went back together.

I had a great day today. I got to see my best friends that I missed the most these few weeks, I got to spend some time with my classmates, I got to taste that 6 cheese pizza... wahh :) great times.

Whatever happens, I will never forget today. 3RK1, I love you guys so much ! And oh, to 3RK2, I love you guys too (kang touching pulak). Heee, I'm going to miss the RK's next year. Lets just pray next year gonna be much better eh?

Assalamualaikum.

Lost Spirit.

2010-11-24T02:15:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

Sometimes I feel like I lost all spirit to update this blog. Not that I'm busy or anything, I'm starting to find myself lacking of ideas and losing my ability to write. And it makes me tick, maybe writing is not my talent after all. Besides, I start to think that I'm just writing crap here, and what's the point writing when no one's reading it, or there's people reading it, but not taking it seriously. I want to be taken seriously, but, haihh, none of my piece can be taken seriously right?

What's the point of writing this blog anyway? At first, I thought of writing for fun, and just let people know who I really am. I'm not fake, I'm not trying to be anybody. But why does that change? Eventually, when my followers number increases, I tend to look at their blogs, and got impressed and eventually try to write like them. What happened to 'writing for fun'? Somehow I forgot all about that, and lose myself. And I don't want to lose myself.

Hish, am I losing myself here? Sometimes I'm thinking of closing this blog for good. But then... it's like shutting down one part of yourself. Erghhhh.. confused, AGAIN.

Semaklah, bye bye.

Assalamualaikum.

Missing party :)

2010-11-22T18:36:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

I did not blog for quite a few days right? Miss me? Awwh, I miss you too ! Haha (perasan kejap, KEJAP je, ek'eleh). Erm, actually I did want to blog yesterday but somehow my laptop had some sort of problem and it won't turn on. Waaa, thank God it's alright now. I miss it so much ! Special thanks to daddy for fixing it :D

So, two days ago, I went for my cousin's house for his birthday party :) Lucky guy, he's only 5 and already had his birthday party. I'm 15 now and no one ever throw a party for me, isk isk isk. Oh well, I'm too old for parties like that anyways. By the way, I enjoyed his party :) There's nasi hujan panas, ayam masak merah, kuah dal and daging masak hitam for the main menu. For sides, they served sate and for deserts, cupcakes !

Sara was so cute, she just smiled and smiled. But the birthday boy, Ariff was so cruel to her. He won't let Sara play with her. Haihh, same like me though. I'd do everything to get my sister out of my way.
And there's too many kids came for the party. So I spent most of my time trying to get away from the kids :)

We left early, I did not feel well. It's just too bad I did not get the chance to taste that Ultraman cake -_-
But it's quite funny to see Ariff during the cake-cutting :) He came, people sang Happy Birthday, he smiled so broadly, cut the cake and quickly went away from there to play with his friends. Heyhh, mini VIP :D

Enough with the party, lets talk about me. Waaa, I'm missing Mr.A doh -_- I know lah baru semalam bergayut, tapi... sheeh, I miss him already. Syahirah Hazidi, somehow there's a part of me that cannot be satisfied when it comes to him. Is it a bad thing, or a good thing?

And I am not feeling well these days. One of my ears somehow is tersumbat and I can only hear clearly with one ear. I feel like a complete freak ! -_- I want my both ears back ! Allah, help me :'(.

My insecurities starts to fade away. Lets hope it won't come back.

Assalamualaikum.

Si Gemuk Gedempol diperli

2010-11-19T23:30:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

I.LOVE.YOU.SO.MUCH. I don't know how, I don't know why I first fall in love with you. To top it all, I think I'm obsessed with you. You're in my mind, all the time, you never leave. I fear of losing you. I don't want to lose you. And yesterday, you didn't call, and I missed you like hell. What's happening to you? Are you okay? Yes, I'm obsessed, worried too much.... people, help me :(

-Hari ini saya nak berbahasa Melayu-

Kadang-kadang saya penat rasa macam itu. Susah bebenar hendak tenangkan hati saya yang selalu bergelora ni. Kadang-kadang saya bosan juga baca post-post saya sebelum ini yang sentiasa berjiwang dan bermadah asmara tu. Kadang-kadang saya amat bosan dengan diri saya sendiri. Penat tau jadi saya. Serius saya cakap, lirik-lirik rock ~~parang~~ kapak itu pun tak sejiwang saya <-- Okay ini saya perasan sahaja.

Biarlah. Korang mesti taknak baca pasal ke-jiwang-an saya en? Okay kita cerita benda lain jom?

Hari ini saya bangun pukul 10 pagi :) Ya, awal kan? Seronok gila kot, bangun-bangun dah nampak nasi lemak atas meja. Well, walaupun bukan nasi lemak kedai tiga hengget yang selalu saya beli tu, tapi itu tetap nasi lemak kan? Dan nasi lemak tetap menjadi kegemaran saya sejak kecil, dan sampai bila-bila. Eeee, bakunya !

Haha, dan masa makan nasi lemak tu, saya terfikir sejenak, baru-baru ni, sarapan saya mesti berasaskan nasi. Eeeeeeee, padanlah berat badan makin naik ! Sarapan ada nasi, lunch ada nasi, makan malam pun nasi jugak. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee !!! Then saya tengok dalam cermin, ya Allah, makin berisi pula pipi saya yang sedia berisi ni? Oh tidakkkkk !!! Tak kisah apa yang jadi, hari ni saya nak exercise ! Yes ! Nak exercise ! Hoyeahhh. Erm, jap, sekarang dah pukul 3 petang eh? Errr, start esoklah :)

Lepas tu saya pergi tengok tv en, kebetulan masa tu ada rancangan America's Next Top Model. Eh, tengok tu ! Televisyen pun nak perli saya ke? Cemburu tauuu tengok model-model yang sangat keding macam tak makan setahun tu. Diorang pakai baju mahal-mahal, jalan dekat runway macam kucing.... haihhh, bilalah saya boleh jadi macam tu? Takkan boleh kot?

Then Mr.A call saya, boleh pula dia tanya model-model tu pakai bikini ke tak? Serious rasa macam nak tendang je mamat tu, haha :) Tak apa tak apa, kalau dia suka tengok model perempuan berbikini, ingat saya tak suka ke tengok model laki berseluar dalam sahaja? Oh wow o_o

Lepas borak punya borak, saya pergi ke depan tv lagi, televisyen tu perli saya lagi tahu??? Ada ke patut dia tunjuk rancangan The Biggest Loser Asia? What the duckkkk ??!! Nak perli saya lagi lah tu en??? Tapi serius saya cakap, tengok orang gemuk comel tu exercise, saya rasa lapar pula. Mummy ! Dalam peti ais ada aiskrim tak? (tengok dorang exercise panas-panas tu, teringin pula saya nak makan aiskrim Sundae McD.. slurpppp).

Ish, memandangkan TV ni asyik memerli saya aje, saya masuk bilik dan buka laptop saya. Singgah sebentar ke Youtube and nampak pula video Masterchef. Apahal video makanan pula ni? Jangan kata komputer pun nak perli saya? Ishh, macam ni rupanya erti kawan en? :(

Sudahlah, nak off. Tidur lagi baik. Ya Allah, janganlah beri saya mimpi ber-jogging atau berlariiiii :( Saya tak nak kena perli lagi ouh, kasihanilah hamba-Mu yang gemuk gedempol ini ya Allah :((

p.s Kalau dapat mimpi berlari, next time aku tidur, aku bawa basikal sekali. Boleh tukar mimpi naik basikal en? Mengarut.

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows.

2010-11-19T08:12:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

As everybody knows, the latest movie of Harry Potter was out :) Man, I remembered daddy bought the book when I was in Standard 6 and tortured me for it. Seriously people, he knew I was dying to read the book and he bought the book just a few months before my UPSR started. He said that I can only read the book after UPSR. My daddy's mean :(

And the book's AWESOME ! As soon as I got the book, I read it non-stop. Harry Potter collection is the best ever, and until now, I haven't found a single book that can fill Harry Potter's place in my heart. So far, there's no character in any book that truly speaks to me like Harry does, there's no book so far that can make me really remember the story and there's no book so far that can make me really obsessed.

It annoys me when people call themselves "A true Potter fan" when they only watch the movie, and do not read the book. The movies are nice but they're not actually as good as the books. Example, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, the book is awesome but the movie disappointed me big time. So, to those who call themselves True Potter Fan before even reading the book, stop kidding yourself babes. (ya Allah, sombongnya ayat!)

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows touched my heart the most I'd say. There's too much nice character died. Lupin and Tonks died, and he did not even have much time with his son. And one of the Weasley twins died :( And... oh I last read the book in Standard 6, excuse me for not remembering. But I almost cried reading about Snape's true love for Lily Potter. His sacrifice for her, and he kept it all the time.... He's a great character, and I cried when he died. Darn you Voldemort -_-

Although, personally, I dislike it when Harry married Ginny in the end :( I prefer him being with Hermione, I have no idea why.. but I'm sure I'm not the only one, right?

Basically, I LOVE Harry Potter and I doubt any book can ever replace it in my heart. Dearest J.K Rowling, you did the best job with this book and this book really kept me company for a very long time. Thanks so much :)

That's all for now people :) See ya !
Assalamualaikum.

p.s Siapa yang baik hati nak bawa saya pergi tengok movie ni?

Modesty.

2010-11-19T07:44:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

I hate her. Who? My damn sister of course. This morning, she turned on the computer, and found the voice controller was broken down or something and instead of finding a way to fix it, she blamed it all on me ! Stupid right? How's that my fault? I turned on the computer and it was fine, nothing's broken and when I turned it off, it was still in tip-top shape. But when she turned on the computer, it's broken. How's that my fault? It broke down when you used it idiot, even the stupidest person in the world can tell that it's YOUR fault !

Then I read her status and she said I'm jealous at her because she's smarter than me? What the hell??! Yo, you're not smarter and you'll never be ! Somehow I will always know more than you. And by the way, I am never ever jealous of you. I've got tons of better person to be jealous at, and believe me, they're much more smarter than you.

Sometimes I had enough of you rudeness. You're rude to everyone ! Even to mummy and daddy ! You're too busy accusing them for being bias but you have no idea how you act around them ! You yell at them, you called daddy crazy when he's mad at you, you yelled at mummy, and your words simply hurts. You said I'm annoying for keeping quiet most of the time but sometimes it's much better than saying bad stuff to parents. I'm annoying because I'm polite? Puh-lease.

I will admit that you're smart. But you have no idea how it feels like to be in the bottom. And because of that, you have no manner towards others, and you wonder why you can't easily get friends like I do?
Just one thing you should remember, the bigger you are, the harder you fall. Just because you never get to the bottom, doesn't mean you never will. Just because you've been in the bottom and bounced back, doesn't mean you can't fall down again.

Just learn modesty, and you'll accomplish better.

Assalamualaikum.

Kids, haha

2010-11-18T08:01:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Okay, it feels like forever since my last post. Miss me? Hehe, I'm sorry. It's just things had been hectic in Batu Gajah until I was too tired to set up my laptop there. Oh well.

So, how's your Aidiladha? Mine was fine. Not that good, not that boring either. The food was awesome. The first dinner there, my opah, opah chik and opah cho did the cooking and ya Allah, I had no idea which one to eat first. I ate so much that I thought my stomach would explode anytime soon !

Before dinner, Mak Yang brought lemon cheesecake from Secret Recipe. Yeahh... it was no good, but my mother LOVES it. That's the time when I realized that mummy and I are both very different people, very different tastes.

The raya day, we went to Seputeh (sorry if it's spelling error). It was quite funny though. The tuan rumah said to the maid "Ada orang datang, pergi buat air" and by that, she asked her to prepare tea or coffee for us. But then, she literally made water. Plain water :)

I almost laughed though, oh well :) And at that moment, I realized that we have to speak clearly to our maids. They're from other country, don't expect them to know the language we speak everyday :)

After that, they went to... well, I don't know that place. I just tagged along. There, they all went to the mosque to meet some relatives. I did not follow them. Why? THEY SLAUGHTERED COWS THERE. I do not eat beef, as last year, I saw a cow being slaughtered, and I felt too sorry for the cow that I vow not to eat any beef as long as I shall live.

Poor cow. I still remember last year, I watched the cow being tied down, and the cow looked at me straight in the eyes like calling for help and it moo-ed and... waaaa, the next thing I know, there's blood and.. *trauma*. One thing I know, I cried. Waaaaaaaaaaaaa !! POOR INNOCENT COWWWW !!!! The eyes weh, the eyes :'(

And today I said to my dad "You're heartless for killing cows you know?"

He said "That's how Allah told us to do. How else should I kill the cow?"

How? I don't know. Oh well, there's tons of things to eat other than beef. Oh, and I don't eat anything that have four feet :)

After that, we went home and relaxed. Caca played with her father's DSLR and got scolded by her mother. And Mikail, my sweetie pie was soooo cute :) Haha, I love him though, he's not as noisy and was so much easier to handle.

Caca kept asking me to play the sewing online game. Me, who was too lazy to cope with children at the moment, took the pillows and fell asleep. My Mak Yang was the one that kept her company and found the game for her :) Thank you Mak Yang !

Although, I thought she'd shut up when she got the game, but she woke me up and asked me to play the game for her ! Waaaaaaaaaaaa !! Then, I pretended to fall asleep. At first, she bought it and leave me alone. After that, I talked to Mak Yang and Caca was like , "Haaaa !! Kata tido ! Dah jaga !!! Jom lahhh...."

Then I pretended to fall asleep again. Pfft, kids :) I wonder if Mak Yang had to face the same problem with me when I was little child? Oh no no, I'm too nice :) *perasan jap*

At night, my uncle brought his family, and that added one more kid, named Diana and she's probably the most beautiful kid I had ever seen :) She's so nice, not much to handle and I saw her wanting to play with me and Mikail. She helped us to pick up the toys and when she did that, Mikail took it from her slowly, and pushed her away slowly so he can play with me alone. Poor her :( I was like... "Oh man, Mikail.... -_- " but I could not stop myself from laughing too.

Acara paling mahal : Mikail saw Diana and he said... "Weeeewiiittt !"

At least not only Diana was weee-wittt-ed. Whenever he saw someone cute, he'd say, "weeewit" to her. And hey, I got one :) Haha ! XD

Kids are so cute :) Waaaa, I want one !

Assalamualaikum :)

Two days.

2010-11-15T03:44:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

I get jealous easily, I have really low self-esteem, I find it very hard for me to trust anyone and I simply hate the fact that my heart is very fragile. I prayed to Allah to get rid of these feelings for me, I just want to live my young life happily and not bother myself about losing anything but... ya Allah :( Once, in my heart, I wished that I lose all my feelings, sometimes I just want to be heartless, feel nothing. I'm serious, and I'm still wishing. Call me crazy, but I'm so tired of getting hurt, I'm so tired of crying, I'm so tired of feeling sad, I'm so tired of being used and jealousy always hurts the most.
I know I'm not pretty, I know I'm not wise, I know I'm still immature, I know I'm still weak when it comes to religion, I know I'm boring but you have no idea how much I try to improve myself. The least thing you can do is appreciate me, and take care of my feelings. I always take care of yours, but you treat mine like garbage. Gosh, you have no idea how disappointed I am right now. You know what, whatever. I'm done.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Assalamualaikum,

Okay post jiwang di atas tu actually post semalam. So, kalau dah baca habis tu, silalah abaikan :) Tak menarik pun. Aku tahu korang rasa aku ni minah jiwang karat, minah gedik tak bertempat dan apa-apa kan? Okay tak pe tak pe, aku sedar diri aku siapa :)

*Back to English mood*
So today's the last day of school. I was quite pissed that Mary didn't came, I was so looking forward of talking to her and get everything out of my chest.

But alhamdulillah Filzah came, I missed her so much ! It had been quite a long time since I last saw her. Anyways, Filzah and I spent some quality time together, talked and talked. It just kills me knowing that I might not see her next year. Fil, please don't go, I need you to get through that living hell, I need someone that will listen to me and calm me, I need someone that I can bully around (hehe) and someone that I can give advices. Dearrr, please don't go :(

Okay, okay. Stop being jiwang (tak nak korang muntah biru lak). Oh, and during recess, I hung out with Najmi, Filzah, and Faizal. Najmi told me that he also does not like the class *tutttt*. He told me some disgusting story about the class and well, made me went like... "Seriously? How could them? Eeeeee, teruknya perangai ! Serious mcm pookey-mug !"
Besides, it's nice to know that I'm not the only one that thinks that class is full of jerks and not-so-expensive people :) *try nak cakap bahasa yang terbaik*

Okay okay. Bosanlah kutuk dorang. Hey, remember when I said that jamuan 3RK1 dibatalkan? Well, at least today we had the 'jamuan feeling'. For the activities, 3RK1 won like... 7 or something hampers and all of us shared the hampers :) It was fun, with two boys for 3PK3 (I think) that kept on disturbing us (the funny way) and.. I laughed a lot. Finally some time without any activities ( THANK YOU SO MUCH TEACHERS !). I guess I had a nice time because I got what I wanted.

Ya Allah, I cannot believe that school's over already. It feels like only yesterday I stepped in the school as a Form 3 student. Oh how the time flies :)

I guess that's all for now :) Thanks for reading this crap. Assalamualaikum :)

p.s If you think you can use me, forget it. I'm one step ahead.

Hello Nokia C3, bye bye i-Mobile 318

2010-11-13T06:10:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So, today might be one of the happiest day of my life :) Well, this few weeks were boring to me. My old phone had some sort of problems and some of the keypads did not work. I was quite frustrated actually and I begged my daddy for a new phone. At first, he wanted to buy it for me, and he said he'll choose the brand for me. I was like.. "No ! I do not trust you. Pleaseeee, let me choose..pleaseeee..."

I begged and begged so he finally gave up and gave RM400 to buy my own phone. Today, he brought me to Low Yat to get a new phone. I was fascinated by the phones there. We checked and checked and finally we decided to go to the Nokia centre. Yeah, I looked for Nokia C3 and I wanted it so bad ! But in my mind, "oh well, it might cost more than a thousand but what the heck, lets take a look,"

Man, it only cost RM520 ! I was so shocked ! Sure, my dad only gave RM400 but I could add another RM100 and begged him another RM20 :)

Then, we left the Nokia centre and looked at another shop. Sure, there's some cheaper ones but my dad told me that the cheaper ones always getting 'leceh' one day, and my dad told me that the cheaper ones are the seludup ones. Okay then, I cannot afford to have my phone broken down again and begged for new phone, and I decided buy the original Nokia C3 at Nokia Centre.

Now, I'm using Nokia C3 and I'm so happy ! It's the best feeling having your dream phone in your hands.

But I'm gonna miss my old i-mobile 318. Dear, I've been through so much with you, so does Mr.A. We used to complain so much about you. You always disconnect when we're talking. You did not ring when our message came, and sometimes our message did not even get in you. But you kept me company for a long time, and I appreciate you more than I can ever imagine. My treasured messages were still in you as I could not transfer it into the new phone but I won't mind. At least there's some memories in you that will always make me remember you. I will not forget you buddy, love you, muah muah.

So, I guess you're my new friend, Nokia C3. I'm sure we'll have so much fun :) And there's a lot to go through too :) One thing, don't be too hard to handle :)

Bye bye dear, I'm so going to miss you.

Dear Nokia C3, I hope we're going to have so much fun with each other, like I did with i-Mobile :)

p.s Don't call me crazy for talking to phones like talking to people :)

Bye bye, toodles, assalamualaikum :)

Crushed.

2010-11-11T08:11:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum,

Crushed. That's what I feel today. This morning, I was on my Facebook as usual, and Aliff suddenly texted me and told me that 3RK1 feast was cancelled. I was so.. well, mad and sad at the same time. How could they just cancel it at the very last minute?! I want the feast to go on, the whole year is not complete without class feast, that is supposed to be the best event for the class. Serious macam s**t je, I was so looking forward of making the agar-agar for the feast. Now, it's crushed.
My sister told me that only some classes are allowed to do the feast on Monday, as they asked for it earlier. So, the Monday schedule is now fully booked. I was like, "WTF, now we have to BOOK for TIME??!!"
Honestly, I hate my school. So people, kalau ada yang nak pindah ke sini, silalah bertukar fikiran. I'm stucked here, and it's like a total nightmare. Save yourself while you can :)

And I spent most of my time today online-ing. At night, I write my own novel. I discussed with my friends about the novel and now, I'm so excited to write one. They gave me ideas for the names, for the things that can happen in the novel.. gosh, I have the best friends ever :) I love you guys.
Oh, by the way, I was thinking of naming the novel 3RK1: The Journey. What do you think?

Then, I thought again, what sort of drama our class faced this year? Somehow I think there's too much until I lost count of the dramas, and I forgot all about it. I only remember our class drama with class *tuuttttt* tu. Yang lain, ceh, hampeh. So, rasa macam tak sesuai tajuk novel tu kalau drama tu tak melibatkan seluruh kelas kan?

And there's so much things on my mind today. And I realized that I really miss Mr. A :( He hadn't called for quite some time. I know he's busy but.. gosh, I miss his voice so much.

Patience will be the prove of how strong our faith are. Now, I'm not sure if my faith is that strong. I feel like crying, and I promised myself to never cry about him, and be patient in our relationship. But.. I miss him too muchhhhhhhh :(

I gotta go now, nak menangis jap. Assalamualaikum.

Finally.

2010-11-10T07:49:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Alhamdulillah, finally I finished Flowers in the Attic ! Yeah, the book is nice. It was the best company I had in school, so instead of feeling more frustrated with the stupid activities they did in school nowadays, I decided to read a book and ignore the teachers. The best plan I ever came out with :)

Although, today's activities were okay. After recess, they did this pertandingan membalas pantun and 3RK1 got to the finals . Hoyeah ! :) And I'm so happy that 3KE1 got to the finals with us. Bosan ouh asyik compete dengan ES1. At last, we won ! Alhamdulillah :) To Luqman, Ammar and Lukman, you guys did a great job. And to Zuhairi, Faizal and Najmi, you guys too :D It was a very close competition I'd say :D

At home, I basically buried my nose into Flowers in the Attic and before I knew it, I finished it. I'm actually torn between continuing reading the sequel or finding another book to read. Yeah, Flowes in the Attic is nice, but I read the sequel's synopsis and it kinda makes me sad. Goshh, I don't want Christopher to dieeeee !!! But I want to know how do they survive.. grrr, choy, buku pun boleh buat aku pening ouh.

Now, I'm focusing on finding a good book, and creating my own novel. I have to say, my confidence of writing a novel is completely crushed after reading novels. Why? Because somehow I know I'll never write as good as those best-selling authors :(

I guess I have to try, right? I think that's all for today y'all :) Assalamualaikum bye :D

p.s I'm missing him. I'm basically looking at the clock over and over again and waiting for his call. I'm pathetic, right?

TO CLASS TUUTT, I LOATHE YOU.

2010-11-09T00:12:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Gosh, today's not a really good day. Why on earth do I feel frustrated and angry? I feel like screaming so loud right now, err, but I won't. Gosh, taking control of your emotions can be so.. well, hard and it's like you can go insane anytime soon.

Anyways, there's nothing interesting in school today. Sometimes I wonder why do I even care to go to school. The activities are boring, and the management... C R A P. I feel like all my precious time are wasted there. At school, I'm always like.. "FOR GOD'S SAKE CIKGU, LEAVE ME ALONE AND STOP SHOUTING, I'M NOT DEAF YOU *TUUUUTTTTTTTTTT* (mencarut jap) !"
Kepada cikgu yang tak habis-habis menjerit, terpekik terlolong macam orang gila tu, saya tak suka cikgu, saya sikiiiiittt je lagi nak benci cikgu tahu tak? Saya FED-UP dengar cikgu menjerit, boleh pecah gegendang saya mendengar cikgu menjerit, saya penat dengar arahan yang tak konsisten. Saya tak suka dipindahkan ke sana ke mari dan saya dah muak asyik duduk dekat Bengkel Pertanian aje. Grrr, the activities sucks -_- Sorry to say, no offence people, I'm just stating my opinion.

And earlier, we had this activity, with Puan Sri Rahayu. It's called Penulisan Kreatif. It's kinda nice I guess, I mean, I simply adore Puan Sri Rahayu, she's the best teacher I ever had in my life and I have the most respect to her :) My group cracked our brain for ideas and when other people struggled to find AN idea, all of us struggled because we have too much different ideas that is impossible to combine into one.

So we worked hard for our idea and finally we made it. But because of the time, we did not get the chance to present our ideas in front :( I'm okay with that but Elza seemed to think that it's kinda not fair for us. Then, on our way out, she was like, "Tak adil lah..." and some people from 'this' class said "Apa tak adil pulak..." dalam ton suara yang memandang rendah dekat kitorang.

Then, Shida told me that people from 'this' class were like... "Yeay yeay kita menaaaaangggg !!!!" and they're like taunting us for not winning. Gosh, I was so pissed off ! And you know, when Syaf went in front to present her group's idea, they boo-ed her ! I was like, "WTF ! Did I boo your class? DID I ???!!!"

To people from this class, I loathe you. And I mean ALL OF YOU. Ye, ironik kan, disebabkan seorang yang tak seberapa suci, yang menghina kelas aku dalam Facebook, terus satu kelas aku benci. Whatever lah, korang semua, SAMA aje -_-

Kenapa tak ada orang letak bom dalam kelas dorang and biar bom tu letupkan sekali dorang semua? *okay, ni terlalu kejam*

Okay, now I feel so much better. Bye bye :)

Assalamualaikum.

Cooking for the first time.

2010-11-07T02:43:00.000-08:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Hey hey, okay, silalah gelak melihat tajuk di atas. Aku mengaku aku tak reti memasak langsung okay, kecuali masak air dan masak nasi, itu aku dah master dah :D Haha, jangan tanya lebih-lebih, lets proceed to the story okay?

Aku tak tahu kenapa, tapi hari ni mak aku tergerak hati nak ajar aku and adik penyibuk aku tu memasak. Haha, tapi kitorang tukar shift. Adik aku masak untuk makanan tengah hari, aku pula akan masak untuk makan malam :) Okayy, adik aku masak boleh tahan lah. Tak nak puji lebih-lebih so kita skip ke part aku memasak alright? (haha, kakak yang kejam).

So, anyway, masa aku tengah pressure nak siapkan header untuk blog aku (yang tak jadi tu), mak aku panggil suruh aku masak. I was like.. "okay then, bismillah". First-first masak sotong... jap, tu sotong masak apa ekh? Ahhhh, entahlah, aku tahu masak je, tak pernah terfikir nak bagi nama masakan, kuang kuang kuang XD First step : Potong bawang. Ek eleh, senang je en? Okay, aku sebelum ni potong bawang pun tak pernah (FOINE, aku anak MANJA en?) and bila start je potong bawang, dah menangis-nangis. Mak aku gelak punyalah kuat. Aku pun macam.. "Mummy !!! Janganlah gelakkk!!" sambil cuci mata. Wahahaha XD

And then nak masukkan sotong dalam minyak panas tu lagi teruk. Serious aku fobia tengok minyak panas. Ye lah, aku pernah mimpi, ada orang tengah nak masukkan makanan dalam minyak panas, tetiba minyak tu meletup macam bom nuklear dekat muka dia. Daaah, habis tak cantik muka dia lepas tu. Eh, kalau jadi real life macam mana?? WAAAAAAAA !! Tapi tak jadi pun, muka aku still suci macam biasa (wahaaa, perasan).

And then masak sayur, okay, yang ni senang sangat. Tak payah ceritalah. Next, PALING SUSAH : masak ikan goreng. Hahahaa , fineee, korang dah master en? Masak ikan goreng tu kacang ke en? Haha, aku pula, kecut tengok minyak yang menggelegak tu. Tapi akhirnya jadi :) Entah macam mana ikan tu boleh masak elok, aku pun tak tahu, tapi yang penting, tak hangus. Kalau hangus, haha, aku akan paksa juga family aku makan. Membazir tu dosa tahu?

Oh, here's some pictures :

Sotong masak... tak tahu :) Kalau nampak tak sedap.. err, salahkan kamera aku ekh? HAHAHA XD

Sayur-sayuran :) Hahahaha XDD

Yeee, itulah pengalaman pertama aku memasak :) Adik aku naik bengang sebab nanti, ayah aku dapat rasa masakan aku, and tak rasa masakan dia :DD Hahaha, itulah, yang kau masak tengah hari apahal? Ayah aku balik for dinner sahaja. Muahahahaha XD

Okay okay, aku stop sekarang okay? Thanks for readingggg :DD

Assalamualaikum.

What the.. waa ! comel gila budak ni !

2010-11-06T07:50:00.000-07:00

What the.. wehh, comel gila budak ni :) Aku nak anak macam dia boleh tak? (haha, kecik-kecik lagi dah fikir nak anak, gatal ouh Syahirah ni) HAHA XD

Fell in love with Christopher Doll

2010-11-06T07:04:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

Haha, cute quotes huh? Man, I realized that it's been a while since I last watched Spongebob Squarepants :) Yeah yeah, I know I'm childish for liking cartoons like this but well, I'm still young, and actually, I do not want to grow up -_- Grown up world seems to be so cruel, so dark, so challenging.. I'd rather be a kid forever, and just lie down in my room, and do my own things, safe from the evil world outside (pengaruh Flowers in the Attic la ni kot).

Okay okay, fine, katalah aku mengarut ke apa, whatever, macamlah aku kisah. Anyway, gosh today seems to be a very boring day. I woke up at 6.50 a.m, yeah, almost missed my Subuh prayers. Then I went back to sleep until 12 something. I did not enjoy my sleep at all. Yeah, I'm sleepy but I have no idea why I had dreams about people dying, and man, that was depressing. But I was so relieved knowing that it's all a bad dream. Then I went back to sleep and I was in a fashion show? What the.... Grrr, crazy dreams -_-

So I spent most of my time drawing and reading. People, I managed to draw a very beautiful horse and deer :) Alhamdulillah, I could not believe I did that :D And I almost finished my Flowers in the Attic. Weh, this might sound crazy but I totally fall in love with Christopher Doll :) And now, I'm depressed knowing that he'll die in the forth book, Seeds of Yesterday, in a car accident :( Poor Cathy.. Waaaaaa !!! *crying my eyes out*

Okay kay, skip until dinner. I had dinner at Delifrance (betul ke aku eja) ? And I ordered something baked rice and it was delicious ! Yeah, it was fatty as it was rice baked with cheese and chicken added with some mushroom but still.. :) oh, and I even got a free ice-cream. Haha, bertambah gemuk la kau Syahirah -_-

Haihh, gosh, I miss my Mr.A :( *eh, tetiba puloks*

Okay, I guess that's all for now. Gotta find an intro for Iqraq's movie. I have no idea how am I gonna find it but still, I'll try. Gosh, things you'd do for your friends -_- Oh by the way, to Ayam Dara Family, I miss you guys !!!!

Assalamualaikum :)

25 random things about me

2010-11-05T09:49:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Okay, I was tagged by Miss Nyna. Hee, sorry for sebab lambat buat. Sebelum ni asyik terlupa aje, hari ni baru teringat ada tag tak buat-buat lagi :)

Once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, fact, habits or goal about you. In the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

Things/facts/habits/goal about me :

- Allah is my God and Muhammad is His messenger. I am His slave, not yours. I believe in Muhammad, not in you.

- I simply hate it when people misspell my name. Spell it right people ! It's SYahirah binti Hazidi. Not Shahirah binti Hazidi. Alright?

- I hate my sister. She's annoying and I hate, hate her.

- I cannot eat too much chocolate or sweets, I will puke if I do. The only candies that I can eat a lot are M&M and Smarties :)

- I love to do blogwalking but some blogs are too annoying. Some are too 'heavy', some are too 'noisy' and lots more. Those are the kind of blogs that turn my mood off.

- I am a pink hater. Woot woot :) I do not understand other girls who love pink. Girls, open your eyes, pink is ugly. Ergh.

- I LOVE English. So what my English sucks? Duhh, like I care. I've come a lot since my first experience with English language so I am very proud of it.

- I love my friends. Hurt them and I'll hurt you.

- I hate it when people judge without knowing much about the things they're judging. For example : People thinks my class is arrogant, but man, we're the ones that's arrogant, or you? What, you think you're so famous and you want us to talk to you first? You want to be friends, you make the move first lah !

- I am NOT racist. Err, okay maybe just a bit. But seriously, everyone is. All of us care more about our race than other races right?

- I am very insecure about my weight so NEVER ask how much I weight.

- Maryleen and Filzah are my dearest friends :)

- I love my Ayam Dara Family. Girls, Mak Dara miss you olls (haha, tergedik pulak)

- I hate the blogs that's like.. well, too desperate for traffic. Seriously, begging for people to come to your blog, sulking when you traffic's down, grr, so not cool. Gedik ouh, sumpah tak suka.

- I love Nando's, Kenny Rogers and Manhattan Fish Market.

- I do not trust guys that easily nowadays.

- I hardly talk to strangers. Call me sombong but I gotta take care of myself.

- Mr.A is the best guy in my life. I love him so dearly and God knows how much I would sacrifice for him.

- I am a prefect since I was Standard 5. Why am I a prefect until now? Because I love the blue outfit :) White outfit will not look that good on me :)

- I simple adore tall and broad shouldered guys :)

- Adam Lambert, Mark Feehily and Neil Patrick Harris are my biggest crush :) Yeah, I have taste for gays
-_-

- Shah Rukh Khan and Arjun Rampal are my favourite Bollywood stars.

- I will not stay quiet when people say bad things about me. I will strike back :)

- I am original. I will not try to be another person. God made me unique and I will stay unique.

- Most of all, I love being me :)

25 person to be tagged? Oh I don't know. Now I'm too tired to do that. I decided to not tag anyone. Yeah :D

I guess I'll stop now :) Goodnight everyone ! Sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite !

Flowers in the Attic

2010-11-05T09:16:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum !

Hi people ! Again, I'm writing in the middle of the night :) Anyways, today's a very boring day. I basically spent most of my time reading a book entitled 'Flowers in the Attic' that was given to me by my mother. Yeah, at first the book looked very dull and uninteresting but after a few chapters, I find it kinda interesting and I actually skipped a few chapters just to see what will happen next (serious tk sabar).

Reading the ending, I was like... "Oh mannn" *depressed*. But I could not stop from feeling that Christopher and Catherine belong together eventhough they shouldn't be. Why? Oh, they're siblings -_- Can't blame them tho, after quite some years being locked up in the attic, reached their puberty there and after some time, they became sexually attracted to each other. Man, that's so wrong and this story's so dark. Not to mention near the end, Christopher raped Cathy in a jealous rage after knowing she kissed her mother's new husband.

I simply hate the mother and grandmother. Who in the right mind would lock 4 innocent children up in the attic??!! B*tches, I cursed so hard reading the book (yeah yeah, this book is not a good influence for me, so?) but I cannot stop reading it ! I know I'm depressed and feels so dark after reading this book but somehow this book keeps me feel like wanting to know more. Man, V.C Andrews is such a good writer -_-

Anyways, they made a movie for this film and I watched the trailer. Then I watched a fan made video for Christopher and Cathy :) Oh goshh, they really look good together and dayummmm, Christopher is hot. Watch it, you'll see what I mean :D

This is a very good book, no wonder it sold over millions of copies. Gosh, I wanna write like this, I wanna write a story that keep people wanting more, I wanna write stories that make people crazy for it, I wanna write the best book in history but... can I?

I'll stop now. See ya later, assalamualaikum :D

Today's story and a night at Jusco Taman Maluri

2010-11-04T09:36:00.000-07:00

Missing those romantic moments :(

Assalamualaikum,

Whoa, I think this is the first time I write my post in the middle of the night :) Wahaha, gosh it feels different. I usually post during the day, or before midnight. And usually, there's always my nosy sister that suddenly comes into my room and disturb me but now.. she's asleep (hoyeah) :DD

Tomorrow's Deepavali.. err, right? Gosh, I really do not know this public holiday. I was always like, "Tomorrow's holiday? Okay then" and never ask "What for?" Oh well, Happy Deepavali to everyone that's celebrating it :)

Anyways, what did I do today? Well, almost.. nothing. Woke up in the morning, had my breakfast, messing around with my mom, helped her cleaning the room and well.. that's pretty much it. Oh yeah, I'm going to move to a new room ! Away from my sister ! Yeahh, finally. A room that I can lock myself in and hear nothing except loud music (haih, pekaklah aku nanti). The best of all, I can have my own privacy, a room where I can study until midnight, without my sister complains about turning off the light. Hoyeah I can't wait.

So we decided to change the study room into my room but the room's too messy and there's too much to take care off ! Oh no !! Grrrr, oh my my.. now my house is a complete mess. Tetamu-tetamu yang mahu datang mengunjungi kami, sila jangan datang. Nanti kena heart attack tengok rumah kami nanti, saya tak mahu bertanggungjawab.

I had McD for my dinner today and daddy bought Hanis and I ice-creams :) At first, she decided to take the Sundae instead. But then she saw the person in front of us got a very tall flavor twist ice-cream and she instantly changed her mind. Rakus punya budaks -_-

Cakap pasal budak, I saw a group of mini-shufflers in McD earlier. Man, they're so young and cute but they tried so hard to become like teenagers. Oh babies, don't be. When you're a teenager, you would want to become little kids again.
Oh, and one of the kids are not like others. While the others wore caps and jackets, high caps and sneakers, this boy wore only jeans, red t-shirt and sandals. At first, I thought he's alone, and he sat alone too. Ate his own double cheeseburger and kept on looking behind like he's waiting for someone. After he finished with his food, he joined the mini-shuffler group that's obviously having so much fun together. I felt so sorry for that boy. He's completely been 'palau' by his friends :( But he looked so happy that they let him join them. Cruel boys I would say.

Oh yeah, my sister and I was completely hyper after eating the ice-cream. We talked, I palau her and we laughed so hard.. Then I felt someone patted my shoulder. I turned around and saw Jaiho. Oh-kayy, I then smiled, said hi and just went away (sengal kan? Kesian dia). Aduii, banyak-banyak orang kenapa jumpa dia ekk? Tak bolehkah nak jumpa Arjun Rampal ke, Mark Feehily ke, Adam Lambert ke... Ni dia.. alahai -_-

Gosh I'm such a bad person :(

I guess I talked too much already. I better go now. Goodbye everyone !

Assalamualaikum.

p.s You called and I realized how I miss you so deeply. I love you much and it kills me that we can only talk for only a few minutes now. Baby, do you remember the time when we talked for hours? Dearest, I miss that moment.

Public Speaking and Banner

2010-11-03T01:26:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

Oh yeah, today's a fun day :) I guess I made a good choice coming to school anyway.

At school today, they gathered us at the library. We did not know what activity will be held so we just sat there and talked with friends. Out of the blue, teacher told us that public speaking activity will be held today. I was like.. owwwkayyy, like I'm going to participate, pffttt. Then, teacher told me that I WAJIB masuk activity ni and I was like.. "What the heck ! Teacherrrr ! Don't want tooo !!" but as usual, aku mesti kena palau. Isk2 *touching*

Eeee, seriously, I've never done any public speaking before ! Allah knows how terrified I was. After that, teacher gave us our numbers and all of us picked our topics. I hoped for easy topics and in my heart, "Dear Allah, please.. give me easy topics.. like.. Facebook. Yeah, please Allah, I want Facebook as my topic, please..pleasee"

Then, teacher gave me my topic and guess what? I got Facebook as my topic ! Alhamdulillah ! I felt like dancing and singing "Hoyeah, hoyeahhh" in front of the people but I didn't do it, no worries, haha :)

I guess it went quite good. Maryleen told me, my classic line during my speech "Namun begitu, Facebook juga mempunyai keburukannya. Antaranya adalah sesetengah pihak mencetuskan pergaduhan dengan menulis status yang menyinggung pihak orang lain dan sengaja cari pasal". Haha, Mary told me that budak-budak kelas *tutttttt* serious nampak bengang. Haha, terasakah? Well, like Farah said, "Siapa makan cili, dialah terasa pedasnya," right?

Oh well, in the end, I got second place :) The first place goes to Ammar.

The activity after recess was banner creating. Oh gosh, it was messy fun ! :D We took a VERY long time to do the drawing and it took longer time for us to finish colouring. It was a mess but my group was very helpful and we worked together... guys, I'm very proud of you :) Oh man, I'm the messy one there, sooo unlike Shida, who was very careful. Haha, I saw her quite pissed at me for messing with the colours :( Sorry Shidaaaaa...

In the end, we got second place. ES1 beat us for the first place ~~ciss~~. Haha, but it doesn't matter :) We had so much fun, Mary and Elza were very sengal and could not stop disturbing me (Elza, wait for my revenge). Our banner was beautiful, and I'm very proud of it :)

Overall, today's a fun day and I had the best of times :) I'll stop now, see you guys later !

Assalamualaikum :)

Tak tahu nak bagi tajuk apa, haha :)

2010-11-01T03:31:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Today I realize my Maths skills are completely rusty. Before PMR, I used to do a lot of Maths and well, not to brag, but I'm proud that I'm finally good at it after 9 months of trying. Alhamdulillah. PMR's Maths was easy and I'm really happy with that. But then, after PMR, I haven't done any Maths exercises and after some time, it all got rusty and I almost forget everything.

Like today, there's sukaneka Matematik. They all got me to join, and I forced Maryleen to join me. Then, there's also Dhanusya, Chin and Ting joining us, the power people of Mathematics so I was so damn excited. Knowing that there's Dhanusya, I was confident we can do this :) Then, the first activity require us to blow the balloon until it pecah and then ran toward another station to do the Maths questions in 5 minutes. Okay, I have no idea how to blow a balloon so I was so afraid when it's my turn. It was hard at first and I panicked but then, thank Allah, I managed to do it, yeay !

Then, I had to do this activity, where I had to eat a green apple and answer the questions after it finished. Grrr, jatuh saham den. I had to eat it in front of the guys and oh man, serious lahap je aku makan epal tu. Jatuh saham jatuh saham.

After recess, there's supposed to be some sort of ceramah but the tukang penceramah tak datang, and ada aktiviti lain sebagai ganti. It was fun I guess. Especially when teacher asked every group to send in the person in each group that has the softest voice. Well, you might guess that every group sent in girls to represent their groups but you're wrong. There's also boys. And when teacher told them to do, "Abang.. Sayang... Bolehlahh" to the other guy who will be sitting on a chair, it was weird. Yeah, it sounded sooo gay and I laughed so hard, everybody did :)

Then, we're supposed to meet some people in 'that' class but none of them showed up. I was .. not surprised actually. Great people, cool people will show up bila dah janji nak jumpa, apatah lagi jika mereka sendiri yang minta nak jumpa, bukankah begitu? Well, lame people will not do that, and they will not show up walaupun mereka sendiri yang kata nak jumpa. Ya, I should've known that I'm dealing with lame people so yeah, we're cool ~~ Maleh den nak gaduh :)

But it's nice hanging out with my friends after school when those people didn't show up. It's been a longgg time since I last hang out with them. Huuh :')

I guess I talked too much already. Goodbye everybody :D Assalamualaikum.

Dumb, dumb, dumb

2010-10-29T02:32:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Well, even with ES1 drama yesterday, I still decided to come to school today and saw SHIDA !! Gosh, serious rasa macam lama gila tak jumpa cik adik manis ni :) Kinda miss her actually. And then, Mary came and we gossiped about *ehem ehem* and well, I don't remember anything else. Then, teacher called everyone and gathered us at the canteen, she told us to sit next to the ES1 students. I was like, oh gosh, balik-balik muka ni juga ke? Seriously, I have no idea why I cannot be cool with them. I mean, I am actually tired of saying bad things about them. It actually made me feel like a bad person (but I know I'm not, haha) and well, they're so lame, and fighting with lame people are so not cool. Besides, I agree with Iqraq. RK1 cool en? Buat apa nak gaduh dengan budak-budak hingusan? So, big thanks to Iqraq for making me realize that :D

Anyways, the first activity today was Nilam. They made us sit in the library and read, and write at least 4 books in Nilam. It was okay I guess. I mean, I want to complete 300 books by the end of August next year. Fareezuan was so chatty in library, and he told me that he's thinking of going to SBU next year. I just smile but I was actually really bumped. Come on, there's too much nice people are going away next year. Somehow I think next year is going to be so dull. Okay, now I'm depressed. Guys, please don't move away. I'm really going to miss you guys. What am I going to do without you?

After recess, teacher Zaleha gave us free Celcom number. Yeah, it was nice, but.. what am I going to do with it actually? I'm already happy with my Maxis number, postpaid lagi :) Oh, and earlier, Fareezuan and Maryleen said something about Mr.A that really made me sad. Oh gosh, this is really hard. Dear Mr.A, if you're reading this, just know, everything's so hard for me right now. I need you now but where are you? You promised to be with me through thick and thin right? Erm, what am I doing? Of course you're busy but.. uh, I just need you. Will it kill you to call me for even 5 minutes? I miss you so much :'( But, no sweat. Take your time, don't bother about me.

Oh, Mary and I helped Puan Zaleha to collect teacher's signature after recess. Gedik ouh Mary tu ! Sikit-sikit nak pergi blok baru, sikit-sikit blok baru. And being the best friend in the entire world (ceh, perasan), I just followed her around. Fineee, she got to see her KO. Wahaha, and he looked at her ! And grrr, that girl, menggedik nak tengok mamat tu, tapi bila mamat tu pandang, bukan nak tengok balik. Sure, cannot blame her too, KO's friend was teasing her , "Ala malu pulak, nak couple dengan dia ke?" , "Eleh malu pulak" ... and KO was staring at Mary like.. well, I can't describe the look but it was so funny :) I tried my very best not to laugh ! Mary was as giddy as a school girl :)

After we completed the job, we went back to SPBT room, where Puan Marianna was taking signature too from a teacher there.

She said to me, "Okay, jap, cikgu cop dulu cikgu ni ! "
I was like, "Alah cikgu, cikgu ni tak ajar kitorang lah. Dah complete pun !"
Teacher was like.. " Ouh, haha, malu je. Dah ambil semua tandatangan?"
I said "Semua cikgu dah, tinggal cikgu Zaleha je"
and teacher said "Aaah ! tak de, tak complete lah tu ! Yeay ! Cikgu siap dulu ! "
I said "Ape ni cikguu ! Cikgu Zaleha suruh saya, jadi dia tak kira lah. "

And teacher ignored me. Boleh pula cikgu nak lawan dengan aku siapa siap dulu? Haha, whatever it is, Teacher Marianna won (cis!) HAHAHA XD

Oh yeah, then we helped Zulaikha, Yuhaidah and Miss J.Alexander/Jaiho to arrange the new books. Grr, Jaiho was sooooo annoying ! She wanted to do this thing, while the rest of us were trying to finish another. Come on la woman, tak pernah dengar tentang teamwork ke? Then, bila dah bengang, we all sang Jaiho by Pussycat Dolls but we only sang the part 'Jaihoooooo' but Zulaikha went all the way and said "You are my destiny, JAIHOOOOOO!!!"

I was like, "Seriously Zue? Jaiho's your destiny?" and I jeling at Jaiho. And Zue was like.. "Ewwwww !!" and both of us laughed soooo hard ! It was so funny :) Mary and Yuyu were confused but Zue and I laughed to hard to even talk. Oh gosh, this is not good *slaps myself*. Okay, back to real world. I almost yelled at Jaiho ouh,

I said "WEH ! Benda ni tak siap lagi kau nak siapkan yang tu apahal? Satu-satu lahhh !!!"
And she was like "Seriously, aku dah cuba siapkan yang ni.. susahhh. Jomlah siapkan ni dulu"
I said "Ah tak de ! Kau duduk skang, siapkan yang ni dulu..hish !"

Haha, garang tak garang tak? Gosh, I'm trying to be nice to her but she annoyed me so much that I got fed-up and almost yelled at her. Guys, am I being a terrible person? Am I turning into a.. satan? Okay that's too much. I mean.. am I turning into a b**ch? Weh, tak nakkkkkkkk !! Aku nak jadi baik ! Tapi bila berdepan dengan Jaiho, Lextra or ES1, segala benda tak jadi , kenapa? Susah benar nak kawal emosi ouh.. :( haihh

Okay, I guess that's all for today :) See you guys later, byeeee :)

Assalamualaikum.

p.s Huuh, perasaan aku bercelaru ouh. Marah, sedih, rindu, sayang, benci semua bercampur. Nak buat macam mana ekk?

Over the limits

2010-10-28T03:13:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

There's a lot of people that I care a lot in my life. My family, Mr.A, and my friends and classmates are in the top of the list. They are the ones that I love the most, and when people hurt them, they hurt me too. I am very protective when it comes to them, so when people hurt them, I will not stay quiet. Yeah people, you do not want to mess with Syahirah Hazidi.

For those who have been following this blog for a while, you'll know that I really hate this one class. Yeah, I guess it's time to let people know what class is it. Yeah, it's totally ES1. I know I'm a total jerk for saying bad stuff behind their back but seriously, I'm still sane, and I have my reasons. Since last year, RK1 faced tons of criticism because of them. It's no longer a secret that last year, they got soalan bocor for Science and no wonder they can get higher marks than us. And because we're RK1, everyone wonders why couldn't we get higher marks? Until this year, everyone compared us to them. It hurts you know? And some people in that class are so... well, I have no nice words to say about them so lets skip that word. Macam-macam weh, macam-macam kitorang kena. Siapa tak marah? Siapa tak bengang? Asal salah sikit je, compare dengan ES1, salah sikit je, ES1. Macam tak ada kelas lain lagi dah. Macam tak ada contoh yang lagi baik lagi dah. Honestly, I think there's tons of good examples they can give us, other than ES1.

Today, I read this on my Facebook. See it for yourself :

Seriously, I was so angry that my hands were shaking. For the first time I could not control my anger. Weh, bila masa kitorang meniru? And jealous? Well, for the choir, yes. Is it wrong to say that you guys are better for choir? Is it wrong? Well if that so, I won't be complimenting you guys anymore ! And WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO SAY OUR MODELS CONTROL CUN??! Heyh, bukan control cunlah, tahu malu je. Hish, I did not even say anything bad about Erni before this, and you said that about Munie and Filzah? Hey, don't you think that's a little bit over the limits?

Sumpah rasa macam nak mencarut tadi. Well, I guess I reached my limits. I cannot stand it anymore. As much as I hate ES1, they still have a point. Apa kes kutuk-kutuk belakang en? Yeah, that's so right. You're so smart en? From now on, if you guys piss me off, you guys will be 'featured' in this blog. Because well, before this, you guys do made me angry, uh-LOT and I did not mention you guys because I did not want to embarrass you guys. Yeah, you guys made it clear for me that I should not keep this thing a secret anymore. Well, for that, I thank you. And I appreciate that you guys made me feel so much better that I don't have to be so secretive anymore.

We're RK1, we're still sane, we're not crazy. And if we're not satisfied with you guys, we obviously have our reasons. Tak pernah terfikir nak tanya kenapa ke sebelum korang kutuk iye iye bukan? Kitorang kena kutuk all year long, korang baru kena sikit dah nak kecoh macam ni. Not cool yo, not cool ~~

Message to RK1 AND RK2 = Guys, we're so much cooler than them.

Assalamualaikum.

Today totally rocks !

2010-10-27T03:40:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So I had a great day at school today :) It was crazy fun and my friends somehow were crazier today (hantu apa rasuk dorang entah). I reached school around 7.15 a.m and across the road, I saw Miss J.Alexander coming. I was like.. "Oh gosh, I'm not in the mood to talk to her," and I speed up. Then, I heard someone called my name from behind, it was Fara. Oh, nice timing. I quickly grabbed her and both of us got into school together. We walked quite fast though, both of us wanted to avoid our 'beloved' Miss J.Alexander. Too much to handle early in the morning. I know it's bad, but ... seriously, she's too annoying to talk to early in the morning.

The first activity was makeup competition :) They gave the contestants one hour to makeup their models so since Filzah, Mary and I did not participate, we just sat and talked. It was damn fun :) Well, it was, until Miss J.Alexander came and joined us. All of us were very uncomfortable with her but.. well, you can't expect us to tell her to go away right? So, we let her stay but we ignored her, not completely though. I did not even look at her but I still talked to her.. Mary.. jangan cakaplah.. but Filzah's still the nice one to talk to her and look at her, even though it's clear that she's trying her best to get away from her.

I taught Filzah how to catwalk today :) Haha, don't laugh, shut up ! It's very hard you know? She's very stiff! But she got better and I could not get any happier seeing my student evolved into better model *tears of joy*

Then Mary, Filzah and I talked about models and how to pose... I seriously watched too much America's Next Top Model, as now I know what to do, what not to do, how to walk and all that. But.. well, sometimes I think I can only talk but I cannot demonstrate. Well, I can be a good model if I have the shape of a model instead of the shape of an elephant, duhh. Sometimes I envy Miss J.Alexander (the real one). I mean, he's a guy, but he walks better than me. And ~~she's~~ he's a runway coach !!

Anyways, here's some pictures :

Err, I'm too lazy to upload other pictures here but you can check it out in my Facebook page :) Anyways, after that, recess ! Haha, it was crazy fun. We took pictures, and then, the Form 4 came out for recess. Of course, we saw the exchange student, Dennis. All of the sudden, Ardila shouted, "Dennis ! Picture, picture !!" and she took the picture of Dennis. As she was using my camera, I was quite embarrassed. All of them were shouting and screaming when Dennis agreed to take pictures. Well, they planned to take pictures of Dennis, only Dennis, tapi adalah sorang minah ni menyibuk, sampai jadi mcm ni..

Then Dennis went away with his friends, and we laughed so hard. But then he came back and guess what happened? Here's what happened :

Haha, ada je minah yang menyibuk ouh :) Seriously, I was quite jealous. Well, I want to take pictures with someone who's BLONDE too -_- Tak kisahlah handsome ke tak, yang penting rambut warna blonde, boleh tak? HAHAHAHAHA XD

Then, it's fashion show. I joined Farah, Zulaikha, Filzah, Munie and Nita :) Not for the fashion show, I just menyibuk kat sana. Farah and Zulaikha were responsible in makeup-ing Munie and Filzah, the models of 3RK1 :) What were Nita and I doing there? Haha, I don't know.

But then, suddenly Munie had cold feet. Suddenly she felt like giving up, and let Filzah do all the modelling alone. So, when the other girls changed clothes, and wore their tudung, we're still there, trying to convince Munie to enter the competition anyway. I have no idea how but somehow we managed to convince her (yeay us!)

Munie and Filzah were BEAUTIFUL. I still think they should've won the competition instead. Here's a picture of them :

Cantik kan? Tengoklah kawan siapa kan... (muka bangga)

Fareezuan won the competition. Well, he deserved it :) He dressed as the Malay version of Adam Lambert. Here's him :

Oh, and I took pictures with him too ! *berangan jumpa Adam Lambert konon*

I guess that's the last picture for today :) Yeah, I took lots of pictures, gila kamera hari ni :) Anyways, I had a fun day today and I wish everyday's like this. But I will not be coming to school tomorrow. Boring activities : Sukaneka and gotong-royong. Haha, jangan mimpi aku nak dtg. By the way, Mr. Faiz Zarif, tomorrow's still on right?

I'll stop now :) Goodbye everyone ! Assalamualaikum :D

I'm engaged and getting married soon, yeay !

2010-10-25T23:24:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So I did not come to school today (yeay !) Actually, I did plan to go to school today but.. Okay, this is a funny story actually. Yesterday, I was at my opah chu's house in Batu Gajah. Everyone's paying their attention to me. Well, since my red letter day's coming, they should :) Then my opah came to me and showed me the baju kurung I'm going to wear for my majlis pertunangan :) HAHA. Eh, seriously lah.

It was beautiful :) The colour of the dress was brown (ceh, warna favourite siapa lah tu) and I simply loved it ! I could not wait for my wedding day ! Yeay ! Oh goshh, I did not get the chance to try that dress as my aunt took me upstairs and told me to get some sleep. I could not sleep, I could not stop thinking about my future husband. Gosh, he's going to look really great during our majlis pertunangan, and I could not wait to see him. I'm sure he's missing me too. Awww ♥ I could not believe we're going to get married in few days :)

I was so happy, and excited. Then, I heard someone's saying "Iraaaa, bangun, sekolah!" Waaaa, it's just a dream??!! Grrr, it was frustrating actually (tak sabar sangat nak kahwin ke Syahirah?) Huuh, whatever, I was so frustrated, then I curled up in my blanket and decided not going to school. Haha, I know that's one stupid reason but.. waaa, I got my hopes so high, and I was very sure my Mr.A is going to look good in his brown baju Melayu. Ah, sudahlah. Insya-ALLAH that day will come :)

So that dream did not continue. I woke up late anyway, had lunch and took my shower, then sent my sister to school. It was quite weird getting into school with jeans and black T-shirt while every one was wearing their usual uniform. Haha, forget that, I tebalkan muka and jalan je. Then, I went up to Puan Zaleha's desk and sent in my koko book (datang sekolah 5 minit sebab nak hantar tu je).
Then, I saw some of the budak petang looked at me like I'm some kind of weirdo. I was like, "Dow, tak pernah tengok orang pakai t-shirt dgn jeans ke?"

On my way home, I stopped at the grocery shop and bought some ice-cream. Yeah, it's so true that ice-cream can make you less frustrated about the sweet dream that's very unlikely to happen again.

I just hope I can have that dream again. I was so in love, so pretty (ceh, perasan) and.. well, I just love the attention I got as future bride :) Eh wait, come to think of it, I hope it's not just a dream, I hope it will come true :) And to my dearest Mr.A, is it going to be you? I hope it is ♥

Assalamualaikum :)

Extreme dislikes

2010-10-25T08:04:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

Okay, so I finally hate school. I think I said this tons of times before, but I wanna say it again. SCHOOL IS BORING. Dear teachers, pleaseeee, just let us be in our own classes and do nothing, instead of you guys, pushing us around, telling us to go here and there and bore us to death with those speeches and all sorts, puh-leaseee teacher, LEAVE US ALONE.

Today's story : Well, the first activity was sukaneka. I didn't play :) I played Truth or Dare with the girls instead. I know this is a bad thing to say but OH MY GOSH, THAT GIRL REALLY PISSES ME OFF ! Who is she? Starts with J, 3RK2. Hishh, she annoyed the crap out of me. I was about to ask a question, she cut me off and asked her question instead. I was about to say something, she cut me off and made some stupid joke, which was not funny at all. So, I took my revenge. I asked her some questions, sizzling questions. Some of them are :

Hey ________, kau rasa baru-baru ni ramai tak orang macam mengelakkan kau?
Hey ________, kau rasa perangai kau tu, apa yang paling orang tak suka?
Hey ________, kau lebih rela orang baik depan kau tapi mengumpat belakang kau, or kau lebih suka orang palau kau terus?

I just hope she gets the hidden meaning in those questions. What's the hidden meaning? Obvious, I DO NOT LIKE HER AND CANNOT STAND A SIGHT OF HER.

Then when she went away for a little while, Zuriah and I was soooooo relieved but then she came back. We were like... " My God.. *muka malas nak layan dan cepat-cepat tukar jadi muka baik* "

I think only Hasanah and Farah Nur Aina can stand her, they seemed to not care that much. By the way, I almost puked when J said that she's too sensitive -_- Uh puh-lease, if you're really that sensitive, you should realize by now that I'm actually hurt by your actions cutting me off when I'm talking. If it's once, it's alright. But it's more than once, and you didn't apologize !

Erghh, I sometimes I wish I can just korek keluar biji mata dia yang berjambul tu. Grrrr !

I don't want to hate anyone, really. I want to become a better person, inside. Ya Allah, why is it so hard? Why do I have to deal with someone like her every day? Allahuakbar, whatever You're doing, make me stronger. I have no idea if I can fake another smile in front of her.

Talk about dislikes, my sister said that Lextra mini started to act like Lextra. I was like.. "Well, siblings are alike sometimes". Then today, she told me that Lextra mini is hated by the whole class, and turns out, she's not very fond of my sister too. My sister (aka Kak Bob) said that her friend told her that Lextra mini wants to create a club, ANTI my sister. Gosh, my Kak Bob was really pissed. Yo sis (pertama kali aku mengaku kau adik dalam blog, haha) , dia nak ikut jejak kaki abang dialah, relaks la :D Kau nak ikut jejak kaki aku, kau duduk diam-diam, jangan cari pasal dengan orang.

Haha, I guess I talked too much already. Goodbye everyone :) Assalamualaikum.

p.s Tak boleh post gambar hari ni, Blogger buat hal. Subhanallah -_- *sabar, sabar*

Alahai mak nyah..

2010-10-24T03:03:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Oh my gosh, today's so boring. As usual, I wake up and had my breakfast. Today, I watched How I Met Your Mother and yeah, I realized that it's now my favourite sitcom on TV :) Totally replaced Friends. Anyways, then I looked at the clock and I was like.... "OMG ! Mom ! It's 12 o'clock already? And I just woke up?"
My mom was like.. "No no, don't pretend that you're surprised. You always wake up this late"
Ya Allah, really? *anak dara mithali sungguh*

Then, she told me to get ready as my dad will come from his work to take us for lunch. Hu ha hu ha, he took us for a lunch at Restoran Selera Utara in Pandan Indah. As we went there quite late, most of my favourite lauk were finished. After taking my food and took my seat, I glanced at the people there and saw something that really put a question in my mind, "Ya Allah, are those guys or girls?"

I didn't realize I said that out loud, but my sister said, "Neither, those are bitches"
I was like.. "Since when this little kid know how to curse?"

I asked why she called them that. She said that those mak nyahs blocked her way when she's taking her food and talked with their friends in front of the food my sister's taking like she's not even there. My sister was so pissed off and just walked away from there. I told her, "Why don't you just tell them to eff off?". My sister kept quiet when I asked her that.

My sister really could not keep her mouth shut. She simply said it out loud "MENYAMPAH AKU DENGAN PONDAN-PONDAN TU!" when the mak nyahs were near us. I was like, "Yo ! Shuhhh!! You want them to listen?" and she was likeeee, "WHY DO YOU CARE ABOUT WHAT THE PONDAN THINKS?? PONDAN!"

I simply thank Allah that the mak nyahs didn't heard that. Or.. well.. you know how mak nyahs like when people call them.. pondan, they'll pick up a fight. Oh goshh, I cannot imagine them fighting with my sister -_-

I observed the mak nyahs and I realized something. Even though they're guys, I simply envy them for having much better body. Seriously, look at them ! Some of them look much more beautiful than real woman, even if they look completely fake. And one of those mak nyahs I saw, was wearing hot pink shirt and skinny jeans, I simply envy him/her as I can't wear those outfits :(

On our way home, I asked my dad "Dada, kalaulah mak nyah ni, dia dah buat pembedahan semua, and dari segi fizikal, dia macam perempuan, perlukah dia pakai telekung bila nak sembahyang?" Haha, stupid question right?
Then I asked him, why on Earth these mak nyahs want to be mak nyahs. Well, they're attention seekers. My dad said, when you're a guy, and you want to be the center of attention, you need to be more brutal and really push your way through. But then, these people, cannot do that and try to immitate a woman. Actually, they do not act like woman. They simply act like how men see women. Observe how mak nyahs behave, then you'll see how guys actually see girls.

I have no idea why they can't just be satisfied by who they are. Allah made us the best we could ever be, why change it?

Tepuk dada, tanyalah selera :)

Assalamualaikum :D

The Only One :)

2010-10-23T09:06:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

When I first used the Internet, I was quite naive. I have no idea what site is useful for me, or what site is fun or all sorts. The only site that I knew was Youtube. So, I spent most of my time there, browsing through the videos and lots more. I remembered watching a fan video, made for Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson, and the music they used was I Lay My Love on You by Westlife. Ya Allah, that music captured my heart completely and I quickly searched for it.

"I lay my love on you, it's all I wanna do, everytime I breathe I feel brand new. You opened up my heart, show me all your love and walk right through, as I lay my love on you :) "

I completely fell in love with Westlife :D Shane Filan, Mark Feehily, Nicky Byrne, Brian McFadden, and Kian Egan... totally HOT :D I melted, yeahh. Since then, I listened to their songs, downloaded every single one of them and well, before I know it, I'm a fanatic! You know, once I dreamed of getting married with Mark Feehily but at the same time has an affair with Kian Egan? haha, stupid right? But then I know Mark Feehily is gay and Kian Egan is not single... totally breaks my heart, isk2 :(

I was so in love with Westlife and I kept on talking about them in school. Even my friends got tired of listening about them.

I know you might think that Westlife is probably my silly celebrity crush whatsoever but they actually brought a big change in my life. If I have no idea who Westlife is, I might not know who's Mr.A :) The first thing that both of us have in common is Westlife :) He added me on Myspace because I share the same interest with him, Westlife ♥ Well, since then, we talked and talked a lot about Westlife, and got to know each other more and then, fell in love with each other. Awwwwwww ♥

I don't care if people says I'm outdated for liking a band that's not so famous now or whatever. Yeah, I don't care. This band brought music that speaks to me, the music that really touches my heart, the music that fits me and most of all, the music that brought Mr.A and I together :) I will never stop listening to them, EVER ♥

Actually, I tried to be up-to-date and listen to the newest Korean boyband and other new bands. But seriously, non of them can even come close to Westlife. Westlife's still the best, I love you Westlife ♥

Sweet and Sour

2010-10-23T03:42:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I am currently smiling so broadly :) Mr.A sent me a message at Facebook earlier. Awhhh, he's so sweeeeeetttt. Dearrrr, it's just too bad that you're so far away right now. If you're just beside me right now, I would want to hug you, and kiss you, and never let you go. You totally melted my heart with your words. I love you so much.. and I miss you so badly :(
Just so you know, you're always in my heart too

Anyways, I feel crappy today. My feet hurts quite badly and I feel like catching a flu. Well, I hope I don't. My parents forced me to have lunch with my dad and my tok su today, when I totally made it clear for them that I don't want to. The restaurant was not that good. I mean, the food is tasty but a little too dry for me. Maybe because of the hot weather for something -_ -

Ya Allah, I'm not feeling well. Erm, I guess that's all for today. Bye, assalamualaikum :)

One call made my day

2010-10-21T02:14:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

You see, I had a terrible day at school. Yes, it's as boring as ever. But still, I'm smiling so broadly right now. Oh goshh, after 17 days not calling, Mr.A finally called :) My God, I miss his voice so much, my heart beats so fast when I heard my phone's ringing and when I picked up the phone, and listened to his voice, sweet voice, I was comforted. Haha, Syahirah angau sungguh kan? Karate sikit :)

Anyways, I don't want to talk about it any further. Besides, I promised him not to talk about our love life too much on my blog. He said we need some privacy in this relationship. It's okay, I'll respect that.

Today at school, it all started with sukaneka. As usual, being the 'active' me, I didn't join anything. Then, Maryleen told me about something that made me HATE Puan Lextra even more. Hishh, if only Islam allow murder to the person we hate, I'd kill him a long time ago. Hishh, he's so damn annoying. Just looking at him can make me want to puke !! Not to mention when he talked to me, I lose all my mood to talk to people. He's just.. yeah, annoys me to death.

Then, choir. Well, the class that I dislike the most won. This time, I'm not going to talk trash about them. I mean, yeah, they were kinda good but my dislike to them just shuts my ears from listening to them. But the other class, who's the runner-up was a total stuck up ! Yo man ! You didn't win and your performance wasn't that good. Even an idiot can tell that we're much better. Your class was okay and happy but youuuuuu, you must rub your winning to our faces, musn't you? You made your whole class look bad in my eyes ! Seriously, I HATE YOU ! Man, your singing sucks so stop thinking that you're better than us. I think your class win because of the WHOLE class co-operation, not you. Erghh, puh-lease.

I was in the worst mood when I got back from school but then, Mr.A call and totally made my day. So thanks to him :)

I'll stop now, goodbye for now. Assalamualaikum :D

20102010

2010-10-20T05:30:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum everyone :)

Yes, I did not came to school today. Ergh, too lazy la people. Yesterday was so boring and well, after PMR, there's no point of going to school anyway. They just organize some dumb activities to fill our time at school that only certain people can join. Yeah, you can't expect EVERYONE to join the sports right? Come on, I wonder it actually occur their little minds to organize classroom activities. What classroom activities? Well, the kind of activities that they do in CLASSROOMS, instead of being outside with people from other classes. Err, I'm not actually being a b*tch or a total diva here, but I simply hate being with a lot of people, outside, where it's hot and makes me sweat uh-LOT and the NOISES... ARGHHHHH !!! SHUT THE HELL UP !!!
*okay now you know I cannot stand noisy people.

So I woke up today, told my mom that I didn't feel like going to school and to my surprise, she simply said "Okay," and let me go back to sleep. And I got to sleep until... well, near afternoon where I realized that.. well, it's private. Bla bla bla, after taking my shower, ate lunch and realized that I have nothing to do. Darn, I should have come to school today.

So I spent my day surfing the Net, reading, writing in my diary, and eat eat eat. Once, I came to my mom and said, "Mom, I'm bored. Is there anything to eat?"
Hahahaha, seriously, who eat because of boredom? Moi :D No wonder I gained a couple of pounds lately. I thought about getting back to my yoga routine but I'm just too lazy. I keep on telling myself, "Ahh, tomorrow" and "Tomorrow, no rush" and "Tomorrow lah!"
Haha, if I keep on like that, I'll be like a ballon in no time.

Tomorrow, choir competition and I haven't memorize the song. Grrr !!! Ya Allah.. Can I really do it? Tak nak datang esok, boleh tak? :)

I'll stop now, bye :) Assalamualaikum.

Man, what a boring day -_-

2010-10-19T06:45:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

Allahuakbar, only He knows how annoyed I was today. I shouldn't come to school today, I really shouldn't. I should have stayed home, surfing the Net all day, read new books, watch TV and basically do a lot of fun stuff compared to what I did at school today.

Since the Form 4 are having their exams, teachers won't let us go into our classrooms, and MADE us watch the game instead. Duh, I'm not interested in watching other people playing badminton lah. It's not that interesting anyway -_- It was hot, there's a lot of people, it was noisy, and well, everyone's like screaming, and singing, and I was like "OMG, shut the hell up !"

Grrr, after recess, I thought it's finally time to get to class, I miss that dusty, dirty classroom so badly :) But no, they got all Form 3 students to the Bengkel Pertanian instead and MADE us watch the pertandingan syair. Ishh, it's annoying. And I had to sit next to this noisy girl who kept on talking so loud like her friend's one kilometer away or something like that. Grrr, and goshh, when it's time for her friends to go in front for syair, she screamed at the top of her voice that I actually jumped because I was too shocked. At that time, I asked God, "Dear Allah, what have I done do deserve this?"

Then, when things finally toned down, and I finally can get Filzah's cellphone to bluetooth some new songs, Cikgu Basha came out with some silly games and they made ME to be the leader =_='
I was like, "Noooooo, I don't want to ! Please, leave me aloneeee !!"
But noooo, they made me the leader instead. Seriously, I would KILL to have some alone time at that moment. So I was like, "whatever, this is a stupid game anyway"
So when Cikgu Basha told us the game rules, I dazed off and when he finally finished talking, I was like.. "huh? what did he say?"

So, when the game started, I still don't know what the game's rules is but well, I just play along. We lost, but whatever. Who told you guys to choose the leader who did not want to lead at the first place?

Then, after school, I stayed back with the 3RK1s for choir. Seriously, the 21 Guns song seems so hard to memorize -_- But well, lets just give it a shot :) Somehow during the practice, I was really thankful to have Chris in our class, he can play the guitar so well and made me quite confident that we can really do this thing :)

I guess I talked to much already :) Goodnight everyone, have a nice sleep :D

Assalamualaikum.

Patiently waiting.

2010-10-17T22:25:00.000-07:00

Dear Allah, help me :(

Assalamualaikum,

You see, when he first confessed his love to me, we contacted each other every day. We could not get over each other. Then, there was a time when he did not text me for 3 whole days, and I was worried sick, I could not eat, I could not sleep, I'm worried that something bad might happen to him. But then after 3 days, he texted me and told me that he ran out of credit to text me. I was comforted.

That was last year's story. Early this year, he went to MTD and had a hard time to contact me. God knows how worried I was, how much I missed him. I cried my eyes out because I missed him too much. He's my best companion, he's there for me when I needed him and he's the one that always listens when I'm in trouble. When he's in MTD, he can only call me once or twice a week. Sometimes 3 times, that's if he's lucky enough to have spare time to call me. Sure, it's torturing but somehow we managed to get through all that.

Then he moved to MRSM Kuala Berang. At first, everything's okay. We contacted each other more frequently compared to when he's in MTD. But then he got busy with activities there and it's MTD all over again. I guess I actually should be thankful that he actually still spare some time to call me.

Now, I realized that he hadn't called me for 15 days. God knows how much I miss him but I'm amazed how strong I am to face all this. The old me would cry her eyes out waiting for his call but the new me is stronger. I'm not crying, alhamdulillah. It's just.. now I hope that God will stop giving me hope that he will call me soon, and give me strength to hold back my tears. Seriously, sometimes I'm tired of crying. But.. tears come out whenever they feel like it, right?

Hey you, if you read this, no worries. I'm not asking you to call me, just take your time. I'm strong enough.

Penat, tak tahan !

2010-10-17T08:15:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

Honestly, mood aku memang tengah down gila sekarang. Badan aku sengal-sengal, kepala aku sakit gila nak mati, aku mengantuk sepanjang hari, aku tak ada mood nak bercakap dengan orang, leher aku rasa macam nak putus dan tangan kiri aku rasa macam dah hampir lumpuh dah, nak bergerak pun payah. Pagi tadi lagi seksa, belakang rasa macam nak patah dah. Sakit bebenar -_-

Even that, aku tahan aje. Malas nak beritahu parents aku yang aku sakit, tak suka ouh. Nanti dorang bimbang and paksa aku pergi klinik, tempat yang aku dah cukup tak suka :( Then, naik kereta, terpaksa tahan dengan adik aku yang gedik tu. Tak tahulah apa kena dengan hidung dia, tapi sepanjang perjalanan, tak habis-habis nak korek hidung. Geli ohhh !! Lepas tu banyak pula dia membebel, bikin sakit telinga mendengar je. Then masa dekat kedai makan, mak aku tanya, "Ira ni kenapa? Masam je muka?". Belum sempat aku nak menjawab, budak gedik tu dah jawabkan "Alah dia memang macam tu, sengaja nak buat orang sakit hati".

Grrr, jap, mak aku tanya aku kan? Yang dia nak menyibuk kenapa? Nak aje aku menjerit "WOI BONGOK ! Aku senyap tak kacau kau kan? Apa masalah kau???!!"
Sengal je, aku tak kacau dia pun an? Aku diam je, tak macam dia yang membebel 24 jam, aku tak kacau orang, aku tak kutuk orang, aku tak mengumpat orang, aku tak tanya soalan yang sama over and over again dekat ayah aku.. Dia tu? Semua tu dia buat, grrr, kalau ikut hati aku dah lama aku sumbat stokin busuk tu dalam mulut dia.

Naik geram aku dengan budak yang ketagih perhatian tu. Bila parents aku nak tanya apa-apa kat aku, sibuk nak suruh dorang tanya dia. Selagi boleh nak jatuhkan air muka aku depan parents aku. Bila cakap apa-apa yang buruk, mesti ada perkataan "macam Ira" belakang benda-benda yang buruk tu. Bila cakap pasal barang-barang aku, mesti kata "Dahlah buruk,buruk buruk" and hina habis-habis barang aku tu macam tu najis. Seriously, siapa tak sakit hati??? sebab tu kalau kat sekolah, aku buat derk je kt dia macam dia bukan adik aku. Tapi depan kawan-kawan aku, buat-buat baik. Bongong.

Kadang-kadang aku cemburu tengok kawan-kawan aku ouh. Tengok Fara, adik dia tak buat perangai macam ni pun. Maryleen? Adik dia baik gila. Siapa lagi? Chris? Adik dia baik gila.. Siapa lagi? Biarlah, yang penting, adik semua orang baik, adik aku? Aku tahu, aku kakak yang amat malang.

Corus Hotel and Palace of Golden Horses :)

2010-10-17T07:29:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

16 October 2010. One of the best days in my life. I really enjoyed myself on this date and this will be the day I will never forget.

I woke up at 6.30 a.m for Subuh and I did not go back to sleep. Waiting around, surfing internet and only took shower at 8. Went breakfast at a mamak restaurant and went to Corus Hotel for the rehearsal for Prefect's Annual Gala Day. It was a nice hotel, and I thought I'm the first one among the people involved for the rehearsal that was there early. Called Iqraq for a few times but no answer. So while waiting for him, I went for a coffee at the lounge. The service was crap, it took them forever for our coffee and tea. Then, I saw Iqraq and he told me to go to the ballroom upstairs. I told him that I'm still waiting for my tea so he went first. After 20 more minutes without my tea, my father and I decided to cancel the coffee.

My first impression when I entered to ballroom was 'wow!'. It's probably the best place for Prefect's feast to date. I helped Iqraq with his script and watched the 'Single Ladies' dance practice. I still wonder how on earth the girls managed to dance around with those high heels -_-

Ruben told me that the rehearsal will be starting at 9.30 a.m max. We waited for him until 10.30 a.m. I know, s***ty right? But then, the rehearsal went well, even with some additional changes that messed up the script. Then, at 12, they let us go to change.

One thing I know for sure, compared to other prefects, my attire looks like crap, I look like crap -_-

God knows how nervous I was to get up the stage. Iqraq and I messed up the form 5 names and quite a few times I forgot to mention my lines. Things were a little bit messed up during the prize giving session but we got that covered (hopefully). Then, after everything's done, the feast began and I took everything that I could find. It was blissful :)

I had to leave early for another event at Palace of Golden Horses. I was so frustrated but.. it's family, I can't do anything. But the wedding reception at Palace of Golden Horses was... uh-mazing. The hall was darn big ! It's 5 times bigger than the hall at Corus Hotel. The band was amazing, the food was tasty and I was very sure that I saw Siti Nurhaliza there. After the wedding reception, the family members needed to stay back while the non-family members can go home (ceh, mcm menghalau puloks). Since there's so many people, the guests had to queue to go out. I went to the lines to look for Siti Nurhaliza and I saw someone that wore the kind of tudung that she always wears. Everyone was so eager to take picture with this someone and I was like.. "who is this woman? she does look familiar"

I went back to my place and asked my mom who is she. Well, she's Normala Shamsudin. Haha XD I wanted to go back to take pictures with her but.. well, she's with her husband and I was too shy to face him. But I do walk in front of Dato' Sri Ismail Sabri at that wedding (cehh, itu pun nak bangga?) And I saw Dato' Sri Ali Rustam there. And.. well, it's funny how I look at those ministers and said.. "Hey, they look kinda familiar, who are they mummy?" I know I'm stupid, just shut up -_-

I chatted with Che' Wan, my cousin at the wedding. He's all grown up now, I remembered him being short and had such soft voice :) Now... ahh, everyone's growing up so fast *wiping tears* XD

I think I talked too much already, goodbye everyone ;)

Assalamualaikum..

Budak pandai :)

2010-10-15T16:28:00.000-07:00

Tuan-tuan dan puan-puan, saya suka budak ni :)

Boring day -_-

2010-10-15T03:26:00.000-07:00

Exam weight, grrrr.

Assalamualaikum,

Gosh, I seriously need to cut down a few pounds, and well, get active again. Haha, not that I'm actually really active before but still.. Haha, you think I gained a few pounds eh? Haha, maybe yes, maybe no. Truthfully, I'm just too afraid to get on the scale.

Kalau jadi macam tu, macam mana? Kesian alat penimbang aku ouhhh. Haha, alat penimbang tu pun rosak actually. Bengong gila kot, lepas aku melantak macam orang tak makan 3 hari, berat aku turun 3kg kot. Tapi lepas aku kelaparan 1 hari sebab cuba nak berdiet, errr, haha, naik berapa kg tah, tapi turunlah. Sengal kan? Bikin panas je.

Anyways, kenapa tiba-tiba cakap pasal berat ni? Err, esok jamuan pengawas, so aku actually takut baju tak muat. And seriously, aku cukup stress pasal benda alah ni. Dah jadi MC, kena datang awal. Pukul 9 dah kena ada kat sana, tapi majlis mula pukul 1.30 tengahari, munasabah tak? Tak? Tak kan? Aku kat situ pun bukan boleh membantu pun (haha, jangan mimpi pun aku nak tolong angkat2 barang ni, puh-lease la). Dah lah, nasiblah dorang.

Lupakan pasal jamuan pengawas, aku nak cerita pula pasal hari ni. First of all, aku nak minta maaf sangat-sangat dekat Munie. Mun, aku pecahkan cermin kau weh, tengah ralat main-main tadi, tiba-tiba aku jatuhkan. Sorry weh, nanti aku ganti yang baru.

Aku ingat nak minta maaf tadi, tapi bila aku try nak cakap dengan dia, dia jalan straight tak pandang orang lain, terus ke tandas. I was like, "Doh, napa dengan dia?"

Aishaa pula cerita yang ada budak-budak form 5 panggil dia, and then bila Munie datang dekat dorang, dorang buat-buat panggil orang lain pula. Apa lagi, malu gilalah Munie depan orang ramai.

Then, aku, Farah, Syaf, Shida,Aishaa, Filzah and Shida pun pergi ke tandas, nampak Munie tengah betulkan tudung. Bila kitorang masuk, dia menangis. Kesian dia ouh, memang aku rasa macam nak mencarut habis-habisan dekat mamat-mamat form 5 tu . Apa masalah dorang? Suka hati mak bapak dorang je nak buat orang macam tu. Filzah kata, memang macam tu perangai budak-budak kelas belakang, jokes dorang sangat offensive dan menyakitkan hati. Eh, peduli lah kelas belakang ke, kelas depan ke, kelas tengah ke, kelas tengah tak ke belakang sangat ke, ape ke, kalau dah menyakitkan hati kawan aku, jangan mimpilah aku nak diam aje, ok?

Some people... huhh !

Tapi serious cakap, hari ni memang bosan gila. Lepas sekolah, aku stay sampai pukul 3.30 petang nak berlatih drama. Serious aku cuak nak buat drama tu, kalau tak jadi macam mana? Kalau aku dapat stage fright macam mana? Grrr, dahlah kena berdepan dengan kelas X, takkan nak biarkan dorang menang? Oh tidaaaaaaaakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk !!!

Hurhh, waaaa, I'm stressed out -_-

Assalamualaikum.

p.s Wish me luck for tomorrow :)

Serious aku tak suka, faham tak? TAK SUKA !

2010-10-14T03:35:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

You know, some people really need to realize that people simply hate them and cannot stand the sight of him. Who am I talking about? Well, if you're a true follower of my blog, or you're Maryleen and Faiz, you will know who am I talking about.

As you know, Maryleen is one of my dearest friends. She's probably the first person that I had a real conversation with when I started high school. She's always with me through thick and thin, she's beside me when I cried, she gets angry at me when I got too down about guys and got me back up again, she always gives me bold and honest answers, and she understands me. Sure, we fight a lot and we argue a lot more but that's our friendship. I love Maryleen dearly and I am obviously very protective of her.

Maryleen is honest and when she does not like someone, she ignores him/her completely and does not even want to talk to them anymore. Currently, she's been ignoring this guy who annoyed the crap out of her. But this guy somehow is too stupid to realize that. Well, this guy annoyed me too but somehow I'm still too nice to become a total fake queen in front of him. Then today, Maryleen told me that this guy swore at her, saying the word 'f*ck' and lots more. I was like.. grrr, who the hell do you think you are to talk to my friend like that??!! Doh, kalau ikut aku dah lama aku sebut nama kau dalam blog aku ni tahu tak? Kau ingat kau tu bagus sangat ke? Kau tu yang suka sangat buat kawan aku sakit hati, so biarlah kawan aku nak pulau kau ke tak !! Kau nak mencarut kat dia tu apahal?! Apa? Lu ingat lu bagus ka? Weh, sedarlah. SATU kelas tak suka kau weh, bukak mata kau tu sikit !!! Kau suka claim kau pandai kan? KAN??!! Benda dah terang tang tang depan mata ni pun kau tak nampak?

Grrr, serious panas gila aku dengan kau tadi tahu tak? Kalau ikut aku, dah lama aku nak tengking kau tadi ouh. Melampaulah kau ni. Aku tak suka orang cakap dengan kawan aku macam tu okay? So kalau kau nampak aku pulau kau kat sekolah or kat kelas nanti, silalah faham yang perasaan tak suka aku dekat kau tu, dah bertukar jadi benci.

Hurhh, am I too over? Maybe but seriously you guys, I think you guys will actually HATE this guy if you know him. Effing annoying.

Forget about Mr.Jack***. Lets move on for something else. Well, today, after school, I stayed late with Iqraq as Ruben and Shaleny wanted to talk to us about the MC duty for Prefect Annual Gala (or something named like that). Then, while waiting for them, Iqraq told me, "Weh, **** ingat kau couple dengan Faiz doh!" I was like, "SENGAL GILA **** TU ! MANA ADA !!"
Then si Iqraq tulis something kat phone dia, claiming yg dia nak tulis "Syahirah love Faiz" kat status dia. Sumpah sengal gila mamat tu, nak blackmail aku pulak -_- Buatlah, aku post jugak gambar hot kau tu nanti.

Oh man, jamuan pengawas actually start pukul 1.30, lepas Zohor, tapi aku kena dah ada kat hotel pukul 9 pagi, nak rehearsal. Wehhh ! Tak jadi aku nak tidur lambat ! Grrr... lepas tu kena bersiap dekat sana pula tu, waaaaaaa :( Tak suka ouhhh.
And skrip aku semua dalam bahasa Inggeris. Choyy, harap tak berbelit lidah aku masa depan orang ramai nanti -_- Oh God..... :(

Hish, malas gila kot nak tulis panjang-panjang. Oh wait, bukan tadi aku tulis dalam bahasa Inggeris ke? Eh? Now why is it in Malay? Eh? EH?

Haha, dah rojak dah blog aku, muahahahahahah !!! XD

Assalamualaikum :D

THE BLACKER UTAN DRAMA

2010-10-13T07:19:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

As usual, my school will never be quiet. There's always a little drama going on. But still, those drama always make school life interesting, don't you think?

Lets forget about the drama for a while. I'll tell about that later. Today was kinda a boring day at school. From 7.30 a.m until 9.50 a.m, we sat at the dataran perhimpunan, listening to teacher's blah blah blah about after PMR activities and all that. Then, they told us a little bit about streaming for next year and well, I don't need to listen. Forget other options, I'm choosing Pure Science. My dream since I started high school :) Can I do it? I believe I can but now I'm hoping my PMR grades agree with me :)

And finally today I can sit down and talk a lot of things with Filzah. This year was rough for our friendship, we're not as close as we were last year. Last year, wherever I go, there's always Filzah and wherever Filzah go, there's always me. This year, she spent most of her time dealing with her personal problems and kinda needed time to be alone. And me? I'm mostly with Maryleen, Shida and Elza. But today, it's nice talking to her back today. What did we talk about? Waaa, children songs, Playhouse Disney, Mr.A, Mr. H and kids :) Heee :D

During recess, Nabila said hello to me and we did some catch up about our old friends from SK Pandan Perdana. I did not believe that one of my best friends in SKPP, SN used to be so mean to people. She told me that SN used to bully her friend, Er and tons more. I was so shocked.. well, SN was so sweet in front of me. Well, everyone in this world is hypocritical. We'd do anything to look good in front of other people.

Forget about SN, let's talk about this Blacker Utan drama. Well, he added me during PMR so I did not actually realize about his existence in Facebook. I approved and never say hi. Well, then all of the sudden, people got angry at him. Can't blame them, he's so rude. He claimed that he's a Muslim but did not have the attitude like one. He offends people and said gayish stuff. Yeah, he's sick -_- But still, it pissed me off to see him using Allah or Islam in his offensive speech. Hishh, if he's not a Muslim, then he really offended tons of Muslim but if he is, he's such a disgrace. Oh well, even if he really is, there'a always satu golongan bernama 'munafik' bukan? He's one of them I guess?

Now sampai pihak atasan pun nak masuk campur hal ni. He's deaddddd meat.

Oh well, serves him right :D

What else eh? I guess that's it. You see, I started writing this post at 9.30 and finished at 10.17 p.m. 'Laju' kan aku taip?

Assalamualaikum :)

What a boring day -_-

2010-10-12T08:44:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Before PMR, I complained a lot about studies, about time, about my addiction to Internet and a lot more. I wished that PMR would be over so quickly so I could get back to my old life and not stressed out about PMR.
I wished I could just log on to my Facebook all day and reading other people's blog all dayyyy and do absolutely nothing. I wished people would just leave me alone in my room and let me be with loud music and comfy pillows.

But seriously, after one day, I got tired of those routines. Logging on to Facebook all day was not that fun and people hardly update blog in the middle of the day. I'm too lazy to do blogwalking and being alone in my room with loud music was not as fun as I thought I would be. Haihhh, you know, after months stressing out about exams, when I doing nothing, there's a voice in my head said "Kau ni, tak belajar ke? PMR dah dekat.." and I suddenly got up from bed and said "OMG !!! ..... eh wait, PMR's over !" *going back to bed*

I sound like a total loser eh? And most of all, I ate A LOT today. Ate nasi kuning for breakfast, nasi again for lunch, a small packet of biscuits for dessert, cereals for tea, nasi again for dinner and ice cream for supper. Whoa, banyak kan? Gerenti makin gemuk ouhhh.. Masuk sekolah nanti, my friends mesti kata, "Eh Syahirah ! Tak ada beza pun !"
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA XD

By the way, I went to Tesco today, got a new book entitled '8 Tokoh Wanita Pencetus Turunnya Wahyu'.. Sound nice huh? Seriously, I feel so small reading about Khadijah r.a, Aishah r.a and Fatimah r.a.. They're all so smart, so nice and soooo.. gosh, they're amazing women. I wanna be like them, I really want to, but.. erm, I know that's not possible :( They're legends, and I'm not as strong as them.

I guess I'll stop now. Gotta go, bye everyone. Assalamualaikum :)

Old thoughts

2010-10-11T07:19:00.000-07:00

Hypocrisy?

Assalamualaikum :)

Some people really annoy the crap out of me, but sometimes I think maybe this is just like.. something that I deserve for being annoying and get to people's nerves back then. I remembered I used to be so loud, so 'kepoh' and so much more negative things. I did not realize how annoyed people are by me, until one of my friends told me about it. I still remember our conversation.

Friend : Hey, kau ni, apa kau buat kat sekolah?

Me : Erm? Kenapa?

Friend : Kau tak tahu ke? Alaaa.. ________________ tak suka kau kan. Dia cakap kat aku, kau ni kepoh gila nak mati.

Me : Huh? Ye ke? Depan aku dia baik sangat.

Friend : Alaaaahhh, tapi belakang kau, dia cakap kat aku yang dia tak suka kau.

Me : Ouh ye ke? Apa lagi dia cakap?

Friend : Erm, dia kata kau ni terlalu cepat marahlah, apa lahh.. Erm, biarlah dia, aku stand by kau ok?

Me : Ouh, thanks..

Friend : Erm, to make you feel better, aku pun tak suka dia. Family aku pun.

Me : Aaa, ye lah.

Since then, I feel different when it comes to this girl my friend's talking about. It's so hard to be fond to her, she's still so darn nice to me, and she's very sweet, but knowing that everything is a total hypocrisy, it hurts me. But still, I find myself doing the exact same thing.

Remember Puan Lextra? And this other girl that always annoy me but still, I'm still nice to them. Haihh, masalah kan?

p.s Haha, tak tahu apa motif tulis ni. Mengisi kebosanan :) But still, I wish I'm free from all these feelings and be happy and carefree again, like the picture above :)

I'm sorry kitty :(

2010-10-11T03:57:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

Aku sukakan kucing. Itulah makhluk Allah yang paling aku sayang, paling aku nak bela, paling aku cepat ada rasa belas kasihan. Even kawan-kawan aku pun naik muak dengan perangai aku yang suka sangat excited setiap kali ada kucing lalu. Haha, aku tahu aku sengal, so?

Nak dijadikan cerita, hari ni, lepas habis kertas Maths 2, aku menuju ke pagar sekolah. Mak aku dah tunggu nak pergi lunch sama-sama. Then, aku terdengar suara anak kucing. Aku tengok sekeliling, nampak seekor anak kucing warna tompok hitam putih bawah kereta. Kucing ni macam nak lintas jalan pergi ke ibu dengan adik dia kat bawah kereta di seberang jalan, tapi dia takut. Maybe sebab banyak manusia dan kereta masa tu, I don't know. Aku ingat nak tolong kucing tu, tapi bila nak tolong je, kucing tu masuk terus bawah kereta. Dah, satu kerja pula aku nak pujuk kucing tu keluar. Huuh, teringatkan mak aku yang dah lama tunggu kat luar, aku pun biarkan kucing tu and pergi ke mak aku.

Lepas lunch, aku masuk balik sekolah, and terserempak dengan Haniza. Kitorang jalan sama-sama and dia cerita kat aku, yang tadi ada anak kucing kena langgar kereta cikgu. Haniza cerita lagi, kesian tengok kucing tu, berdarah-darah. Aku pun kesian gila dengar, then Haniza tunjuk mayat kucing tu dekat pondok basikal. Sebak dada aku ouh, itulah anak kucing yang cuba nak lintas jalan tadi, yang aku biarkan tadi, yang aku tak tolong tadi. Berdarah muka kucing tu, budak-budak laki kat pondok basikal tu pula main-main pasal mayat kucing tu... aku pula? Diserubung perasaan bersalah.

Kalaulah aku tolong kucing tu tadi... mesti kucing tu tak mati kan? Aku ada peluang nak selamatkan kucing tu, aku tak tolong. Sedih aku. Tengoklah, sampai nak jawab KH pun rasa bersalah lagi.

I know this might not be a big deal, but for a cat lover like me, it is. I'm sorry kitty.

Last day of PMR :)

2010-10-11T03:37:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Before apa-apa, saya nak ucapkan, selamat menyambut kebebasan kepada semua pelajar PMR :) Heee , silalah enjoy dalam tahap yang berpatutan ye, tak naklah dengar berita tentang pelajar PMR yang terlalu seronok dengan kebebasan sampai buat aksi ngeri terjun dari tingkat 100. Haha, itu tak mungkin, but we'll never knowww :)

Alhamdulillah, hari ni paper terakhir untuk PMR 2010. Allah aje yang tahu betapa aku tunggu tarikh ni, isk2 :( Rasa macam lega sangat bila semua paper dah habis, bila semuanya dah selesai, rasa macam beban kat bahu dah lepas separuh (lagi separuh tunggu result).

Kertas 1 Mathematics alhamdulillah aku boleh jawab. Aku rasa macam mesin pulak tadi ouh, start je exam, baca doa sekejap, then sebelum buka kertas, baca bismillah and then boom ! Laju je tekan kalkulator tu. Grrr, aku peruntukkan 1 minit untuk setiap soalan, entah boleh jawab betul ke tidak. Harap tak ada careless mistake ouh. Itu pun tak cukup masa nak semak semua. Haihh, tapi sempat pula aku tengok Dhanusya, semua orang tengah bertungkus-lumus nak siapkan+semak kertas masing-masing, dia duduk kat situ, termenung. I was like, "Gilak ar ! Cepat gila dia siap!!"

Maths 2 pun agak senang, alhamdulillah :) Dorang beri masa 1 jam 45 minit, aku siapkan dalam masa 45 minit je, hahaha XD But at least, segala usaha aku buat latihan Maths banyak-banyak berbaloi juga. Oh, dan walaupun aku selalu merungut+muncung mulut+naik geram dengan Puan Chong sebab beri terlalu banyak latihan Maths, tapi sekarang aku bersyukur sangat, sebab berkat latihan yang dia beri, segalanya jadi mudah hari ni. Yep, like the saying, "Berakit-rakit ke hulu, berenang-renang ke tepian, bersakit-sakit dahulu, bersenang-senang kemudian" :) By the way, kalau peribahasa ni salah, sila diamkan XD

Kertas KH pula terlalu susah. Tak nak cerita -_-

Erm, I guess that's all for now :) Overall, aku lega sangat PMR dah habis. Just.. ada satu peristiwa tadi yang buat aku menyesal tak sudah. Apa dia? I'll tell you guys later. Wait for my later postt ! :)

Kisah PMR 2010

2010-10-07T05:24:00.000-07:00

I tried my best, and all I can do now, is pray.. and hope.

Assalamualaikum,

PMR is not over yet. There's still one more day to face, then I'll be free. Honestly, unlike anybody else, I am not looking forward for freedom. Sometimes I wish I could just turn back to the first day of exam, so that I could do the exam all over again and I promise myself, I will do better. Too bad, like the song said, "You can't always get what you want" and I know, this will be my only wish that will never come true, no matter how much I pray for it.

I guess I made it clear that I screwed up my PMR eh? Well, we don't know that yet but it does feel like it. I messed up my Bahasa Melayu paper so badly. It's so hard :( and Pendidikan Islam was kinda easy, but as usual, I always find my way to screw up, even if I don't intend to. You know what I did? I wrote the question's numbers in the "ruangan pemeriksa". Grrr, I am so stupid. What the heck was I thinking? But everybody said it's not really a big deal, so.. yeah, I guess I can let that go.

The next day was English and Geography. Alhamdulillah, these two were quite nice to me ;) Hee, alhamdulillah I can answer it properly and I am actually quite happy with my essay :D I just hope those examiners can read my tiny handwriting. I realized that when I'm nervous, I tend to write letters more closely and smaller. Hurhh :(

And today, Science and Sejarah. How was it? Oh, it's not that bad. I just feel like KILLING MYSELF WITH A KNIFE after doing it. So, it's not bad, not bad at all. It's the worst !!
Grrr, Science Paper 2 was damn hard, I have zero idea what that questions want and I seriously almost cried answering it. If this is a normal exam, it's alright. But this is P-M-R !! PENILAIAN MENENGAH RENDAH man !! Hishhh.
And Sejarah was okay but I realized some of my mistakes, so it kinda is killing me now.

I hate realizing my mistakes after I did it. But, I guess I have to move on and look forward for the next exams. Hish, you know, when people have Ipod, or their cellphone near their bed, or beside their pillows, I have a pile of books beside mine. Nice huh? Books are my closest company for now, but I guess not for long :)

I'll stop now, goodbye everyone :)

OH PMR :(

2010-10-02T20:38:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

PMR is in a couple of days, and yes, I'm so worried and darn nervous. I have no idea how on Earth am I going to do it, everything seems so impossible right now :(

I'm trying to take see everything on the bright side... (Oh God, I have another 87 chapters in PAI to revise -_- )

Err, anyways, wish me luck. I need to best of it. Doakan saya ye kawan-kawan :) Heeee ~~

Kepada mereka yang akan mengambil PMR tahun ni, selamat berjaya, do your best :) Dan kepada kawan-kawan dan cikgu-cikgu, saya minta maaf banyak-banyak kalau pernah buat salah dan silap :( Maafkan saya ye? :)

I guess I'll go now :) Assalamualaikum :)

Headache

2010-09-29T03:10:00.000-07:00

" Ira ni belajar kuat sangatlah, relaxlah sikit"

Assalamualaikum :)

Apakah ayat di atas? Percaya tak kalau aku kata, ayat itu keluar dari mulut mak aku petang tadi? Ceh, dulu bukan main mak aku suruh aku belajar, belajar dan belajar. Sekarang, aku belajar sampai tahap nak demam, mak aku suruh aku relax pula. Huuh, tapi alhamdulillah, sekarang ni beban menghafal Sejarah aku dah kurang, dan sekarang aku terpaksa fokus ke Pendidikan Islam pula.

By the way, hari ni agak tidak seronok. Sekolah sungguh membosankan. Aku banyak termenung aje baru-baru ni. Truthfully, aku rindu sangat dengan Mr.A ouh :( Rasa macam lama gila dia tak call. Biarlah, aku tahu dia sibuk .

Anyways, hari aku sedar, hampir separuh kelas aku nak pindah tahun depan. Ada yang nak apply SBPI Gombak lah, MRSM lah.. huuh, sedih gila aku. Serious, I'm soooo going to miss you guys if you guys are going :( And semua orang asyik terkejut dan tak putus-putus tanya aku kenapa aku tak apply sekolah berasrama. Dan aku cukup penat dengar pertanyaan "Wah ! Awak dapat 8A dalam percubaan hari tu, pergilah apply asrama! Tak? Kenapa? Kenapa? Kenapa?"
Dan penat aku nak explain : PARENTS AKU TAK BAGI.
*dah, jangan tanya lagi dah*

Haih, aku rasa aku ni jahat ouh. And aku TAK NAK jadi jahat, tapi kenapa aku tak boleh elak nak rasa rimas bila dekat dengan Puan Lextra ekh? Kadang-kadang aku rasa macam nak tumbuk muka dia sekali, SEKAAAALIIII JE weh, lepas tu aku janji tak benci dia dah. Boleh tak? Tak? I thought so.

Hari ni aku tanya cikgu tentang kelas Sains Tulen tahun depan. And aku cukup happy bila cikgu kata yang kelas X tipis kemungkinan untuk masuk sama kelas dengan kelas aku tahun depan. Ramai gila classmates aku yang bersorak kot. Cikgu pun hairan kenapa kitorang benci sangat dengan kelas X. And bila kitorang explain, cikgu pun kata cikgu suka mengapi-apikan kelas X dengan memuji-muji kelas kitorang. Alhamdulillah cikgu ! Dengan tindakan cikgu, finally dorang rasa apa yang kami rasa selama ni. Turns out, kelas X pun tak suka kelas kitorang. So what?

Budak Am tu tadi dengan beraninya cakap kat E yang dia nak jumpa E lepas sekolah. Okay, aku, Mary and Shida paksa E jumpa dia walaupun E keras-keras kata tak nak. Tapi akhir-akhir sekali, budak Am tu blah awal. Ya Allah, rasa macam nak cincang je mamat tu tadi. Tak gentleman langsung !

Err, penat aku nak tulis panjang-panjang :) Bye for now.

Assalamualaikum.

Afiah Dilla, he's your second best.

2010-09-24T18:49:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I'm finally in a good mood, after 5 days not sleeping well, I finally got my beauty sleep last night :) Alhamdulillah ya rabbi ! Heeee :)

I actually want to dedicate this post to my friend, Afiah Dilla. Dear, I read your latest post. I'm so sorry to hear about him. Ira minta maaf sangat-sangat sebab tak dapat tolong Fia sekarang. Since PMR dah makin dekat, Ira dah jarang dapat on YM, and Facebook Ira pula, Ira dah deactivate kan. Fia selalu tolong Ira masa Ira ada masalah dengan Mr.A dulu, or bila Ira sedih, Fia selalu tenangkan Ira, and I feel bad I cannot do the same for you.

But still, I want you to be strong. It takes a lot to love somebody, and it will take a lot more to forget somebody too. He does not deserve you anyway, so forget about him. I know how hurtful it is when we finally fall for someone, and that someone who sent you tons of signals that he likes you, seems to forget about you, and go to somebody else. Yes, I've been there, and I know how hurt you are but sayang, jangan pedulikan dia lagi dah. He's not worth it, he's not worth all your tears, and most of all, he does not deserve you.

So, don't feel bad that you lose him. Ira pasti, satu hari nanti, akan ada lelaki yang akan sayangkan Fia lebih dari Fia sayangkan dia. Dia akan sayangkan Fia seadanya, dia akan terima kelemahan Fia, dan dia akan sentiasa berada dengan Fia, dan takkan tinggalkan Fia langsung. Okay? Allah itu Maha Adil Fia, segala yang berlaku antara Fia dengan dia, cuma dugaan Dia, dan Dia pasti kurniakan seseorang yang lebih baik untuk Fia satu hari nanti :)

Don't feel bad about this. Forget what people say, and move on :) Like the song "Express Yourself" by Madonna said (ceh, nak promote lagu juga) : "Second best is never enough, you'll do much better by your own" He's your second best, and Allah make you lose your second best, so you can find your best :)

So, don't be sad, stop your tears and smile :)

Assalamualaikum :)

I'm not strong to face this losers -_-

2010-09-23T23:36:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Yes, today's Friday, tomorrow's Saturday and the next day is Sunday. Yeahh, after that, PMR is officially 1 week away. Excited? No. Freaked out? Yes.

So, lets just forget about studies for a while. Today, Syaf brought kuih raya to school :) She then told me to taste the green colored kuih as she made it herself. So, I tried one and it was nice :) I liked it, I was actually really impressed that she made kuih that nice herself. Just when I wanted to praise her for it, she told me that she only make the 'acuan' -_- Choyy, I thought she made it from the scratch. Haihh, but it's still nice. Thanks for the kuih Syaf, I really like it. Esok bawalah lagi ye? (haha, muka tebal sungguh)

Nothing interesting in school today actually. Just Am keeps getting more annoying than ever. I can see from E's face, that if she can throw a table at him, she will. Grrr, seriously, he's a total gangster so why don't he be more macho and starts flirting with more macho and gentleman way? Some people are so stupid -_-

Talk about stupid, Mary told me that she thinks Puan Lextra is a total idiot. She completely ignored Puan Lextra and made it clear that she does not want to be friends with Puan Lextra or even talk to Puan Lextra again, but Puan Lextra still keeps on acting like she does not show any of those signs. Grrr, and Puan Lextra really annoyed me today. Seriously, WHEN I DO NOT ASK YOU ANYTHING, IT MEANS I DO NOT NEED YOUR FAVOR TO ANSWER IT AS I WANT TO DO IT MYSELF ! AND PLEASE DO NOT BOAST AROUND TELLING ME THAT YOU ANSWERED THE QUESTION, I DO NOT LIKE IT AND PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE IT !!!!!! SINCE YOU THINK YOU'RE SO SMART, START TO TAKE NOTICE THAT PEOPLE ARE ANNOYED BY YOU, AND CANNOT STAND THE SIGHT OF YOU !! GRR, I HOPE YOU GO TO ANOTHER SCHOOL NEXT YEAR -_-

I hate it when I have to face Puan Lextra everyday. I'm the one who's still nice enough to talk to him. I mean, yeah, I cannot be like Faiz, or Maryleen, or Shida. All of them are strong willing, if they hate someone, they made it clear and they can always make the person they hate stay away from them. Me? ... :(

That's it. Now I'm too depressed to write more.

Puan Lextra, tolonglah berubah (oh, Am juga)

2010-09-23T00:04:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Err, aku rasa macam dah lama aku tak update blog ni. Honestly, aku tak sedar pun berapa lama aku tak online. Only today, masa Science Syaf cakap aku dah lama tak update blog, aku sedar betapa rindunya aku dekat blog aku ni :) Haha, korang rasa aku dramaqueen ke? Suka hati korang lah.

Anyways, since PMR dah dekat, aku lebih banyak habiskan masa aku dengan menatap buku. Nak kata bosan tu, taklah bosan sangat. Aku bukan baca pun, banyak buat latihan Maths je. Alhamdulillah, semua latihan yang aku buat, dapat atas 80%. Itu pun boleh dikira markah atas pagar lagi. Seriously, selagi tak capai 90% tu, selagi tu aku tak puas. Entah-entah aku dah mula ketagih belajar tak? Setiap hari, lepas balik dari sekolah, aku makan lunch, tengok tv sekejap, then mandi and buat ulangkaji sampai pukul 7. Then, sambung balik dari pukul 8 sampai 12. Haha, itulah rutin harian aku buat masa ni, teruk kan? Hish, sampai termimpi-mimpi soalan Maths yang aku buat tu. Bayangkanlah ye, banyak-banyak mimpi yang aku boleh mimpi, soalan Maths juga yang aku mimpi? Hurhh, tapi tak pe kot, ayah aku kata itu normal. Alhamdulillah :)

Sekolah baru-baru ni okaylah juga. Just aku mula sedar yang kawan-kawan aku semua pulau Puan Lextra habis-habisan. Kejam juga dorang ouh. Kadang-kadang kesian pula aku tengok Puan Lextra tu, tapi kesian aku tak lama kot, sebab aku pun bukan sabar sangat dengan dia. Seriously Puan Lextra, tolonglah ubah perangai anda. Janganlah riak sangat, Allah tak suka, orang pun tak suka. Demi Allah, ubahlah diri awak. Saya sebenarnya sangat kasihan tengok awak. Saya pun sebenarnya cukup benci dengar orang mengumpat pasal awak. Apabila dorang mengumpat awak, saya pun berdosa sekali tahu? Hish awak ni, tolonglah ye? Buat untuk diri awak gak. Awak tabur fitnah pasal saya dengan orang tu, saya maafkan awak. Jadi, do yourself a favor and change. Bak kata Maryleen lah, nampaknya macam saya saje yang masih boleh sabar dengan perangai awak, yang masih boleh palsukan senyuman depan awak, orang lain dah tak sanggup dah. Jadi, sebelum saya jadi macam orang lain dan awak akan jadi 100% kera sumbang, baik awak berubah.

Seriously, kadang-kadang aku sedih bila semua orang lari dari aku bila Puan Lextra datang nak cakap dengan aku -_- Dorang ni kejam ouh, lari tak ajak ! Bila Puan Lextra pergi, baru datang balik dekat aku. Geram sungguh, lain kali jangan tinggalkan aku boleh tak korang??!! Aku pun tak suka dia juga, tapi tak adalah sampai sanggup nak lari. Grrr, rasa macam nak sula korang sekor-sekor bila korang lari ouh.

Sudahlah, penat pula aku nak cerita pasal Puan Lextra. Next update, Am. Remember Am? The creepy stalker who has a HUGE CRUSH on my friend E? Yeah, dia semakin melampau. Aku rasa E pun menyampah dengan dia ouh. Macam ni lah, take my advice, kalau nak sangat kawan aku tu layan kau, cubalah jadi gentleman sikit ! Janganlah memalukan kawan aku dengan terpekik-terlolong panggil nama dia, janganlah asyik merimaskan dia dengan pandang dia macam kau nak makan dia or something like that. Ye, kawan aku ada maruah okay? Bila kau buat macam tu, kau tak rasa ke yang maruah dia jatuh?

Penat aku tulis pasal 2 orang yang paling aku tak suka dalam hidup aku ni, yet, aku cuba bersabar and cuba jadi sebaik yang mungkin tentang dorang. Aku tak kejam, aku tak benci dorang, aku tak nak pun benci dorang, aku tak nak tinggikan suara kat dorang, aku tak nak buat dorang sakit hati, aku tak nak tampar tumbuk caci dorang. Tapi aku nak dorang berubah, supaya aku tak jadi seperti perkara yang aku tak nak tu, faham tak?

Ayah aku nasihatkan aku, memutuskan silaturrahim itu berdosa. Mereka yang memutuskan silaturrahim, tidak akan jejakkan kaki ke syurga. Aku tak nak jadi orang yang berdosa itu. Korang? Tepuk dada, tanyalah selera.

Assalamualaikum.

P.S I LOVE YOU :)

2010-09-18T21:29:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum you :)

You, I dreamed about you last night. Oh you were so sweet, you were so caring, you were very patient with me, I was so cranky in that dream but you were there for me, you hold my hand and told me, no matter what happen, you will always be there for me. And I was comforted.

You are great in my dreams, you are great in my real life. Being with you is just like one sweet dream :) I could not afford to lose you. Losing a great guy like you will be the worst that can ever happen to me. I appreciate you more than I could ever appreciate myself. You brought the side of me, that I thought I never have. And I love you much, so damn much.

What have I done to deserve you? You don't deserve me, you deserve much better. It's the fact that always hurts me. Like they said, the truth always hurts. Even that, I hold on to you, I don't want to lose you, I tried to improve myself so I can tell myself that I really deserve you, and you deserve me. But so far, I changed a lot, I became a better person than I used to be but still, I still feel that I do not deserve you.

When you told me that your friends said that you have no taste because you chose me to be yours, I was hurt. It proved that I'm not the only one to realize that. You are good looking ~~and hot~~ but you settle for an ugly, fat girl like me. Thinking that there's soooooo much beautiful girls in Kuala Berang, I was so jealous. So darn jealous that it actually hurts me. Every time when I pray for you, I cry. I pray that you will always be safe, I pray that your love to me will never change as my love to you will never change, I pray to God that He will show me what's inside of me that you really love, so I can hold on to it and never lose it. I pray that I will be as beautiful as those girls so you don't have an eye sore when you look at me later in life, I pray that I will become a better person, the person that can make you happy.

When I said all this to you, you simply laughed and said to me, that you know what's special about me and you will always love that. You will not tell me what it is as you want me to believe that I am special. I was quite comforted when you said that but it's not for long. Being the girl that got heart-broken all her life, I find it hard to believe that I'm special.

Erm, whatever it is, I love you more :) Hey, I will always try to make you happy okay? I promised to God, that I will always appreciate you no matter what happen and all my life, I will always try to make you happy :) And boy, you know I will always keep my promises :D

p.s I love you :)

When you're in love, waiting seems to be forever.

2010-09-18T01:28:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

After quite some days of worrying, after quite some days of waiting, finally he called. Yesterday, I waited for his call ALL DAY. It's just too bad his cellphone got stolen, that really gives me a hard time to contact him. So, all I can do is wait around.

Knowing that yesterday will be the last day before he went back to Kuala Berang, I waited and waited. Even when my parents told me to get ready for a dinner at the restaurant, I said no. I asked them to go without me and I waited for his call at home. I was such in a bad mood, I missed him so much, why hadn't he call? During Isyak, I prayed to Allah that he'll call. I put so much hope and I believe He will grant my wishes.

Then it's 10 o'clock, my parents came back from dinner and I realized how hungry I was. I regretted not joining them earlier. Looking back at my phone, I gave up. Maybe he's too busy. I missed him so much that it actually hurts me :( I guess he'll call me when he's in Kuala Berang, I said to myself and turned on the tv to watch Narnia.

I went to sleep at 12 o'clock. Just when I'm about to sleep, my cellphone rang and it's him. He called :) Finally I can smile. He said he missed me too, he's just too busy travelling around with his family. It's okay, I understand. Knowing that he's okay and safe means to world to me.

We talked for like only 30 minutes but that's more than enough for me. Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah for granting my wishes, I love You so much right now :) Thank You so much, thank You.

I know I might sound like a total looooser right now but.. yeah, when you're in love, you are. You'd do anything for the one that you love even if it means people might call you crazy or all sorts. I don't mind when people call me a loser for loving him with all my heart, because I know it's much better, than being a winner and have no one to love.

Mr.A, jaga diri elok-elok ye? I'll wait for you, I'll always do. Belajar elok-elok and most importantly, I love you so much ~~and jangan menggatal :)~~

Assalamualaikum.

New background

2010-09-17T05:53:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I changed my blog background :D Nice huh? After all this time of trying to find the right background, finally I found one :D Alhamdulillah.

Anyways, forget about the background for a sec. I wanted to blog so badly but lately, I have no idea what to say. What I do all day is worrying about PMR, and missing Mr. A. He hasn't call for 2 days now and I miss him since our last conversation. He was so sweet and he really reminded me why I fall for him on the first place. Grrr, I want him now, I need him :( He wanted me to call him yesterday but I was in the noisy shopping mall so I could not call him and now... I miss him :(

Okay, you might not want me to get all emotional or hormotional or.. whatever they call it. I'll change the subject eh? I went to opah's house today. Actually we went all the way to Petaling Jaya just because my mother wanted to learn how to cook rendang since people are coming to our house tomorrow. Too bad for her, there's no water in my opah's house so how to cook? We had to use the mineral water lah. Seriously, people cooking using mineral water, using mineral water to wash those vegetable and all sorts.. it's not something you hear everyday :)

She managed to cook the rendang anyways and well, also the agar-agar milo. I'll be looking forward to taste some tomorrow :)
And on our way home, we looked everywhere for lemang and ketupat. Seriously, I have no idea why people like lemang and ketupat, I hate them ! I always feel like puking after eating them. I don't know, I'm weird.

School's opening soon and I am quite looking forward for it. I miss my friends so much and there's so much catching up to do XD

Heee, I guess I'll stop now. I'll blog more later, bye :) Assalamualaikum :)

Merepek aje

2010-09-16T08:56:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I panicked looking at the calendar, but still, I did nothing to improve myself. Huuh, PMR is just around the corner but still, I have no urge to study at all. I'm actually getting tired of studying -_-
*slap myself* Grrr, I need to get this right or all the 3 years of studying will be in vain.

Just.. forget about the PMR for a sec okay? I mean, people kept on repeating the same damn letters and gosh, I'm getting tired of it. Tak ada huruf lain ke? A or B or C or D or E kan ada? Ni nak huruf P dengan M dengan R jugak. Haihh, manusia, manusia.

Apa kau merepek malam-malam buta ni Syahirah? HAHAHA, I don't know :)

*few hours later* I think I wanna go to sleep now, night night, sweet dreams :)

Assalamualaikum.

Secret ingredients :)

2010-09-15T07:01:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I got back from Batu Gajah today and I'm missing it already :) I miss my opah chu there, I miss it when everybody's there, I even miss babysitting those kids :) But I do not miss getting insect bites there. Seriously people, there's so much insects bites on my feet and it itch like *tuuuttt*. I have no idea how the insects managed to bite me, I wore long trousers all the time !

I do not miss the mosquitoes there. They are so huge that they looked like a small bee. Crazy right? Oh, and I'm not kidding.

I do miss my opah cho's cooking :) In Batu Gajah, she made her special sambal ikan bilis, udang sambal petai, kari ikan, and lots more. Maybe to you, it might seems ordinary but to me and people in Batu Gajah, those were so delicious and we kept on asking my opah cho about her secret ingredient :) She told my mom that there's no secret ingredient. For the sambal ikan bilis, she just blend the sambal with lots of bawang (i don't know which bawang) and for the curry, she used one packet of Baba's curry paste and one packet of Adabi's curry paste. I have no idea how that worked but as long as it tasted delicious, I don't mind :)

Haha, she told this and that about the ingredients but today, my opah told me that she actually put some ajinamoto when nobody's looking :) KANTOI ! XD
But what the heck, I don't mind. I am looking forward to go to Batu Gajah again to eat more of her cooking, even if that means I would add some more kilos :D Besides, what's the point living longer when you are not happy because you do not get what you always wanted, right?

I imagined my future today on my way home. I know I'm young, but I always wanted a husband, a few kids, nice home, nice car, nice family in-law, nice job, nice working time... I wonder if I'm going to get all that..
And then, when we stopped by at my grandpa's grave, I flashbacked to my past. I realized how much I miss my tokwan and I cried and cried. I was depressed for some time after that but alhamdulillah, I'm okay now. But still, I will never forgive myself for wasting his last hours and not being there for him enough when he's sick.

I guess we all have to move on eh? But sometimes, moving on just does not work. Sometimes I just like to stop and look back at my past, and learn from my mistake. All those mistakes I made with my tokwan, really taught me to appreciate everyone around me. So, I would like to take this chance to say thank you to everyone for being there for me. I love you guys :)

p.s I gained 3kg this raya. Nice huh? -_-

Hari Raya 2010

2010-09-15T06:27:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Those are the pictures of Raya 2010 :) Not that much, I know. And I did not take pictures that much too.
Reasons?

1- Too lazy
2- Too shy
3- My baju kurung kurang menawan :)

But still, I enjoyed this raya more than I could ever imagine :) I got so much duit raya (itu je reasonnya pun)

Babysitting ?

2010-09-13T22:24:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

So I spent the two days babysitting kids and I went completely out of my mind. Two days ago, my paksu came to Batu Gajah and he brought his two kids, Ariff and Arissa. Arissa is still like.. less than one years old so I do not have much problems with her. I spent most of my time with Ariff. Huuh, he wanted me to play the toy soldier with him. I was tired, I wanted to sleep and just be alone but since he's still a kid to suffer of my rejection (haha, perasan), I gave up and played with him. One thing you should know people, playing with kid, there's nothing fair. I played with Ariff and he got 10-15 soldiers but I only have 5 !! Waaaa, and I HAD to lose to him , haiyaaaa (lah Syahirah, dengan budak kecil pun nak berkira ke).

So I looked at Ilyas which I call Yas. He's my uncle actually but since he's like.. 5-6 years older than me, there's no way I'm calling him 'Pak Su'. We used to play together too when we were little kids and he had to cope with me all the time since I used to follow him around. We played "sep sep tom tom", Barbie dolls (I made him play), hide and seek.. and lots more. Aaah, good old days. Anyway, back to the story, I looked at him and asked him, "Yas, was I really like this when you had to deal with me when we were kids?" . He looked at noisy Ariff who shot my soldiers and said "Yeah, that's pretty much it".

I rolled my eyes and continued playing with Ariff. Then, the next night, Darwisya and her brother, Mikail came. At first they were kinda cranky and did not want to talk to people, which was extremely fine for me. Then, after dinner, I took my laptop and planned to spend the night with my lovely Facebook :) Yeah, the kids saw me and both wanted to use the Internet as well. Darwisya wanted to watch Doraemon but Mikail wanted to watch Thomas and Friends. Okay, so how do I choose??? Take turns lah kids, haiyaaa. And Youtube was soooooo slowwwww and the kids really cannot wait. After quite some time, the video finally loaded and they watched it together, which means it was quiet for a while. Yas was there and he felt really sorry for me so he let me log in to my Facebook with his Blackberry Bold.

Haaaa, I love Blackberryyyyy !! But just when I started to enjoy it, the kids became noisy again and asked me to play them a new video. Did the same thing again but this time, they almost fought. Yeah, one wanted to watch Doraemon, one wanted to watch Thomas and Friends. The video cannot play two videos at one time ! So they yelled and yelled and I was so confused what to do. Thank God my Mak Yang came to the rescue and told Mikail to watch Ben 10 on Opah Chu's laptop instead. It was okay for a little while, she put the laptop there, so I can watch Darwisya and Mikail at the same time. Then Zaqwan came, this little cutie did not have any problem and he just watched Mikail quietly. Then, the video finished and they both wanted me to open a new video. There's two laptops there, one pulled me to one side, one to the other. One wanted to play game, one wanted to watch more videos !! grrrr, and Yas just lie there instead of helping me handling all those noises, yelling and sorts. Yeah, he's a 'great' uncle to these kids.

After some time, the parents came and told them to behave and I got to handle them one by one. I spent most of my time with Darwisya and helped to find nice games on some sites. Then, my Mak Ngah called Mikail and her to clean the mess up. They finally got back home :)

Next morning, I went to my Opah Chik's house for lunch. After lunch, Darwisya saw me and asked me to teach her Maths. At the same time, Mikail wanted me to take pictures of him (seriously, that little dude was 2 years old but he posed like one professional male model). They both wanted to do different things, but I wanted to eat moreeee, I was still hungry. I sacrificed for them -_- I taught Darwisya and at the same time took pictures of Mikail, who then put his finger on my camera lens and got fingerprints all over it =_=

Then, when I went to get some more food, Mikail followed me and posed. It was so funny so I took pictures of him while i got my foods. At the distance, I saw Darwisya gave me that jealous look because I gave more attention to Mikail. Haihhh -_- So I spent my time at Opah Chik's house entertaining this kids while the others were in the dining table, singing and guessing song while Yas played his guitar. Real fun.

But I guess being with kids can be kinda fun. I mean, well, not to brag, but they both like meeeeee :D haha, at least babysitting kids can teach me some stuff to deal with my kids later on :)

Kids are annoying at times, but if you did it right (even with little chaos), you can still enjoy it, like I do :)

Lost 5kg, gained 10 kg.

2010-09-11T23:20:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum,

I haven't update my blog since the last day of Ramadhan, and I miss it so muchhh :) Anyways, skip those emotional "I miss you you miss me" part and lets get to the story, shall we?

Well, I spent the last day of Ramadhan with my grandmother in Kajang. It was fun I, she cooked my favourite fish and my dad bought me the briyani I always wanted (but I have to share it with my 'beloved' sister, but it's okay). I was satisfied, alhamdulillah :)

I realized I wanted a lot during Ramadhan. Yes, nafsu membuak-buak sungguh. I wanted to eat nasi lemak, nasi dagang, nasi tomato, lasagna, macaronni and cheese, nasi ayam, and lots more :) But even with those cravings, I managed to lose 5kg this Ramadhan, Allah knows how happy I am with that :D

On the first Syawal, we visited my grandma's neighbour and she cooked nasi lemak for us. After eating those nasi lemak, they took out lasagna, carrot cake, chocolate cake and tiramisu. I was like... "Oh God, did they read my mind or what?" But I only managed to grab a piece of lasagna. I need to save some room for other houses people ! :)

The next stop, Tok Su's house ! They made nasi ayam and macaronni and cheese. Exactly what I wanted eh? Huhu, the nasi ayam was tasty and the macaronni and cheese was unbelievable ! It's just too bad they made it with beef. I cannot eat beef so I had to put away most of the inti. Basically, I only ate the macaronni, and the cheese :) Fatty, I know.

Then, Tok Ngah's house. The dish looked amazing but I was too full to eat that much. Tok teh made nasi dagang and Mak Ngah Cheta made nasi tomato. Again, I got what I wanted :) Alhamdulillah again !! :) but I love Tok Ngah's house. At that house alone, I managed to collect RM75 ! :) That's the advantages going to the rich people's house. One sampul duit raya contains about RM20, 3-4 sampuls? All this really burns my spirit to celebrate raya more :D

After that, we travelled to Batu Gajah, Perak. I was so hyper throughout the journey. I sang, I talked, I asked my parents to turn up the sound of the radio, and laughed at even the stupidest jokes (too much sugar I guess)
XD
But when we nearly reach Batu Gajah, I suddenly shut up and fell asleep (haha, budak habis tenaga). My parents were kinda relieved.

Everyone was waiting for us at Batu Gajah. When we reached there, they brought us to the kitchen and we ate the soto and the curry mee. My mom quickly grabbed my opah's ketupat before it ran out. She told me that the only reason she did not eat that much at other houses was because she wanted to eat a lot of my opah's ketupat. Hoho, but I do not eat any. I have no idea why people can like ketupat and lemang, ughhh.

So, I took the whole month to get rid of those extra 5 kilos but it took one day to gain it all back. Like Mr.A said, I lost 5kg in Ramadhan and gains 10kg in Syawal. Dear people, I hate it when he's right. Pray that he's wrong, gaining another 5 kg will be a complete nightmare -_-

Seriously, I was so full that I cannot see any other food or I will puke :(

On the bright side, I managed to gain lots of duit raya and I got all that I ever wanted. Alhamdulillah, thank You so much ya ALLAH :)

Better go now, bye people :)

Assalamualaikum.

Syurgamu Ramadhan :)

2010-09-08T14:55:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Today is the last day of Ramadhan. Ya Allah, it's true that time is flying but it seems to be too fast. Without me realizing it, I'm going to celebrate Syawal tomorrow, and then taking my PMR and then celebrating my freedom from PMR, doing nothing for quite some months and getting nervous all over again for PMR results, at that time, I'm going to see whether I'm gonna the tears of joy, or the tears of regret. Gah, lets forget about that and enjoy the time we have for now okay?

I'm going to Kajang today so there's possibilities that I cannot online for days :( I'm going to miss my blog so much. And on the first raya, I'm going to travel to Batu Gajah, Perak. I miss everyone there so I am so looking forward for this :) Batu Gajah, here I come !! And dear people in Batu Gajah, save some food for us okay?

But surely, I'm going to miss Ramadhan so much. Like I said in previous blog posts, this Ramadhan really brought me to my senses and changed me to better person. I am now a changed woman. Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah for the hidayah :D

And dear Allah, please help me to get better for the rest of my life. I need You, I cannot do this alone. :)

By the way, I watched the drama Syurgamu Ramadhan, that came to its final episode yesterday. The ending was nice I guess, just too rushed. Everyone became nice of all the sudden but still, that's my favourite drama, after Nur Kasih of course! :)

Oh, and I'm sooooooo relieved that the Yassin character came to his senses and apologized to his wife instead of getting back together with that Adura. HAHAHA XD Pertama kali aku tengok drama yang watak utamanya seorang suami yang dayus ouhh :) *haha, nampak sgt kau jarang tgk drama syahirah*

I think I write too much already :) Goodbye for now, assalamualaikum :D

Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir dan batin :)

2010-09-07T15:43:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Aidilfitri is just around the corner and now, I've got so much kad raya tags in Facebook :) Thank you guys, I really appreciate it. Quite touched that you guys still remember me :)

Anyways, I will be spending my raya in Batu Gajah, Perak. I miss everyone there so people, WAIT FOR ME ! :D Inspired by Nursyafinaz Kamal, I want to give a little bit of Raya speech for those who mean the world to me :D

Filzah Athirah - Babe, I'm so sorry for hurting you throughout this year, I know I was a little harsh towards you but you need to know, it's for your own good. If I ever make you cry or hurt by my actions, I'm sorry :( Just remember, you will ALWAYS be my best friend, forever and always :D Selamat Hari Raya babe, and have a happy holiday :D

Affiq Fittri - Affiq, I know I hurt you a lot this year. I was stubborn and so insecure. But it all because I love you too much *merah muka*. I'm so sorry for making you mad, for making you sad and everything. I know I can be such an idiot sometimes and thank you so much for coping with that :) Selamat Hari Raya, eat a lot so I won't be the only one who is 'bulat' :)

Nursyafinaz Kamal - Babe ! I was so touched reading your blog post ! Hee, I LOVE being your friend too and I love you babe ! Hehe, am I that scary when I'm moody? Syaff, I'm so sorry too if I ever hurt you feelings, or made you mad by teasing you with H :) I hope you know that it all is just a joke :D Have a happy holiday and enjoy your raya okay? I'll wait for your kuih raya after holiday, don't forget about it! :)

Nur Farah Mohamed Raffidi - Err, Farah, you know I'm always scared of you right? But you will always have my respect, and I really care about you. I'm sorry if I accidentally 'palau' you of all the sudden, sometimes I can be such a 'blur' person that I do not realize people around me :) Like you said, I am kinda slow :D I love you babe, have a happy Hari Raya :D Enjoy yeahh !

Shahidah Suliman - You are my BEST adviser. You helped me to get through that you-know-what situation and among all my friends, you understood me the best :) I know I hurt you a lot this year, and it kills me knowing that I haven't apologize when we fought a few months ago. Shida, I'm so sorry and thank you for everything :D I always feel better knowing that I have a friend like you to count on. Selamat Hari Raya Shida, take it easy with all the mercuns and the 'pop pops' *or whatever you call it*

Afiah Dilla - Dear, you have no idea how much I miss youuu :) We do not know each other for a long time but I always feel we've known each other for YEARS :D You're always there for me when I cried, you always give me strength when I'm weak and I know I'm nothing without you. Thank you Fia, I really appreciate you company. Selamat Hari Raya babe , I'm sorry if I ever hurt your feelings by teasing you with.. err, you-know-who :) Again, have a happy Hari Raya :D

Nurul Munirah Hamdan - Eh, you never fail to make me laugh you know? You are one crazy girl and I always love you for that :D Mun, I'm sorry for the mistakes I did, for the the times I hurt your feelings.. I'm sorry okay? I pray for NaNa to speak to you againnnnnnnnnnn :) Selamat Hari Raya Mun, maaf zahir dan batin :)

Aina Amirah dan Bissmi Roziana - Haha, since you both are like twins so I decided to write your names in one :) Bissmi, thank you so much for the kad raya :) It seems to me that you're the only one that keeps the traditions of kad raya continuing. And the kad raya is beautiful, thanks babe :) Aina, hee, you're the most honest of all and I really enjoy my times with you. Thanks babes, for being nice to me :) Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir dan batin.

Abdul Muhaimin Latif - Haha, I know you must be shocked to see you name in my list :) Hey, I haven't thank you enough for keeping me company when I'm bored, or when I'm sad. When he's not there for me, you're there for me and I really appreciate it. Thank you for your advices, thank you for you company and thank you for everything! I'm sorry if I ever hurt you feelings and all sorts. All the best okay, and have a happy hari raya :)

Aliff Wardi - Hey :) I know that you're not reading this but what the heck :) I know I kinda hurt you recently when I kinda keep away from you. I have no idea why I did that but I'm sorry. Thanks again for keeping me company when I'm bored or when I'm angry and I need someone to unleash my anger at :D Selamat Hari Raya :) Maaf zahir dan batin.

Who else?

Siti Nur Aishah Izzati Khamaruzzaman

Nurul Nadiah Najman

Nurul Zuriah Afifah

Nurhaznita Hassan

Nurhaslinda Nurdin

Faiz Zarif Chok

Luqman Hosni

Iqraq Kamal

Nur Baizura Bardi

Nur Edora

Khairul Ikhwan

Izzati Rosly

Ereena Nadjmin

Iqmal Najmi Roseli

Siti Nazirah Abdul Ghani

Nurul Nabila Rudy

Fareezuan Adnan

Farah Aina

Nor Hasanah

Izzati Idris

GUYS ! I LOVE YOU ALL ! Sorry I cannot write much about you guys as my hands are darn tired right now. But anyways, Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir dan batin. Have fun this hari raya yahh :)

Friends like you guys are hard to find and I appreciate every single one of youuuu :) I love you guyssss ! :D

-And to all my blog followers, thank you so much for your support :D I love you guys, isk2 :)

And TO ALL ! SELAMAT HARI RAYA, MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN :)

Ramadhan is leaving us :(

2010-09-05T14:44:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Heee, semua orang macam excited gila nak raya ni, tak macam aku. Tapi apa-apa pun, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri :) Aku wish awal, sebab malas nak update banyak-banyak lepas ni, PMR lah weh, PMR. Entah aku ada masa ke tak nak update lagi blog ni, so kalau korang nampak blog ni macam berhabuk ke apa, tolonglah lapkan ye? Haha, kidding, maksud aku, errr, paham-paham ajelah.

Aku sedih Raya dah hampir tiba, which means Ramadhan dah nak berakhir :( Kalau boleh aku TAK NAK Ramadhan ni berakhir ouh. "Kau ni gilalah Syahirah, takkan tu pun nak sedih", mesti korang nak cakap macam tu kat aku kan? Haihh, honestly, banyak sungguh dugaan yang Allah turunkan untuk aku Ramadhan ni, banyak pengajaran aku pelajari, banyak sungguh perubahan yang aku buat. Dan aku suka perubahan tu, aku asah diri aku menjadi insan yang lebih baik (ecehh, ayat tak boleh bla) masa Ramadhan ni tapi, entah perubahan tu boleh tahan sampai tak sampai lepas raya. Aku tak kuat, aku tahu. Puasa pada bulan Ramadhan ni benar-benar mengajar aku erti kesabaran, erti ketabahan, erti cinta yang sebenar dan erti kasih Allah yang tak berbelah bagi pada kita semua. Agak-agak aku akan ingat lagi tak semua ni masa Syawal menjelang nanti? Apakah aku akan lupa diri?

Entahlah, the future is yet to come, but I'm still freaked out about it. I just hope I'll be strong enough to face the godaan from those syaitan durjanas yang akan terlepas bila habis Ramadhan ni. Huuhhh :'(

Aku cuma nak jadi insan yang lebih baik, tapi... berjayakah aku?

Ermm, dan aku rasa aku takkan beraya pun raya ni. PMR en, entah aku teringin ke tidak mengunjung saudara mara, makan kuih raya dan kutip DUIT RAYA (punca pendapatan aku tuuu). Grrr, depressed la weh, depressed -_-

Aku rasa aku dah cukup merepek. Aku sure 100% korang mesti kata, "Syahirah tu makan ubat batuk banyak sangat kot" HAHAHAHAHA XD Okay okayy, aku stop dulu sebelum korang naik muak okay? Assalamualaikum, goodbye :)

p.s Eh, I have this light, pink baju kurung and it is beautiful. It was my baju raya when I was in Standard 4 or 5 but I stopped wearing it because it looked too big on me. But I tried it back on yesterday and it's a perfect fit :) I wonder what that means :) *baju tu mengecil kot, HAHA*

Err, ni siapa?

2010-09-05T02:24:00.000-07:00

Haha, cantik tak aku make up kan dia? :D Sape dia ni? errr, pandai-pandailah korang teka XD

Don't be sad, why should you? :)

2010-09-04T14:28:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I'm currently reading a book called "Don't Be Sad" :) Masya-Allah, the book really inspires me. It taught me a lot about facing difficulties. Alhamdulillah, I always feel better after reading the book. So friends, just remember, no matter how hard God's test for you, there's always another person in this world who face more difficulties than you.

And be thankful for what you have. Allah gave us the best gift we could ever imagine, we can see, we can talk, we can walk, we can hear, we can smell. Would you trade your ability to see just for gold as high as Mount Uhud? Or would you trade your ability to listen for a big castle? Think about it and be thankful for what God has given you.

Besides, there's no point of being sad anyway. Hold on the saying, "Today is MY day" . Forget about the past, and tomorrow's still a mystery. We might not be living tomorrow. Live to day like you're gonna die in the end of it. Forget about the past that will just make you sad. It's like you're having a warm, fresh bread today, so why remember and cry about the cold, rotten bread yesterday?

And don't be too hasty and rushed for things that have yet to past. Do you think it is wise to pick fruits before they become ripe? Think about it :)

I will write more about things I learnt in this book from now on.

Credits to the great writer, 'Aaidh ibn Abdullah al-Qarni for writing this book. Your writing really inspires me and a lot of people out there. Thank you Sir, you have my greatest respect :)

Assalamualaikum :D

TIGA RK SATU XD

2010-09-03T20:09:00.001-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

3RK1 ! :) Familiar with that?

Heee, I have no idea why I wanna write about my class of all the sudden. I don't know, I miss them so much already (ceh, cuti baru start,lek ar syahirah)

Hehe, well, since that certain someone wrote about her class in her blog, and praised about her class in her blog, and even 'perli' one of my friends in her blog, I think I wanna do the same. I think it's better writing about my wonderful class than trashing about her in my bloggg :)

Heeee, 3RK1, stands for 3 Rancangan Khas 1 (RANCANGAN KHAS OKE ! BUKAN PENDIDIKAN KHAS) :D So, people would consider us to be smart, brainy, nerdy, sombong and all sort of crap. Heyy, you're wronggg :) We're not that smart (Dhanusya is not included) , we're not that brainy, we're not that nerdy, and most of all, we're NOT SOMBONG. Choyy, they're the one who are too embarrassed to talk to us, we're cool, we'll talk to everyone.

We have fun, we do not study all the time (seriously, who does?) and sometimes we act like complete retards together. We are one, and we will always be :)

So what some people keeps comparing us to class X? So what they think class X gets better grades than us? So what ? I know I'm in the best class ever, the most wonderful class I could ever imagine could be in. I love my class, and if they dare to talk bad about my class, I'll never hesitate to kick that person's ***.

Class X is nothing compared to us okay? Forget about them, lets just keep our head held high and just play deaf when people still comparing us to them (pstfff, good luck with that). What's so good about them anyway? From my observations, they're just too proud of those little achievements they got. Choyyyy -_- *tak nak cakap lebih-lebih, benci benci gak, tapi dorang baik gila dengan aku, haihhh*

It's just upsets me knowing that we're not going to be together next year :( Some of them 'menggedik' nak pindahlah, apa lah, waaaaa, I wanna cryyyyy :( But it's okayyy, lets just enjoy this moment, shall we? Like they said, make hay while the sun shines :) *erk, betul tak?*

Basically, I love my class, my friends are awesome :) and the teachers,

Puan Zaleha - Our class teacher, the sweetest teacher I've ever known my whole life :)

En. Hazri - Guru kesayangan pelajar perempuan 3RK1 :D

Cik Intan - Thank you so much for still holding up to our stupid questions during Geo classes :) Cikgu amat penyabar cikgu :D Saya respect cikgu.

Puan Sri Rahayu - Teacher, I love you the mossssttttt !!! :) You're my favorite !

Puan Sulhaniza - Haha, cikgu, if it wasn't for you, I'd never get the high marks for Science, you're my inspiration :)

Puan Chong - Teacherr, you're too nice until I'm feeling so guilty to hate Maths :)

Ustazah Zaida - Ustazah, ustazah penyabar sangat :) Sejuk hati saya tengok ustazah tahu?

Puan Asmah - Cikgu, walaupun saya selalu complain tentang cikgu, KH tetap menjadi satu subjek yang saya sentiasa berusaha dengan gigih untuk dapat A. Saya hargai cikgu, terima kasih cikgu :)

See? We've got wonderful teacher that always tries to help us for that PMR. So teachers, I'm sorry for all wrong doings, and thank you so much for all that you thought me, I appreciate you, and I will never forget that.

So, 3RK1, I'll never forget you, and thank you so much for these precious memories :)

Assalamualaikum :D

Class X and Secret Admirer !

2010-09-02T22:21:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Heee, today was fun ! When I got into school, I can actually feel the excitement, and by excitement, I mean Shida's excitement :) Like I said, she's excited because S was one of the pembaca Al-Quran for Majlis Khatam Al-Quran this morning.

I was quite excited too, I thought it's going to be fun. But I was... kinda wrong. I thought I will listen to some nice, beautiful voices reciting the Quran today but.. ceh, hampeh! Most of them either read too slow, too loud, too fast, or too... whatever lah. I did not enjoy it as much as I thought I would be. Plus, I sat next to the talkative girls, who made lots of noises and one of them even asked me a stupid question ; " Eh, kau tak masuk ke tadarus ni?"

Ishhh, I was sitting there, and all that were participating should be on the stage. Wasn't it obvious that I was not participating? Haiyaaa !

Maybe I was exaggerating, I wasn't in a good mood this morning as my throat hurts so badly. I think I'm going to fall sick. Hishh, but I do not want to see the doctor :(

Anyways, there were some boys recited the Quran nicely. I won't mention names though, kang nanti ada yang kembang kang :)

After tadarus, I went back into class and talked to Faiz about his recent blog post about class X :) Waaa, I love it Faiz ! It's everything that I wanted to sayyyyyyy !!! Serves that class right, I always hated that class anyway. There's one boy in this class, grrr, he's so rude ! Honestly saying, he's never nice to me, EVER ! I still remember last year, he asked me to do this thing that's supposed to be HIS JOB, but he asked me to do it. Trying to be the good guy here, I said I'll do it for him. He said thanks and walked away. But the next day, he asked me if I did that job or not, and I answered yes. He told me to paste it on the board but since I was in such a hurry to somewhere else, I told him that I'll paste it later and went away with Mary. But then he yelled "WOI ! BUATLAH CEPAT !"

Grrr, I helped you but you yelled at me? Seriously, where were your manners?

And teachers kept praising this class, blah blah blahhhh, just because they exceeded some high level, but my class that reached those levels big time, never got any compliments. Hishh, I'm too lazy to write more about this kaki bodek class, more kutukan in blog Faiz.

Oh, one more HOT STORAYYYY ! My friend, E, has a secret admirer !!

Haha, we've known this guy as her secret admirer *or stalker* for quite a long time. He often stares at E with dreamy eyes, calls E whenever he got the chance and all sorts.

Today, we got to know him :) His name is Am (not real name). Haha, Mary met him when she went to teacher's room to give some Raya cards. He talked to her and asked her about E. He told Mary that he liked E for a very long time, that he's so crazy about E, he cannot sleep, cannot eat, cannot concentrate on his exams just because he keeps thinking about E. Shida and I laughed so hard listening to Mary's story :D Across the class, we saw him staring at E instead of answering his exams. We laughed to hard !! XD

E's expression was PRICELESS ! It's either flattered or freaked out. But I'm sure mostly freaked out :) Mary told us that he asked if E likes him or not. Urgh, of course not (haha, poor guy) and we told E to give him a chance. Err, not we, it's mostly Mary and Shida. I wanted to say the truth, and tell Am that E loves G :) But they're too nice meh, they wanted to take care of this guy's feelings. Haiyaaa, so we had to lie. We just told him that E was broken hearted before by this one guy that she'll have a hard time trusting guys ( LOL ! We're such dramaqueens)

After school, we told Am that and you know what he said? He said "You know what, tell her that if she couple with me, she'll be happy" in a very threatening tone. I know that he's a gangster but who on earth do you think my friend is? You cannot force E to be together with you ! Urghhh !!! PSYCHOOOOO !!!

Hishhh, and when Mary tried to tell him that there's no chance for him, he just quickly went away, not listening to whatever Mary's saying and seemed to be very determined to have E. May I say it again? yeah, PSYCHOOO !!!

He really should know his place here. He's talking to Mary, E's closest person, and me, E's friend. We have all the power to make E notice you, or HATE you. Soooo, choose :) *evil laugh*

Haha, Mary that used to be so pitiful of him suddenly hates him when he acted so rude. Even I hate him now. If it's really up to me, I'll tell the truth, that E loves G ! Grrrr...

I think I'll end my post now. If there's some words that offends you, I'm sorry. And pray for me to get well. I really cannot stand this cough :(

Assalamualaikum :D

I'm missing him

2010-09-02T14:34:00.001-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I miss my Mr.A :( He hadn't call for 5 days now and I miss his voice so damn much ! I miss him, how is he doing now, is he doing great, or there's girls there trying to flirt with him... (what am I thinking, of course there is) :( Grrr, it's hard being in a relationship with a hot guy like him, there's so much competitions and for a girl who got jealous so easily, I find it hard to hold back my tears when I miss him. I know, I'm a crybaby, waaaaaa :'(

Seriously, I need to stop getting jealous and.. ergh, stop being such a stalker -_- When I know there's some girl who likes him, I always track down that girl just to see how she's like. And as usual, I always got jealous when I found out that that girl is a much better girl that I am. I know I must do something right in my life to have a guy like him, loving me that much and ignore all those girls for me, but so far, I have no idea what I did but I'm sure that must be something realll nice because God gave me the best guy I could ever wish for.

I just hope we'll last forever, because I have no idea how painful it would be like if he walks out of my life. I fell in love completely with him and I really cannot imagine how it would be like without him. And I know I can never find another guy as great as he is, because I know myself, I'm not beautiful and no guy will ever fall for me. Him? Like I said, I have no idea why he fell for me, but I'd leave that to him, only he knows :)

I will always try to be the best for him, I'd sacrifice everything for him. That maybe sounds so desperate, but when you're in love, you'd do everything for the one that you love :)

Assalamualaikum.

The cat that falls in love,haha

2010-09-02T00:18:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

I'm so tired, tired of school, tired of studies, tired of stress, I'm tired of everything. Hurhh, like usual, I went to school, met my friends, talked about guys and went into class. The first subject was English, my favourite subject evaaaaaa :)

Teacher told us to do some exercises and discuss the answer with the friend beside us. Teacher told us to argue about our answers and we can make lots of noises if we want to. See? Yeah, I know my teacher's very cool. Suddenly Mary told me, " Yeah, yeah, we can argue but I'll win"

I said, "Oh yeah? Whatever, you always win before because you shouted and I got tired of listening to your shouting. You win because of your voice, not because you're better :p "

Then we argued and argued until teacher came to us. It's okay, it's normal. Mary and I always act like enemies but she's my very best friend :)

KH was as boring as ever. I completely shut down when teacher opened her mouth, and I mean that, literally. The moment she speaks, that's the time I come back to my dream guy in my dreamland :) Yeah, happy moments :)

Satisfied with my dream guy in my dreamland (korang jangan menggedik nak fikir lain) , I took Shida's book and wrote crap on it. You see, there's like examples of business forms in her book, so I just fill in the blank spaces with fictional characters. Like, the PNA 42 form, I created a business for Puteri Consuila binti Hamok, berketurunan Melanau dan berwarganegara Jepun serta tinggal di Rusia. Err, hahaha, merepek, I know :)

Then there's thing one cat, that kept coming into the class and went to Iqraq. I seriously have no idea why but it kept coming like..twice and kept on meowing outside the class when teacher closed the door to keep that cat away. Yeah, the cat falls in love with Iqraq, hahaha XD

But who on earth called the cat at the first place?

I adviced Filzah today. Hurh, I'm actually worried about her. I just hope she'll make the best decision and forget about all the emotions.

And I finally know what to wear for prefect's annual lunch. Heeee ~~ :) And really cannot wait until tomorrow :D The Majlis Khatam Al-Quran sounds interesting :D

p.s Eh, kalau aku tercarut tadi, sorry sangat :( Terlepas cakap, sorry sorry sorry !!!

Stop Insulting Malaysia, boleh tak?

2010-09-01T02:12:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

There's nothing much to tell actually, I'm just too bored but at the same time I want to cherish this break time from the revision the best that I could. Tonight, I'm going to tuition, urghh :( I hope there aren't many people are coming, I love tuition when there's only like.. 5-6 people in the class. I know, I'm bad but what to do?

As usual, I logged in into my Facebook dearest, and I saw this group, it supposed to be the anti-Indonesian who insulted Malaysia or something like that. Hurhh, but the wall, full of racism speeches, full of those stupid, uncivilized Indonesians who keep on insulting Malaysia. There are also pictures of our Sultan that they conteng , added pig nose to our Queen, putting ugly, naked body picture and pasted our Prime Minister's face on it, and pictures of our Jalur Gemilang surrounded by poops. Seriously, I was so mad and I felt like.... urghhh ! There hardly words to describe this.

I am currently so ashamed to have Javanese blood. I am Malaysian, and I'm proud to be one. And I am very protective of my country, I hate it when people insult my country.

Like my Sejarah teacher said, Indonesia is always jealous of us. Whatever, I know I live in better country, better people, and by that, I mean CIVILIZED people, and I'm proud to live in peaceful country like Malaysia :)

Seriously think about this, there are lots of Indonesian people would die of starve if they do not get jobs in Malaysia. Even that, they created lots of problems, and now this? Our leaders are too nice I should say. But still, that's smart people, they're very patient. I'm not that smart (I admit ok?) and maybe what I say will just add fuel to the fire. Urghh...

Whatever, I hate Indonesia and I will always be, okay? I know that's one country that I will not set my foot on.

Alhamdulillah, 8A :)

2010-08-31T22:47:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Haha, today's kinda fun. I reached school around 6.55 a.m, and when I got into canteen, I saw none of my friends were there. So I sat and waited for them. Shida then came and sat with me, followed by Aishaa and Nadiah. We talked and I told Shida that I saw S at soon as I reached school. She suddenly took note on what time I reached school. So, there's a possibility that I'm gonna see Shida tomorrow at school around 6.50 in the morning.

Then, we saw Luqman all by himself so Shida, Munie and me joined him. I saw S looking at Shida but she did not even care to look at him. Weird? Not really, I understand how embarrassing it is to look at someone you have a crush on, even when you know he's looking at you.

So, I got tons of homeworks to do this holiday. Grr, I cannot believe how close PMR is ! Waaaa, I'm not ready yet. Dear Ministry, can I have a little more time? Err, around 5 months, can? No? Waaaaa !!!

I almost slept during KH time. Not good, I know, but still, Puan Asmah's class is boringggggg :( I have no idea what on Earth was she talking about, and.. grrr, she kept talking and talking in front of the class, and I kept on drawing some sort on crap on a piece of paper. Seriously, I'm having so much trouble to concentrate in her class, and I'm not usually like this. Like last year, I focused a lot in Madam Lim's class. Why can't I focus in Puan Asmah's class? And teacher, if you read this, I'm sorry, I tried my best.

During recess, I talked to Faiz, Aina and others about class *tuuuuttt*. I won't tell what they said, but I want to say one thing, I hate class *tuuuuutttt* and I will always be. And another thing, I hate injustice. Oh another thing, don't be like 'ketam mengajar anaknya berjalan', alright?

Fareezuan then came into our class and talked about his idol, Siti Nurhaliza. He got to meet her, lucky him -_- When can I see my favorite artist? They're so far awayyyyyy :( No worries, I'm going to go to Ireland one day and meet them :)

Then, I chatted with Dhanusya, Chris, Mary and Chua. We talked about our first crushes. I cannot believe I still remember my first crush :) Heeee, I still see him nowadays, and he changed a lot, I do not like him that much anymoreeee :D And we talked about guys, and how much they misunderstand that girls like expensive stuff. Grrr, girls are not that complicated lah ! Give us something sweet, something sentimental, and something thoughtful. Those things mean much more that expensive materials (not that I would reject expensive materials though)

BM was fun, although I'm quite worried that I'm sitting right under the fan now. At first, it's nice because I'll never get hot, but today, those childish boys did something to the fan and it looks those moving at high speed fan gonna fall down any second. Whatever guys, if I die, I'll become a ghost and look for you guys, ONE BY ONE.

Got our full results today. Alhamdulillah, got 8A's and number 3 in class. Now, I had to fast for 7 more days, as I promised Allah that I will fast for 7days if I got 8A's and top 3 in class. Heee :) It's okayy, at least now I know He heard my prayers. Thank you Allah, alhamdulillah :) I love Youuuuuu !!

I better go now :) That's all for today. Assalamualaikum :D

p.s Grrr, saya TAK SUKA Puan Lextra a.k.a 'Leman'. Hurhh, sedap hati kau je jaja cerita pasal aku kan? Fitnahlah, fitnahlah, kau jawablah dengan Allah kiamat nanti ok?

The Rose

2010-08-31T05:45:00.000-07:00

A certain man planted a rose, and watered it faithfully and before it blossomed, he examined it.

He saw the bud that will soon blossom, but noticed the thorns upon the stems and thought, "How can any beautiful flower come from a plant burdened with such sharp thorns?"

Because of this thoughts, he gave up on the plant and stopped watering it. So, before the rose was ready to blossom, it died.

___________________________________________________________________

That's me. I always believe that there's a rose within me. But as I grow, I started to only see its thorns, and its defects.

I thought there will be nothing good can come out of me. I thought I'm useless. Like the man in the story, I forgot to water the good within me, and I never realize my potential.

I know there's a rose within me, but I just need someone to show it to me. Then, I met you, and you have this gift of reaching out pass the thorns and found the rose in me.

That's the characteristics of love :) You look into me, knew my true faults but still accepts me in your life. You are the only one that accepts me for who I am and I always appreciate that. And for that, I do not want to lose you, I do not want you to slip away from me. I always appreciate it and I will try my best to make you happy, even if that means I have to sacrifice.

I love you dear, I really do. And I miss you, every single second.

Mr.A, this is for you :)

Under pressure

2010-08-31T01:32:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Erghhh ! I'm so stressed out ! Grr, I did Maths earlier and grrr, it's so damn hard :( I wanna cry. It's now only 1 month before PMR and I'm still in this takuk lama. Grrr, what should I do? I'm trying so hard but none is working. God, please help me :(

Aishh, and now, my Sejarah notes are nowhere to be found. Can I scream now? Can? Okay thanks. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!! Allahuakbar :(

Right now, I'm sweating like mad, I'm panicking looking at the calendar, I wanna scream looking at the Maths exercise book, I wanna punch someone so badly, I wanna pull out my hair, I wanna... erghh, panic attack ! :(

Waaa, I screwed up my Form 3 year so badly, that I am actually looking forward to close this chapter and get into Form 4. Yeah, Biology, Chemistry, Physics, what else? I'm actually looking forward for those <-- Although I am 100% sure I'm gonna laugh reading this statement next year.

My target is so high and I'm almost crushed under pressure right now. My doctor said, if you want to achieve success, always, ALWAYS aim high. It's like.. you want to jump high, so target the ceiling, do not just target half the room. If your target is only half the room, there's a possibility that you're not even going to reach half the room. But if you target the ceiling, there's possibility you'll exceed half the room. I simply nodded when he said that and I forgot to ask him one simple question : what if you die when you're trying to jump to the ceiling?

Crazy la you Syahirah :D HAha, I knowwww <>

p.s I screwed up and now I have to face the consequences. Urghh.

I do not understand -_-

2010-08-30T21:55:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Hey, today's holidayyyy :D Haha, thank God. I really really need a break from school right now. I have no idea why, but lately, whenever I come to school, I always suffer from severe headache when I got home. Hurhh, maybe it's the heat whatsoever but still, urghhh !

I basically gonna write in English from now on. Why? Errr, I told you right, my English is getting worse and if I do not start practicing soon, I'm deaddddd. My dad's gonna kill me if I start to have this some sort of broken english thingy which I used to have when I was in standard 1,2,3,4,5,6 again :) Hey, I used to hate English you know. I actually REFUSED to learn English but my dad made me to learn it anyways. But still, I'm glad he did

Anyways, I woke up for sahur today and I saw fried chicken mommy made. Arhhh ! I love it, so I quickly wash my hands and dig in :D It was a bliss. Heee, then I took my laptop and checked my Facebook. Then, I read some blogs and found something interesting. I have no idea how true this is, but I read that Gaga's illuminati puppet?

Whatever it is, I'm not listening to Gaga anymore. Ish, damn you Gaga, I used to love you so much. I loved your song. Even I first heard Alejandro, I quickly texted Aliff and said "Aliff I heard Alejandro and it was uh-mazing! " And now I found out that the song has something to do with this illuminati thingy, haihh, you broke my heart Gaga, you really do. Ah, whatever lah, there's so much other singers which actually believe in God.

Seriously, what on Earth are these people thinking? Why would you actually worship other than God? Huuh, ya Allah, help me to avoid syirik. That's the one thing that I'm actually afraid of. Ya Allah, apa-apa jadi, aku takkan curang dengan Kau ok? I know there's no God besides You. Engkaulah yang Maha Esa :D Lailahaillallah :)

My dad keeps buzzing me on Facebook and urges me to study. So, I better go now :) Bye, assalamualaikum :D

p.s Again, sorry kalau English berterabur.

Independence Day yaww :)

2010-08-30T21:29:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Tanggal 31 Ogos, tarikh keramat untuk semua rakyat Malaysia. Tarikh kita mencapai kemerdekaan setelah beratus-ratus tahun dijajah kuasa asing. Tarikh di mana kita finally dapat memerintah negara kita sendiri.

Ya, memang aku hargai tarikh ini :) Bila baca balik buku Sejarah semalam, aku tersentuh dengan pengorbanan serta perit jerih yang terpaksa tokoh-tokoh kita lalui untuk mendapatkan kemerdekaan. Tak lupa juga dengan pejuang-pejuang yang berkorban nyawa untuk mendapatkan kemerdekaan bagi tanah air tercinta ini :D

Ya, aku amat bangga dilahirkan dalam bumi bertuah ni. Kita hidup, aman dan makmur. Tiada perbalahan (ceh, kalau ada pun, itu dilakukan oleh orang yang tak bertamadun) dan tiada perpecahan :) Alhamdulillah, sepanjang aku hidup, tak ada lagi aku lihat Malaysia ini diserang atau apa-apa.

Haihh, apa-apa pun, selamat menyambut kemerdekaan :)

p.s Aku pun tak tahu kenapa ayat aku skema sangat. Jadi, JANGAN TANYA :)

Love and Hypocrisy

2010-08-29T22:30:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Heee, I grabbed my laptop as soon as I reached home :) Seriously, I have so much to tell.

I thought the assembly was cancelled today as the Form 4 students are taking their exam, so I was kinda excited when I saw the empty stage in the morning. Then, Kak Syafinaz told me that the assembly's still on and it was held in blok baru. God knows how crushed I was.

I think the assembly was the celebration for National Day tomorrow, or not. Either way, I did not pay any attention so I have no idea what it's for. Not that I care anyway :)

Skip until PAI time, shall we? I talked with Filzah, Shida and Zuriah during PAI, and suddenly, we saw NZ outside our class. Oh gosh he's handsome :) Our luck, he stopped by our class with Hizal to talk to the prefects about something. I thought they're going to take us to the computer room as Ruben promised us a slideshow about the outfits for our annual lunch.

Turns out, they only wanted to inform us to take 'bubur lambuk' at the canteen after school. I got back into class and saw Shida being as giddy as a school girl :) She seemed to be so excited about something and I asked her why. Well, NZ talked to her ! Gosh, I'm so jealous :p , lucky her :) Seriously, you should see Shida at that time. Her knees suddenly became weak and she's like.. well, almost 'berguling' on the floor. Gosh, Shida and her excitement... cannot be described by words :D

Then ,we chatted and Filzah asked, how does it feels like when your crush that you admire from far finally talks to you. I found it quite surprising as ... oh forget it. Filzah's crush always likes her back. Grr, she's so lucky (jealous ni). As for me, I haven't felt what Shida felt when NZ talked to her for a very long time. I mean, why should I feel that when I already have Mr. A? The last time I felt that was when I had a huge crush on you-know-who.

I used to be so crazy about him. He's not that far away, he's just... so near, yet so far. I knew him for almost 3 years now, and I only talked to him for... like 3 or 4 times.

Come to think of it, I used to like him so much, I think he's great, I saw his best side no one ever care to see and I used to think that I would sacrifice everything to talk to him. And now... I ask myself, WHAT ON EARTH WAS I THINKING?

Grrr, things you would to for the ones you love :) Haha, crushed on him for 2 years, and he did not even notice me (so saaaaaadddd ) but Allah gave me something better. I got to know Mr.A and he turns out to be the best guy I ever met. People always ask why am I still with him, he hurts me quite a number of times, and I cried a lot for Mr.A. Simple, sometimes when you love someone so much, and he means everything for you, you would forgive him and try to let go, simply because you still want him in your life.

Mr. A, I misshhhh youuuuu :)

Heee, and then, I talked to Maryleen about hypocrisy. Seriously, I hate it when she calls me a hypocrite. You see, she's been avoiding this guy for quite a long time now, since this guy is close to 'Leman' and he's turning into 'Leman'. I do not like 'Leman' too and I showed 'Leman' that I do not like him. But this guy, he's nice to me. Sure, he's annoying at times but I'm still okay with him. But Maryleen is not.

She avoids him, she ignores him when he speaks to her... And when I asked her why, she said she's not a hypocrite and she does not want to show him that she's annoyed by him. She then called me a hypocrite for being nice to him while inside, I'm actually very annoyed by him. I tried to deny it but I have no idea why I couldn't. That's why I told her, since you do not like him , why don't you just talk to him face to face and tell him to leave you alone. You keep on avoiding him simply because you do not want him to know that you do not like him, isn't that also a hypocrite?

I know I'm not a hypocrite, because I'm okay with him. Even with 'Leman', I'm not being entirely nice like I used to. He's annoying in every single way and I prayed to God that he's out from this school next year. I really really cannot stand seeing his face. And I cannot stand faking a smile when he talks to me too -_-

So, what do you guys think? What should I do?

I'll leave that to you. Until then , adios :)

Assalamualaikum.

p.s Sorry kalau English berterabur :)

Today ..

2010-08-29T05:43:00.001-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Today is not a good day. I woke up with terrible soar throat and my neck ache like hell -_- If it's up to me, I would not wake up for sahur.

But I did and sahur felt kinda different since Nur Kasih ended and there's nothing interesting to watch during sahur :) My mother turned on Prima (or Ria) channel instead and we watched Berbagi Suami, an Indonesian film. Grr, I hated that movie and I found it extremely disgusting. So, I went back to my comfy mattress and surfed the Internet. Facebook was dull in the morning as there weren't many people there.

After Subuh, I went back to sleep and woke back up at 10 o'clock. I know, early right? :)

Took my shower and went back to my lovely laptop :D I watched quite a number of videos today and some of it were extremely offensive. One of the videos that really pissed me off was a video of some dumb girls making fun of zikir. Erghh, seriously lah, you're wearing tudung, and it's obvious that you're Muslim, then you made fun of zikir? What on Earth were you guys thinking?

It disappoints me that some of the Muslims expect the non-Muslims to respect Islam but they themselves do not. What's happening to this world -_-

I waited for his call whole day but he did not call. I hate this :( But credits for Filzah and Muhaimin for keeping me company :) At least I didn't feel that lonely :D

My English sucks -_- seriously, I used to write so easily in English but now, urghh, so... hard ! I took more time that I used to take to write and I'm more concerned of my tenses ( I used to not to). What's happening to me? :(

I changed a lot you know? I used to be so hardworking, I even used to LOVE homeworks. The more homework I get, the happier I'd be. Now, I prefer to stay inside the room, away from everybody, alone with my lovely computer and cellphone and write my heart out in my diary. Books? Urghh..

I want to get to my old self back but... haihh :(

Pasar Ramadhan PKNS Bangi :)

2010-08-28T09:02:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Haha, itulah kerja aku. Tulis satu post, publish and then delete. Kadang-kadang orang tak sempat nak baca pun, aku dah delete. Annoying bukan? Err, ekceli, kalau boleh aku tak nak lah blog aku dipenuhi dengan penulisan merapu, besar nanti aku nak baca juga blog aku ni, aku tak nak lah gelak sampai pecah perut tengok betapa childishnya aku sekarang :)

Biarlah, anyways, hari ni aku dengan rajinnya pakai baju kurung warna kuning and bertudung hitam labuh lalu pergi ke pasar Ramadhan depan PKNS Bangi. Okayy, panasnya hanya Allah yang tahu. Serious aku tak tahu kenapa aku tiba-tiba rajin pakai baju kurung kuning yang tak pernah-pernah aku nak pakai dulu. Haha, hari ni terdetik hati aku nak pakai, and then bila pakai, aku nampak kurus so aku pakai je la baju tu jalan-jalan (hey, I answered my own question). Kini, aku insaf, panas pakai baju kurung tu... allahuakbar -_-

Banyak sungguh gerai kat pasar ramadhan tu :) Memang aku dah rambang mata nak pilih yang mana, tapi aku diam aje, tunggu ayah aku sedar aku nak something. Habis-habis, tak dapat apa-apa pun. Siapa suruh aku diam bila dia tanya? Ngeng sungguh kau Syahirah, ngengg ! Control ayu konon -_-

Heyy, pakai baju kurung dan bertudung labuh, aku nampak macam ustazah kat pasar ramadhan tu tahu?! Boleh lagi penjaja tu panggil aku 'kak'. Grrr, sikit punya sakit hati daaa. At least kira okay lah, aku nampak ramai sungguh pakai tudung yang tak tutup penuh kat pasar ramadhan tu tadi. Bikin sakit mata aje -_- Seriously lah para wanita, kalau nak pakai tudung, silalah pakai tudung yang menutupi dada anda. Saya suka tengok anda bertudung, tapi tengok aurat anda tak bertutup penuh, sakit mata saya tahu tak? Anda rasa saya menyibuk? Okay fine, suka hati andalah. Akhirat nanti anda jawablah sendiri dengan Allah okay? :)

Esok cuti lagi, yeayy :) Aku nak tidur puas-puas ouh. Apa? Apa? Ulangkaji? PMR? Apakah itu?

Haha, main-main ajelah :D Selagi boleh, aku taknak ingat pun pasal PMR tu, bikin sakit perut je. Eh, ini baru sikit. Bayangkanlah, macam mana aku nak tidur pada 4 Oktober nanti? Erghhh, entah dapat tidur ke tak?

PMR, kau tak perlu datang lahhh :) Aku tak rindukan kau punnnn < 3

p.s kalau aku ambil je exam tu tanpa tahu result, boleh tak? :)

The Handsome One

2010-08-26T02:03:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Ish, serious tak seronok nak berblogging sekarang ouh. Biasanya, sebelum aku menulis/merapu dalam blog aku ni, aku jalan-jalan ke blog followers aku yang setia gila gaban ni :) Haha, aku puji korang ni, sila kembang ye?

Tapi lately, ramai malas nak update, and mostly, asal nak buka je, ada aje perkataan 'malware detected'. Annoying tahu? Hilang selera aku nak membaca -_-

Eh, biarlah. Anyways, hari ni ada ceramah agama. Esok Nuzul Quran :) Honestly, ustaz bagi ceramah tu lawak. Dan truthfully, aku tak ingat nama dia, sebab otak aku tengah melayang kat mana tapi aku ingat dia kata nama dia 'The Handsome One'. Choyy, nasib baik dia betul-betul handsome, kalau tak dah lama aku cari baldi :)

- and suara dia.. ya Allah, cair jugalah hati aku :D

Sebijik-sebijik orang yang lambat datang kena dengan dia. Siap kena perli lagi depan orang ramai. Aku tersenyum puas, finally dorang dapat malu. Haha, kejamkah aku ? Aku rasa mereka lagi kejam kot, dah nama pun datang lewat, bukanlah budak baik kan? Bila bukan budak baik, korang expect mereka nak bersopan-santun dengan pengawaskah? Jadi sekarang ni siapa yang kejam? Aku ada pengalaman dengan budak lewat ni, so aku tahu apa yang aku cakap.

Ustaz tadi cakap something pasal Al-Quran, yang mana ramai remaja sekarang makin mengabaikan Al-Quran. Ishh, insaf aku. Dulu aku baik gila kot, rajin sungguh baca Quran, sekarang... *muhasabah diri*.. Dah-dah, habis PMR aku nak belajar Quran betul-betul, siapa nak join?

Ustaz tu juga kata yang remaja sekarang banyak meng-idolakan benda lain. Contoh : kartun. Dia boleh bagi contoh kartun Ninja Boy tu, dan setiap soalan yang dia tanya, selamba derk je dorang jawab, laju pula tu. Shida, anda terasa kah? :) Haha, tergelak-gelak kot aku dengan kelajuan Shida menjawab soalan berkaitan Ninja Boy tuuuuu :D HAHAHAHAHAH !

- PERHATIAN ! Shin Bei aku punya :)

Dan tadi kelas Perdagangan bergabung dengan kelas Kemahiran Teknikal. Geli hati kot ! Aku duduk dengan Maryleen, and korang patut tengok muka dia. Nampak sangat dia tengah bengang dengan Puan Asmah. Eh, tengoklah, cikgu tu kalau bagi jawapan, sikit punya panjang dia ceramah. Nampak sangat budak KT mengantuk, budak PK okay lagi, dah itu yang kitorang TERPAKSA lalui setiap hari Selasa selepas masa Sejarah okay?

Tahap kebosanan Maryleen membawa beliau untuk berusaha mencabut satu paku berkarat yang sudah lama berada di meja yang aku duduk. Tak pernah-pernah aku berjaya cabut paku tu, tapi Mary berjaya. Nampak sangat dia bosan bukan?

Masa balik, aku boleh pula argue dengan Filzah. Haihhh :) Serious aku rindu arguing dengan dia ouhh. Lepas tu, dapat berita yang markah kerja kursus KH takkan dicampur dengan markah trial. Cisss ! Habis 90% aku ! Serious rasa macam nak mencarut je kat PPD tu, tapi nasib baik bulan puasa, haha :)

- Sekarang dorang selaraskan 80% A untuk semua kelas. Alhamdulillah, aku 7A 1B. Maths 77%, sungguh kacau bukan?

Fun :)

2010-08-24T22:45:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Haha, lets go straight to the point alright? Just then, during BM time, the mat salleh boy walked pass my classroom. OhMG ! He's so cuteeeeeee ! Ya Allah, he looked at our class and smiled and I... well, I'm not sure what I did. I think I looked away, oh gosh, I'm so stupid ! Yeah, why didn't I smile back?

Honestly, Maryleen was so giddy -_- She smiled, she laughed, she giggled, she almost yelled when the mat salleh boy walked pass our class :) Haha, aku control lagi kot, gelak-gelak tu biasalah :) Haihh, talk about luck. And after that, we hardly pay any attention to what Encik Hazri was saying. Btw, guys, is there any homework today?

Another thing, during PAI period, which was the first period of the day, I walked in the class, took my seat and I saw Fareezuan came in. Well, he looked upset and without me asking, he suddenly told me about this certain teacher who scolded him in front of other teachers, which was a total embarrassment for him. I have no idea what was wrong with that teacher. Come on teacher, I know you have a bad temper, but please, I think you know better than scolding a pupil in public for one small matter.

Cried again today. Seriously Syahirah, what's wrong with you? Urgh, stop putting your life in jeopardy just because you're desperate for a man, boleh tak??!! *marah kat diri sendiri*

Haihh, and tadi, we talked to our beloved class teacher about class *tuttttttt*. Ishh, looking at their History results, okay, not to brag but come on ! You still want to compare OUR RESULTS to them??!! There's nothing to compare ! And STOP giving them credits, they're not that good !

- Sakit hati tahu tak? Asyik kena kutuk je -_- Macam tak ada benda lain lagi nak cakap.

I'll stop here. Need to get some rest -_-

Assalamualaikum.

I'm tired of getting hurt over and over again :(

2010-08-24T14:38:00.000-07:00

Salam :) Haha, pagi-pagi lagi aku dah depan komputer and menaip dekat blog ni. Bukan ada apa-apa pun nak cerita. Just.. entahlah.

Aku bingunglah, aku ingat aku dah redha dengan semuanya. Aku ingat aku dah tak kisah langsung apa akan terjadi. Aku ingat hati aku dah tenang kembali lepas dilanda badai beberapa hari lepas (ceh, jiwang gila) and mostly, aku ingat air mata aku dah kering lepas berapa banyak kali aku menangis tak berhenti.

Tapi tak, aku KISAH ! Hati aku masih tak tenang, air mata aku masih tak kering. Aku tak nak menangis lagi, hati aku perit bila teringatkan perkara tu. Kenapa aku macam ni? Salahkah aku sebab sayangkan dia? Salahkah aku sebab letak harapan tinggi untuk dia? Salahkah aku sebab jatuh cinta completely kat dia? Salahkah aku sebab tak sediakan diri aku untuk hadapi dugaan Allah yang sebesar ni?

Ish, susah gila kot nak kekang air mata dari jatuh. Aku tak pernah suka menangis, aku benci menangis. Tangisan bukan kawan aku, tangisan buat aku terasa pedih, terasa sakit :(

Aku penat pendam semuanya. Aku penat, asyik-asyik aku aje yang dilukai. Seumur hidup aku, hati aku asyik terluka aje, seumur hidup aku, asyik aku aje yang kena berkorban. Ya Allah, seumur hidup aku bagaikan satu ujian besar dari kau. Salahkah aku jika mengharapkan kebahagiaan?

Aku penat, hati aku tak tenang, sentiasa rasa tak sedap hati :( Ya Allah ! Bantulah hamba-Mu ini ! :(

Like A Virgin :)

2010-08-24T01:12:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Oh haha, hari ni aku banyak ketawa kot. Honestly, tak tahu kenapa :) But all that matters is, my depression decreased slightly and that's all that I need for now.

Dapat markah Geografi, Science dan Sejarah hari ni. Aku agak kecewa dengan dua-dua markah Sejarah dan Geografi aku. Macam pakat je, dua-dua 83%. Semua orang markah tinggi-tinggi, aku je yang 83, sedih tahu ! Tapi, kira alhamdulillah, dalam malas-malas aku ulangkaji (dan sebenarnya satu benda pun tak masuk kepala) dapat juga 83 :) Alhamdulillah :D

Haha, Science jangan cakaplah. Terkejut beruk aku tengok result aku. Seriously, aku mana belajar untuk Science, dahlah clash dengan subjek Pendidikan Islam, so aku lebihkan subjek tu sampai Science aku pinggirkan. Jadi doa aje yang aku bekalkan masa jawab Science :) Tengok-tengok dapat 95% :D Ya Allah ! Terima kasih ya Allah ! Alhamdulillah ! I love You I love You I love You ! Tak sangka Kau makbulkan juga doa aku :) Terima kasih ya Allah !

So far markah aku semua A kecuali Maths yang macam *tuuuuuutttt* tu. Hancur musnah harapan aku nak dapat 8A :( Tiba-tiba aje terselit B kat situ. Aishhh, bersyukur ajelah. Usaha aku tak kuat lagi kot, usaha lagi Syahirah, usaha ! Fighting ! (kenapa semangat tiba-tiba ni?)

Oh ya, lupa nak cerita. Tadi kan, aku dan Maryleen pergi tandas. Masa on the way nak pergi tandas tu, nampak sorang budak lelaki Pendidikan Khas ni masuk tandas perempuan tu. I was like.. "ewww ! " and then kitorang jenguk apa dia buat dalam tandas tu. And honestly, that was the STUPIDEST mistake we've done ! Eh, dengan muka selambanya budak lelaki tu buka seluar dia and masuk dalam salah satu kubikel tandas tu ! Apa lagi, aku dan Maryleen larilah ke tandas blok baru.

Dalam nak pergi tu, kitorang masih hairan kenapa budak tu pergi tandas perempuan yang busuk yang amat tu sedangkan tandas murid Pendidikan Khas yang tak seberapa busuk ada kat sebelah je. Maryleen pula jalan bukan main laju bila nak pergi ke Blok baru tu. Dia ejek kaki aku pendekkkkk and terus jalan laju sedangkan aku yang kat belakang ni berlari-lari anak nak catch up dengan dia !

Asam betul -_- And padan muka dia ! Sampai blok baru je, tandas tu kunci and kena patah balik ke blok lama. Hahahahaha !!

Tapi seriously, gila kan? (by the way, aku boikot kubikel tandas perempuan blok lama nombor 2, tempat budak PK tu *tuuuuttt* / *tuuuut tuuuuuuttt* / *tuuuut tuuuuut tuuuuutttt* tu)

And tadi, aku terkagum sekejap dengan sorang mamat ni ouh.

-Perbualan dengan Maryleen Mathilda a/p Alexius Silvester-

Aku : *tengah bosan dengar ceramah Encik Hazri, main dengan pensil, pandang luar tingkap and nampak mamat ni* Ya Allah *baling pensel* ! Maryleen ! Makhluk Allah mana handsome yang amat tu ?!

Maryleen : Hihi, handsome kan? Itulah ____________ !

Aku : Hah? Gilo mu ! Itu ke __________?! Tak percaya aku !

Maryleen : Iyeeee ! Tak caye tanya Munie ! Munieee !! Itu ___________ kan?!

Munie : Yeee ! OMG, dia pandang sini lahhh !

Aku : Gilo mu ! Hari tu korang tunjuk dia tak handsome langsung !

Maryleen : Tu lah kau, kutuk lagi taste aku.. Waaaa, handsomenya dia....

-tamat-

Haha, gatal mu :)

By the way, tadi ada check gigi, alhamdulillah gigi aku tak de yang berlubang :) Tak kuasa aku nak cabut gigi lagi weh (pengalaman ngeri masa kecil)..

Haha, banyak gila aku merapu hari ni. Aku off dulu okay? Byeee :)

p.s Singing can heal depression :) Believe me !

Currently singing : Like A Virgin by Madonna.

"You're so fine, and you're mine. I'll be yours till the end of time,'cause you made me feel, yeah you made me feel, I've got nothing to hideeee :) "

-Haha, lagu tu asyik main dalam kepala aku kot sepanjang hari !-

Anger

2010-08-23T02:25:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Aduhai, sedar-sedar dah 23 Ogos 2010. Masa berlalu cepat sangat ouh, serious tak suka. PMR makin dekat dan aku masih lagi tak yakin dengan subjek-subjek aku. Tengoklah, markah Maths aku menurun gila and markah yang lain pula, dengar cerita, masih terumbang-ambing. Urgh, rasa macam nak gugur aje jantung ni -_- (nasib baik tak gugur lagi yaww)

Anyway, hari ni sampai sekolah aje, dorang dah buka topik pasal result exam. Ramai yang tak puas hati sebab kelas kitorang di-compare-kan dengan kelas *tuuuuutttt*. Eh, aku pun menyampah kot. Kalau nak compare sangat, tak salah. Tapi biarlah adil kan? Kalau A mereka 75, biarlah A kami pun 75. Ni A kami 80, mereka 75, budak yang belum cukup masak pun boleh tahu itu tak adil. Kita yang dah masak ni?

Aduyaii, aku rasa kalau compare cara adil, gerenti dorang boleh kalah kot. Honestly, aku PENAT dengar complain pasal kelas kitorang itulah, inilahhh. Kelas *tuuuuuttt* bagus sangatlah, apa lah. Di sini, saya nak nyatakan satu fakta yang semua orang akan setuju. KELAS KAMI JUJUR, KELAS MEREKA KAKI BODEK !

-nah, puas hati aku-

Dah dah, tutup pasal kelas kaki bodek ok? Bulan puasa ni, lepas geram pun agak-agaklah :)

Hari ni sepanjang hari aku down ouh. Menangis gila gila aku. Pergi tandas menangis, pergi mana-mana merah aje mata aku. Aku rasa tak ada apa-apa yang lebih pedih dari rasa ditipu, dikhianati kepercayaan dan cinta kita selama ni rupanya bukan dibalas sepenuhnya. Pedih sangat weh, pedih. Haihh , kepada Maryleen, Filzah, Shida.. korang kawan sejati aku :) Terima kasih sangat-sangat sebab ada dengan aku bila aku perlukan korang.

Dugaan Ramadhan. Serious aku tak sabar *tuuuttt* ni habis supaya aku boleh ambil wuduk, solat and nangis puas-puas depan Allah. Aku perlukan ketenangan sekarang. Seriously, kalau aku banyak duit, dah lama aku lari ke Makkah nak cari ketenangan abadi (ecehh, macam cerita Nur Kasih puloks)

Sebelum aku merapu ya bukan, baik aku tutup cerita aku :)

p.s There are 5 stages of grief in medical term ; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. I need to complete these stages to get full recovery. Friends, I need youuuu :(

Don't Stop Believing

2010-08-21T00:41:00.001-07:00

Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world,

She took the midnight train going anywhere,

Just the city boy, born and raised in South Detroit,

He took the midnight train going anywhere.

A singer in a smokey room,

A smell of wine and cheap perfume,

For a smile they can share a night

It goes on and on and on and on.

Strangers, waiting, up and down the boulevard,

Their shadows searching in the night,

Streetlight, people, living just to find emotion,

Hiding, somewhere in the night..

Working hard to get my fill,

Everybody wants the thrill,

Payin' anything to roll the dice,

Just one more time.

Some will win, some will lose,

Some were born to sing the blues,

Oh, the movie never ends,

It goes on and on and on and on.

Strangers, waiting, up and down the boulevard,

Their shadows searching in the night,

Streetlight, people, living just to find emotion,

Hiding, somewhere in the night..

Don't stop believing, hold on to that feeling,

Streetlight, peopleeeeeeee ....

Don't STOP.

Sekolah ganti

2010-08-20T23:37:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Hari ini hari Sabtu, sekolah ganti dan seperti yang aku sangka, mesti ramai yang tak datang :) Serious, aku tak pernah tengok sekolah sekosong tadi :D

Sampai sekolah, bacaan Yassin and then masuk kelas balik. Lepas dapat kertas Trial Maths yang merobek hati aku tu, semua murid tingkatan 3,4,5 kena turun ke tapak perhimpunan sebab dorang nak gabungkan kelas. Perhatian kepada Cik Shahidah Suliman, anda amat rugi kerana tidak datang hari ini kerana saya nampak S dan B anda dengan dekat hari ni. Barisan dorang agak dekat dengan 3RK1 tadi :) Alahaaaiii..

Kelas 3RK1 tadi digabung dengan 3RK2. Hahaha, gila-gila kot. Masuk kelas RK2, duduk sekejap and baru nak relax, nampak semua orang keluar kelas. Ingatkan nak bahagi kelas lagi, rupa-rupanya dorang nak spray kelas tu dengan sembur nyamuk. Banyak kott dorang sprayy ! Boleh pengsan aku dengan bau tu, jadi aku blah jauh-jauh :) Err, tapi nyamuk kat situ nyawa amat liat ye, dah spray pun hidup lagi. Yang buat aku geram, tadi nyamuk suka sangat gigit aku (tahulah darah aku manis, aku doa nyamuk tu kena diabetes sebab minum banyak sangat darah aku) dan aku tak suka menggaru kaki aku yang gatal ni. Waaa, gatal, gatal !

Sementara nak tunggu waktu balik, berborak dengan Eric, Luqman and Iqraq. Ceh, ada satu part aku teremo lebih kot bila tanya hal lelaki. Adoyy, maluuu , nasib baik Mary tenangkan. Sebelum balik, Iqraq sempat nak letupkan apa ke benda tah. Ergh, kalau aku pekak hari Isnin nanti, pandai-pandai lah korang tahu sebabnya, alright?

Basically, aku agak enjoy kelas ganti hari ni :) Walaupun aku rasa, kalau lagi ramai mesti lagi seronok.

Hurt

2010-08-19T23:29:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum.

Alhamdulillah, selesai juga trial kali ni. Pergh, penderitaan aku sepanjang seminggu ni hilang sebentar, dan aku tahu dia akan datang balik masa PMR, kan kan kan? Gedik ouh :)

Sepanjang hari ni aku terseksa. People, not knowing something is torturing. Aku memang tak suka orang berahsia dengan aku. Maryleen pun satu, bagi clue macam-macam, naik gila aku nak meneka. Konon tak nak bagi fikiran aku bercelaru sebelum exam, tapi lagi serabut jadinya, adalah. Aku masih tak boleh lupa bila Mary pegang tangan aku kuat-kuat and suruh aku jadi kuat bila dapat tahu benda tu. Kalau korang jadi aku, korang nak tak tahu apa benda yang dia maksudkan tu??!!

Apa aku merepek tah. Exam KH tu macam biasa je. Teras alhamdulillah agak senang. Perdagangan, yang bahagian akaun segala hukum hakam aku langgar. Yang didebit, aku kreditkan, yang dikredit, aku debitkan :) Doa ajelah betul :)

Lepas exam, finally Mary beritahu apa rahsia tu and... hati aku remuk gila bila dapat tahu. Aku tak menangis (okay, aku pun terkejut gak) tapi.. entahlah, kecewa gila. Aku tak percaya segala yang aku takutkan selama ini, berlaku juga. Namun, aku redha. Lagipun, ALLAH Maha Adil lagi Bijaksana kan? Mungkin ini balasan atas dosa aku yang dulu, dan aku percaya ini semua ada hikmahnya.

Ouh, di sini saya ingin ucapkan terima kasih kepada Encik *tuuuuuttt*. Serious saya tak sangka balik-balik je awaklah orang pertama text saya setelah beberapa lama awak tak text. Saya pun tak sangka awak pula jadi tempat saya luahkan perasaan saya tentang rahsia tu. Saya tak sangka awak pula jadi orang pertama pujuk saya bila saya sedih pasal benda tu. Awaaaakkk, awak ada dengan saya bila saya perlukan awak, tapi saya pula tak ada dengan awak bila awak susah. Maafkan saya okay? Again, terima kasih awak :)

*saya tak kisahlah walaupun awak kebetulan aje text saya tadi, haha XD

p.s Mereka kata, aku cuma nak jadi baik sebab ni bulan puasa lah, apa lah. Aku anggap bulan puasa ni sebagai titik aku untuk memulakan perubahan. Salahkah?

Exam week :(

2010-08-17T22:44:00.001-07:00

Hey heyy :)

Haven't been here for a while. Goshhh ! I miss this blog so damn muchhhhh ! :)

I've been busy with the damn trial nowadays. Studying non-stop until my brain bleeds, normal :) I'll be my usual self after exam. During exam, I'm a totally different person. If you wonder why I sound so 'sengal' in this post, you'll understand why now :)

The first subject was BM, it was okay I guess. It's amazing how I can still manage to answer it even without studying. Honestly, I never actually revise for BM my whole life in high school. Came to school, sit in my 'comfy' chair, take out the pencil and pick whatever that sounds nice. And the marks... well, yeah, not so good. Maybe I should stop this attitude :D

History was okay I guess. Confusing, but okay. And Geography was hard, I started to hate it -_- And just yesterday, I think BI really let me down. My brain was like.. stuck when I wrote my essay and it turns out.. well, quite crappy. I'm so sorry Madam Sri ! :(

Today, the showdown. PAI and Science. Haha, I was so confident answering my Paper 1, but was totally shot down my Paper 2 :( PAI was hard, it's not actually surprising as I did not get much sleep last night and my head hurts like hell right now and then. But still, it's so disappointing as I spent hours from 1pm to 7pm and 9pm until 1am just to revise PAI, I still can't answer it. God, am I stupid?

Tomorrow, Maths. I'll try my very best. Pray for me :)

p.s Even with all this insecurities of my trial marks, I still have high hopes to get into Science stream next year. Haizzz -_-

tired,

syahirah

Kejamnya manusia sekarang :(

2010-08-13T16:59:00.001-07:00

Menangis ! Aku ingat hati cukup keras untuk tengok video ni, tapi tak. Berguguran juga air mata aku. Ya ALLAH, kenapa manusia kini kejam ya ALLAH? Kenapa?

~ tak guna aku berceloteh panjang. The video speaks for itself.

Letters to God.

2010-08-13T16:38:00.000-07:00

Ya Allah ya Tuhan Maha Berkuasa,

Aku memohon kepadamu ya Allah, ampunilah dosaku, ampunilah dosa ibu bapaku, ampunilah dosa si dia yang aku cintai, ampunilah dosa saudara Islamku yang lain. Rahmatilah kami, panjangkanlah umur kami, jauhilah kami dari azab nerakamu yang amat pedih itu ya ALLAH.

Aku tahu aku tidak layak untuk ke syurga-Mu, tapi aku juga tidah sanggup untuk ke Neraka Jahanam. Aku hanyalah hamba yang hina, hamba yang lemah, hamba yang sering kali tidak tahan menghadapi ujian-Mu. Aku lemah, aku tahu ya ALLAH. Kuatkanlah iman ku ya ALLAH, jauhilah aku dari perbuatan syirik ya ALLAH. Kuatkanlah akidah aku, kuatkanlah kepercayaan aku, dan jangan sesekali biarkan aku terpesong dari agama-Mu yang benar ya ALLAH.

Telah banyak kurniaan yang kau berikan kepada aku ya ALLAH, dan aku amat bersyukur. Aku takkan berjaya sekarang tanpa bantuan-Mu ya ALLAH. Jadikanlah aku insan yang berguna untuk masyarakat, aku tak nak jadi sampah masyarakat, aku tak nak kecewakan ibu bapaku yang amat berharap kepadaku ya ALLAH. Besar nanti aku akan jaga mereka baik-baik, itulah janjiku kepada-Mu ya ALLAH. Jadi, bantulah aku untuk berjaya. Kuatkanlah tekad ku.

Aku cintakan si dia ya ALLAH. Kami berjauhan, tapi cinta kami masih utuh. Terima kasih kerana menemukan aku dengan si dia ya ALLAH. Terima kasih ya ALLAH, terima kasih. Aku sayangkan dia, dan aku tak nak kehilangan dia ya ALLAH. Kekalkanlah jodoh kami sampai bila-bila ya ALLAH.

Trial makin dekat, bantulah aku untuk lulus dengan cemerlang. Betapa aku ingin masuk Aliran Sains ya ALLAH, bantulah aku ya ALLAH, bantulah aku.

Aku hanya hamba yang lemah, aku hanya mampu meminta pertolongan daripada-Mu ya ALLAH. Sesungguhnya tiada sesiapa lagi yang boleh aku meminta pertolongan dan mengadu, melainkan Kau ya ALLAH. Allah yang Maha Berkuasa, ALLAH yang Maha Mengetahui.

Amin ~~

luahan perasaan yang tertangguh

2010-08-13T15:42:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Yosh, banyak sungguh cerita aku nak cerita tapi asyik terbantut je sebab internet masalah. Grrr, geram, geram. Ingatkan ape yang rosak, rupanya line telefon bengong dan menyebabkan line Internet sama bengong. Sehati sejiwa la katakan. Kalau pandai, pandai sama-sama. Kalau bengong, bengong sama sama :)

Trial dah dekat, aku tak prepare apa-apa lagi. Bukan terlalu malas, setiap petang asyik depressed tak kena tempat, mana nak ingat apa-apa kan? Ya ALLAH, apa jadi dengan hamba-Mu ini ya ALLAH?

Puasa ni banyak menguji kesabaran aku. Terasa berat aje dugaan yang Allah berikan, dan aku asyik rasa aku tak boleh buat. Nampak sangat aku lemah bukan?

Semalam pula, tak ada elektrik masa nak buka puasa. Buka puasa dalam gelap, candlelight dinner. Katalah candlelight dinner tu romantik mana pun, aku tetap suka makan bawah sinaran cahaya elektrik yang tak romantik langsung tu. Jauh lebih praktikal -_-

Ayah aku pula bengang bila elektrik tak ada. Agaknya lepas penyangak yang khianat elektrik kitorang hari tu, TNB buat balik pemasangan elektrik tu, and something went wrong, terus terputus bekalan elektrik kitorang. Ergh, aku benci gila penyangak tu. Aku ingat bila dia dah pindah, hidup aku dah aman. Rupanya hati dia ni busuk sungguh sampai khianat kitorang walaupun dah pindah.

Memang kesabaran aku teruji semalam. Nak aje aku doa anak kembar dengan bini dia mati accident. Maklumlah, doa orang yang dikhianati makbul kan? Tapi aku tahu tak baik doa keburukan orang, so aku doa polis tangkap dia and hukum dia habis-habis. Biar hidup dia sengsara macam dia hampir buat kitorang sengsara. Marilah doa satu hari nanti dia terima balik hukumannya.

Allah Maha Adil, aku percaya Dia akan balas semua yang berlaku.

Lagi satu, aku rindu gila kat dia :( Dia balik sekejap aje. Aku tak tahu kenapa aku macam terseksa bila dia tak ada :( Berikanlah aku kekuatan ya ALLAH , bantulah aku :(

I'm getting better, I guess

2010-08-12T01:28:00.000-07:00

Salam :)

Yaw, haha, aku dah happy balik. Err, aku tak tahu kenapa aku depressed gila setiap kali petang, masa tengah puasa :( Hormon kah? Ah, mungkin aku tak biasa lagi. Tahun ni aku tak ganti puasa :) Nak ganti apa pun? Tahun lepas aku puasa penuh :) Tak percaya? Tak nak percaya cakap aku sudah, yang penting ALLAH makbulkan doa aku untuk puasa penuh tahun lepas. Tahun ni? Insya-ALLAH :)

Anyways, hari ni agak membosankan -_- Pergi sekolah, jumpa kawan, gelak-gelak (Shida tak percaya aku datang awal ouh), usik kawan, baca buku, buat latihan, gelak lagi, tepuk tampar, buat drama (dalam essay) dan berbagai-bagai lagi :)

Seronok buat essay tadi :D Pertama kali aku puas gila beng tulis pasal The Phantom of The Opera. Segala karekter aku kutuk, dari Raoul yang 'hidup terlalu mudah' kepada Christine yg terlalu lembik dan asyik menangis tak sudah.

Aku tak tahu lagi apa nak cerita. Lepas buka puasa, aku lupa terus segala kesedihan, and makan makan dan makan. serious aku dah tak kisah diet ke ape :) Why live long if you're not happy?

i want to do things my own way, and I will continue doing so.

syahirah

I.. seriously can' take it anymore

2010-08-11T01:52:00.000-07:00

Tak larat, tak larat, tak larat :(

Ish, kenapa baru-baru ni aku macam.. hurhh.. sedih sangat? Asyik-asyik nak menangis, asyik-asyik nak menangis. Ini bukan aku ! Aku tak nak menangis, aku tak suka menangis. Buat lagi sembap mata aku aje. Tapi.. entahlah, perasaan memang susah kita nak kawal kan?

Aku hilang mood nak study, hilang mood nak buat latihan, hilang mood nak tengok tv, hilang mood nak makan dan minum (nasib baik puasa tiba).. hilang mood nak buat semua benda :( Depressed weh, depressed. Pergi sekolah buat sakit hati je, cemburu je aku tengok muka semua orang gembira dengan ikhlas, sedangkan aku cuba palsukan senyuman, tak nak orang tahu aku tengah sedih.

Bengong kan? Dah sedih tu sedih lah, nak sembunyi ape kejadahnya? Well, memang dah semulajadi aku, aku hipokrit, dari dulu lagi agaknya. Terlalu sibuk jaga perasaan orang, sehingga sanggup menyembunyikan kebenaran. Kini, aku tipu diri sendiri. Aku kecewa dengan diri aku sendiri.

Ditambah lagi dengan tekanan trial lah, PMR lah, segala macam lagilah. Segala kesedihan aku, aku lepaskan pada bantal busuk kesayangan aku tu, entah-entah bantal tu dah lencun dengan air mata aku ouh. Ishh, sorry sayang.

Agaknya bantal itu sahajalah kawan aku yang paling sejati, bukan? Dia aje yang temani aku bila aku sedih macam ni. Kawan aku? Entahlah, mungkin aku sendiri terlalu ego untuk cerita masalah aku kat dorang. Entahlah, aku tak tahu, dan aku tak nak tahu.

~ I just need you to be there for me, is it that hard? ~

depressed,

syahirah

Tak jadi, tak jadi

2010-08-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum hello ! :)

Haha, baru balik sekolah yaww, awal gila, pukul 12.30 dah keluar dah :D Gosh I love Ramadhan. Lebih banyak masa aku, alhamdulillah :D

Tapi lapar ouh kat sekolah. Sebelum-sebelum ni mana pernah aku dahaga tengok non-muslims minum :( tapi hari ni... ishh, sedih aku dow. Iqraq pun sumpah sengal, pergi ambil kek dari siapa tah, and tunjuk depan batang hidung aku yang mancung ni. Tak pe tak pe, tahulah aku balas satu hari nanti.

Aku tak tahu kenapa temper aku naik cepat hari ni. Tadi, kertas BM aku hilang, aku macam nak ketuk kepala aku kat meja sebab tahan nak mencarut (astagfirullah, alhamdulillah aku tak mencarut ouh,haha) and bila aku sedar buku Grammar aku tak hantar lagi, and beberapa kertas Maths tak hantar semalam, aku melenting kat Mary. Bukan salah dia, salah aku tapi aku melenting kat dia kenapa ekh? Errr...

Gosh, and kat Facebook pula, sorang budak ni tak habis-habis tanya pasal Filzah. Annoying dohh ! Ingat aku personal assistant dia ke? Hey, dia pun rimaslah dengan kau, aku pun rimas dengan kau, tahu tak? Aku cakap bagi pihak Filzah dan pihak aku, okay? Dan lagi satu, silalah jangan perasan. Filzah tak rasa pun apa yang kau rasa dia rasa kat kau. Okay? Oh, nasib baik kau dah berhenti call aku semua. Kalau tak, dah lama aku bahan kau dalam blog ni.

Ramadhan ni bawa dugaan yang dahsyat untuk aku. Bukan sebab temper, sebab homework, atau sebab lapar dan dahaga. Tak perlulah aku sebutkan sebabnya, korang tak yah sibuk nak tahu hahahaa XD

Haihh, yang aku tahu, biarlah hati aku punah sorang-sorang. :(

tercabar,

syahirah

Salam Ramadhan :)

2010-08-10T06:11:00.000-07:00

Assalamualaikum :)

Ya Allah, cepat sungguh masa berlalu kan? Pejam celik pejam celik, dah Ramadhan. Jadi, sebelum apa-apa, saya ucapkan selamat berpuasa kepada semua umat Islam :) Ingat ya, buka puasa pada waktu Maghrib, bukan waktu Dhuha :D Kang ada pula yang silap kang. Hahaha XD

Sekarang ni, parents aku and adik aku pergi tarawikh. Aku tak pergi :( Homework banyak gila ouh. Azam aje lebih, konon nak siapkan petang tadi. Tapi habis-habis, ubat batuk tu tewaskan aku, terlelap.. err , lamalah juga. Sampai tak sempat aku nak siapkan homework yang berlambak tu :(

Trial pula 16/8. Errr, aku tak sedia lagi, serious tengah cuak gila. Ada pula suara-suara kata trial ni penentu aliran kita tahun depan. Ouh gosh, kena buat betul-betul la kot, dah lah aku lemah nak mati dalam Maths. Boleh ada peluang ke nak masuk aliran Sains tahun depan? Harap-harap dapat la ye, aku actually tak sabar-sabar nak belajar Biologi, Fizik, Kimia, Add Maths and segala benda alah tu :) <-- tahun depan, ada kemungkinan aku baca semua ini dan tergelak sendiri XD

So, macam mana ni? Doakan aku berjaya ye :)

Just another thing, aku nak minta maaf banyak-banyak kalau aku pernah buat salah kat korang. Manalah tahu ayat-ayat aku dalam blog ni ada yang buat perasaan orang tersinggung, aku minta maaf sangat-sangat :(

- Maklumlah, mulut sekali laser macam aku ni, errr.. pandai-pandailah <-- tak de idea nak sambung ayat.

Alright , aku stop sekarang. Goodbye, bye bye, assalamualaikum :)

The Red Velvet :)

2010-08-08T02:28:00.000-07:00

Nampak sedap kan? Haha, seriously, aku suka benda alah ni :)

Cupcakes, always my favourite :D Yesterday, I found out about red velvet cupcake and bought one at Amcorp Mall, for RM2 each, and it tastes, absolutely uh-mazing !

Nak beli lagi, boleh tak? Siapa nak belanja? Siapa belanja, aku sayang dia ketat-ketat :)

Gila-gila di Hari Koko

2010-08-07T16:59:00.000-07:00

Hari yang sengalll :D

Macam tangga kan? Haha XD Ouh, dan saya bernilai JAUH lagi tinggi dari kupon RM1 :)

Yosh ! Yesterday was Koko Day at school !! Wohooooo :D Yeah it was damn exciting, I laughed a LOT and basically, I did have fun :)

I got there quite early and by the time I got there, Jahan saw me and walked with me. I kept quiet while walking with her and listened to whatever she said about her friends blah blah blah. Truthfully, I'm not that good listener. She talked and talked, but I have zero idea where my mind was.

The perasmian was kinda good I guess. I mean, Dato' Ong Tee Keat didn't come on time like the Principal said, but it was okay. I didn't mind that much. It was quite fun waiting for him, I kept on hitting Shida's back with this.. okay I have no idea what that is but it sure was fun :)

The first thing I bought during Hari Koko was sandwiches from the English Club stall :) I was quite fussy though. I wanted to buy the egg sandwich ONLY but only the egg sandwich WITH the tuna sandwich was available. Urghh, I hate tuna. So, I asked Nina to make special one for me :) Egg sandwich with no cucumber. Special for me alone, lalala ~ Thanks Nina :)

My feet hurts right now :( As my friends could not sit at one place during the Hari Koko. I know I 'tawafed' the school for quite a few times -_-

I learnt that my friends were quite mean. You see, Jahan sat with us and Mary did not like it as she wasn't fond to Jahan. So, she tried to get us out of there. She went away with Elza and Shida whispered to me to find a way to get out of there. I guess Jahan maybe heard us and just went away from us without any other word, and we didn't get any chance to do anything. I felt quite bad as she just treated me a cup of ice cream earlier :(

Ah, forget about that. I'll learn to get rid of this guilt later.

By the way, we found that KO do know Mary's name :) He called her name but she IGNORED him ! Suh-tupid sungguh ! Waaaa, I know I just found something to usik her soon ! :)

Things went normally after that :) Nothing special I guess. I was quite frustrated because I didn't get to buy satay from the Geography stall :( It looked delicious ! But there's too many people wanted to buy it and I had to wait FOREVER for it, so I decided, okay, maybe some other time -_-

erghh, people were such busybodies, I wanted to buy, then they wanted to buy. Erghh -_-

Got home, and I had terrible headache :( Ate too much I guess?

p.s This darn picture took FOREVER TO DOWNLOAD ! Arghhhh !

ikan keli yang terselamat dimasak menjadi sambal :)

2010-08-06T00:59:00.000-07:00

Honestly, memang dah lama aku mengidam nak makan ikan keli sambal :( Walaupun baru minggu lepas aku makan, aku tetap nak makan juga minggu ni ! Tak puas makan minggu lepas ! Seekor mana cukup ! Aku ni, kena sepuluh ekor baru cukup tahu? <-- Haha, hiperbola.

Nak dijadikan cerita, hari ni aku duduk dekat kolam ikan dengan Filzah, Aishaa,Linda and Nadiah, borak-borak. Kolam ikan tu tak de ikan ouh, err sebab tukang cuci tu nak bersihkan kolam tu, so dia letak ikan-ikan dalam kolam ikan tu ke dalam sebuah baldi yang dipenuhi air yang khas untuk ikan-ikan di kolam ikan yang tak de ikan tu <-- ayat gila.

Ceh, sedang khusyuk berborak dan mengumpat dengan mereka-mereka ni, tiba-tiba seekor ikan keli ni, MELOMPAT keluar dari baldi tu. Nah, menjerit kitorang. Siapa tak terkejut, tiba-tiba je benda hitam melompat keluar dari benda alah tu. Aku pula mati-mati ingat tu ulat laut/gamat (mana datang tah).

Linda sebagai penyelamat ikan keli, ambil kayu and try nak angkat ikan keli tu. Honestly, aku tak tahu apekejadahnye guna kayu tu, ikan keli tu dahlah licin -_- Tapi dari aku yang buat, baik Linda yang buat kan? Dia lebih memahami, muahahahahahaha XD

Tapi kenapa bila aku nampak ikan keli yang tengah bergelut dengan nyawa tu, aku terus teringatkan ikan keli sambal ekh? Eh kau ni Syahirah, makan je tahu. Hahahahaha XD

Linda berjaya juga menyelamatkan ikan keli tu, haha. Macam mana dia buat? Err, entah, aku tak tengok. Masa tengah kecoh-kecoh tu jugalah mak aku call suruh balik (kantoi bawa phone ke sekolah). Terlepas ! Rugi rugi rugi !

Grrr, and mereka ni, dengan tiada motifnya, bila aku tengah jalan nak balik, nyanyi lagu Doraemon untuk aku. Okay, hari ni dah lah aku terambil baju yang sikit punya besar, and aku rasa aku makan banyak gila hari ni, so bila dorang nyanyi tu, terasa tahu? Hahahahahaha XD

Ye lahh, aku sedar aku siapa (cehh, ayat makan dalam).

p.s I'm looking forward for tomorrow !

tengah mengidam,

syahirah

Kecewa, terlalu kecewa

2010-08-03T06:31:00.000-07:00

Ya Allah yang Maha Berkuasa, aku memohon ya ALLAH, selamatkanlah saudaraku di Palestin. Selamatkanlah mereka dari ditindas oleh rejim Zionis itu ya ALLAH. Bantulah mereka ya ALLAH !

Menangis aku tengok video budak kecil yang merayu-rayu kepada askar Israel supaya lepaskan ayahnya yang ditangkap. Panas hati aku melihat mereka tidak mengendahkan rayuan budak kecil itu. Budak kecil itu seolah-olah tahu, hayat ayahnya tidak lama, seolah-olah dia tahu, ayahnya akan pergi buat selama-lamanya.

Kejam sungguh. Bagaikan syaitan bertopengkan manusia. Ya ALLAH........

Tidakkah ironik, selepas video itu disiarkan di Buletin Utama, berita tentang pergolakkan dan pergaduhan antara negara Islam pula disiarkan? Bagaimana kita hendak bantu saudara kita sekiranya kita sendiri bersengketa antara satu sama lain?

Aku pernah belajar dalam Pendidikan Islam betapa pentingnya umat Islam bersatu. Sekiranya tidak, kita akan ditindas, kita akan dipandang rendah, kita akan dilayan dengan buruk.... kini aku dapat lihat buktinya.

Betapa aku harap aku boleh membantu, namun hanya doa yang dapat aku sedekahkan. Mengapakah aku rasa sungguh tidak bermaya?

p.s If this is how the world is, I'd rather not spread my wings and fly away.

Frust gila ouh.. p.s Shida psycho !

2010-08-02T02:19:00.000-07:00

Salam. Haha, hari ni kelakar la juga (kot).

First thing in the morning, aku dah tekad nak datang lambat ke sekolah, sebab serious aku malas nak tolong dalam persediaan pentas (haha, pengawas sejati). Bangun pun pukul 6.15, aku mandi pun melenggang dan terketar-ketar (sejuk wokk) and pakai baju dengan selambanye. Tapi tengok-tengok aku siap pukul 6.45. WHAT?!!

Nak tak nak kena datang awal la kan? Sampai sekolah, aku jalan dengan Farah. Err, kira nasib baik juga datang awal, abang-abang form 4 and 5 macam dah bengang je dengan yang lambat. Aku walaupun sampai tepat-tepat pada masanya dan selamat daripada menolong angkat kerusi, Ruben beri kepercayaan kpd aku untuk tulis nama pengawas yang lewat. Okay, serious aku rasa bersalah gila tulis nama dorang, sebab aku pun bukannya awal sangat, dan terpaksa tulis nama KAWAN yang lambat, lagi beratlah kan?

Haihh, biarlah. Then, masa perhimpunan, TERPAKSA pegang bendera Jalur Gemilang tu, grrr. Berat doww, tak bagi kena lantai pula tu -_- Memang aku sayang Malaysia, tapi tangan aku pun sakit juga, so tadi taklah sayang sangat kan.

Bila nak kibar pun susah, dorang ni pun nak kata bongok ke ape, tak tahu lah. Nak suruh kibar, kenapa letak aku tengah-tengah pelajar lewat dengan form 5?! Sekor-sekor kena libasan Jalur Gemilang tadi, haha, kesian doww :)

Lepas perhimpunan kena marah lagi, aishhh !! Boring weh, B-O-R-I-N-G !

Err, masa BM dan BI sangat tidak menyeronokkan hari ni. Boring gila -_- Masa PAI, okay, kawan-kawan semua, saya nak umumkan, Shahidah binti Suliman sangatlah psycho ye. Ustazah beritahu bahan-bahan yang tidak boleh digunakan untuk istanjak ; Makanan.

Aku cakap kat dia, "Shida, kalau makanan boleh istinjak kann... *gelak gelak*"

Eh, ingat dah habis takat tu je, dia SAMBUNG ! "Ha' ah ! Bayangkanlah coklat, kita istinjak, lepas tu bagi kat orang...." EWWWWW !!! Then dia sambung, sambung dan sambung.

Akibatnya, aku dah tak nak makan coklat dah.

Hantu betul hang Shida :( *siapa suruh aku start, padan muka*

Masa balik tadi ... :(

Ayah aku ambil aku, then dia start enjin kereta and jalan. Aku buat muka blur je, then ayah aku cakap, "Itu ke budak Belgium tu?"

Hah? Budak Belgium ? Mana mana mana mana mana mana???!! Ishh, hari ni aku tak tengok betul-betul pun muka dia doww, lepas tu aku pusing kepala sampai nak tercabot cari dia.

Ayah aku pandang aku macam aku dah kena sawan, and cakap "Dia dua langkah belakang kau je tadi, takkan kau tak nampak?"

HAH??!! Gilaaaa !!! Dadaaaaaaaa, biar betol !

Ayah aku sambung lagi, "In fact, bila kau buka pintu kereta tadi, kau langgar dia lah !"

HAHHHH ??!!! Weh, frust gila wehh -_-

p.s How to be observant?

Oh comelnya Doraemon :D

2010-07-31T06:11:00.000-07:00

Waaa :D Suka suka suka !! Hehehe, sumpah aku rasa Doraemon comel doww :D Dah lama aku tak tengok kartun dia, tadi tengok balik pukul 7.30 dekat NTV7 (nah, nak promote jugak) and jatuh hati all over again :D
*back off people, he's mine !!! (haha, ayat psycho)

Eh, masa kecik dulu aku selalu baca komik Doraemon :) Tengok ar, berapa banyak koleksi aku ada. Malangnya, semua mak aku dah simpan dalam kotak, dia tak nak bukak !! Dia kata budak dah besar tak boleh baca komik !! Waaa, mummy !!! Mahal komik tu, satu RM4.50, aku ada koleksi sampai buku 45 -_- Kiralah berapa banyak aku spend untuk komik tu :( Pastu tak boleh baca pulak? KEJAM !

*Eh jap, bajet guna duit aku je :) Duit arwah tok wan aku lah. Beliau yang selalu belikan aku komik tu. Hehe, aku ngan Hanis selalu ketuk duit tok wan ouh :D Dia bagi semua yang kitorang nak pulak tu. Guuhh :'( I miss him..

Aishhh :) Kalau aku kata, dulu aku berangan aku jadi Nobita, percaya tak? Eh, serious best kalau Doraemon wujud dalam dunia nyata ouh :) Semua benda yang mustahil, menjadi tidak mustahil. Alahaiii, seronoknya berangan.

Aku nak jadi serajin Doraemon (tapi tak nak ikut dari segi fizikalnya ye) tapi sekarang ni aku semalas Nobita -_- Apa nak jadi ni?

p.s Saya tak nak jadi orang yang rugi :(

Faithfully :)

Last short note.

My baby dream

Semak gila orang macam ni ouh.

Changing.

The Day I'll Never Forget

Lost Spirit.

Missing party :)

Si Gemuk Gedempol diperli

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows.

Modesty.

Kids, haha

Two days.

Hello Nokia C3, bye bye i-Mobile 318

Crushed.

Finally.

TO CLASS *TUUTT*, I LOATHE YOU.

Cooking for the first time.

What the.. waa ! comel gila budak ni !

Fell in love with Christopher Doll

25 random things about me

Flowers in the Attic

Today's story and a night at Jusco Taman Maluri

Public Speaking and Banner

Tak tahu nak bagi tajuk apa, haha :)

Dumb, dumb, dumb

Over the limits

Today totally rocks !

I'm engaged and getting married soon, yeay !

Extreme dislikes

Alahai mak nyah..

The Only One :)

Sweet and Sour

One call made my day

20102010

Man, what a boring day -_-

Patiently waiting.

Penat, tak tahan !

Corus Hotel and Palace of Golden Horses :)

Budak pandai :)

Boring day -_-

Serious aku tak suka, faham tak? TAK SUKA !

THE BLACKER UTAN DRAMA

What a boring day -_-

Old thoughts

I'm sorry kitty :(

Last day of PMR :)

Kisah PMR 2010

OH PMR :(

Headache

Afiah Dilla, he's your second best.

I'm not strong to face this losers -_-

Puan Lextra, tolonglah berubah (oh, Am juga)

P.S I LOVE YOU :)

When you're in love, waiting seems to be forever.

New background

Merepek aje

Secret ingredients :)

Hari Raya 2010

Babysitting ?

Lost 5kg, gained 10 kg.

Syurgamu Ramadhan :)

Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir dan batin :)

Ramadhan is leaving us :(

Err, ni siapa?

Don't be sad, why should you? :)

TIGA RK SATU XD

Class X and Secret Admirer !

I'm missing him

The cat that falls in love,haha

Stop Insulting Malaysia, boleh tak?

Alhamdulillah, 8A :)

The Rose

Under pressure

I do not understand -_-

Independence Day yaww :)

Love and Hypocrisy

Today ..

Pasar Ramadhan PKNS Bangi :)

The Handsome One

TO CLASS TUUTT, I LOATHE YOU.